A Piece Of Cake Quotes & Sayings

When I left her office, I felt like she'd gut-punched me, brushed me off, slapped me back and forth, gave me a cool compress to put on my cheeks, cold-cocked me with a stiff uppercut to the jaw, picked me up, brushed me off again, then kicked me in the seat of my pants as she handed me a piece of cake and showed me the door.
Being a reporter isn't as easy as it looks. — Christopher Paul Curtis

Constructing a social system that tends to those who agree with it is a piece of cake compared to constructing one that makes those who disagree with it want to obey its principles. — Erik Naggum

I don't know what happened. One minute, I was dreamin' about a fat piece of George Clooney and a hot date with some brown sugar pound cake, and the next thing I knew, the house was coming down on us. — Kami Garcia

Everyone is dealing with something. This is life; this is not just a piece of cake. — Tom Brady

You don't want to raise a kid in a culture where the kid who asks the most questions is annoying. You want a culture where the kid who asks the most questions gets awards and gets another piece of cake. — Neil DeGrasse Tyson

We all have the right to choose our own gods, and worship them. No matter even if it is a stone, an animal or a piece of cake. — M.F. Moonzajer

My girl looks at me like I'm a big piece of cake and she is the fattest kid in America craving me. — Toni Aleo

The prima ballerinas who taught me were far more scary than Gordon Ramsay. They'd scream at me and pull my legs and arms, so after them Gordon was a piece of cake. — Jennifer Ellison

If you want self-esteem." "Do estimable acts" ~ V, from A Piece of Cake: Memoir — Cupcake Brown

Teaching in a village school in Nepal was a freaking piece of cake compared to teaching in my native land. — Nicholas D. Kristof

I love the music, but being on the road ain't a piece of cake, but it is real rewarding. You've got to - all those people can't come to my house, so I've got to go out on the road and play for them. — Charlie Musselwhite

Ascribing meaning to life is a piece of cake compared to actually living it."
-from "Hear the Wind Sing — Haruki Murakami

It's much harder to play beloved than to play a rotten guy. Rotten guy is a piece of cake. So playing a beloved person really sets a high bar for your behavior and your acting and what you project. — Bill Murray

I find the act of writing very painful. I can go a whole month without managing a single line, or write three days and nights straight, only to find the whole thing has missed the mark.
At the same time, though, I love writing. Ascribing meaning to life is a piece of cake compared to actually living it. — Haruki Murakami

I never in my life argued with a piece of cake or a bowl of ice cream. — Ray Bradbury

Oh, Kendra, before I forget, Gavin asked me to give you this letter." He held out a gray, speckled envelope.
"Happy birthday to you!" Seth exclaimed, his voice full of implications.
Kendra tried not to blush as she tucked the envelope away.
"Dear Kendra," Seth improvised, "you're the only girl who really gets me, you know, and I think you're very mature for your age
"
"What about some cake?" Grandma interrupted, holding the first piece out to Kendra and glaring at Seth. — Brandon Mull

They are totally in the dark, the whole lot of them. They only pretend to think about important stuff...Sure, they have to use their brains a little to get rich in the first place, but once they make it it's a piece of cake--they don't need to think anymore. Like an orbiting satellite doesn't need gas. They just keep going round and round, always over the same damn place. — Haruki Murakami

Everything isn't a piece of cake. You say two plus two equals four, but do you know what happens when you add two piles of sand with two others, Tezee? You get one big pile of sand, not four!" - Aley — Shriya Sekhsaria

Some o' the words in this book might not be immediately pronounceable for some readers because they have foreign origins. Heck, I needed help myself. But I like learning new words and how to say them, so I'm providing a wee guide here for a few names and such in case you're of a like mind and want to know how to say them out loud. No one is going to confiscate your cake if you say them wrong, but you might score a piece of cake if you say them right. You know what? You should just have a piece of cake anyway. You deserve cake. — Kevin Hearne

Damning taxes is a piece of cake. It's defending them that's hard. — Jill Lepore

Lincoln Chafee, former governor of Rhode Island, announced he's running for president. Before he announced he's running, his wife went on Facebook and asked his staff if they remembered his password. Because if a Facebook password is too hard to remember, the launch codes for the nukes should be a piece of cake. — Jimmy Fallon

I love sweets. I have a tendency to go out at, like, 11 P.M. and get a giant piece of cake because I'm craving it. The problem is if you eat a big piece of cake that late, you wake up in the morning feeling really sick. — Brendan Robinson

How can you be afraid to feel? Isn't fear a feeling? If you're feeling fear, you've felt one of the most negative emotions there is to feel. Everything else should be a piece of cake. Feel good, feel happy, feel healthy, feel loved, feel abundant, feel creative, feel compassionate, feel knowledgeable, feel powerful. — Bashar Al-Assad

Meghan pushed her chocolate cheesecake across the table to me. I hadn't gotten paid yet for November, so I had only ordered coffee. "Here," she said.
"Don't you want it?"
"Sure I want it. I ordered it. But I'm giving it to you."
"Why?"
Meghan stood up and got me a fork. "Remember what Nora said about love? In your movie?"
"Love is when you have a really amazing piece of cake, and it's the very last piece, but you let him have it," I said.
"So it's really amazing cake," said Meghan. "And I want you to have it. — E. Lockhart

Adaptation is one of the great advantages to being born and bred in Jersey. We're simply not bested by bad air or tainted water. We're like that catfish with lungs. Take us out of our environment and we can grow whatever body parts we need to survive. After Jersey the rest of the country's a piece of cake. You want to send someone into a fallout zone? Get him from Jersey. He'll be fine. — Janet Evanovich

Well, getting up a tree is a piece of cake. But I can testify to the fact that going down is no easy feat. Now I knew why cats got stuck in them and needed a fireman to come to their rescue. Of course, having seen some of the sexy local firemen in their gear, I'd pretend to be stuck in a tree too. — S.M. Reine

On Saturday, he ate through one piece of chocolate cake, one ice-cream cone, one pickle, one slice of Swiss cheese, one slice of salami, one lollipop, one piece of cherry pie, one sausage, one cupcake, and one slice of watermelon That night he had a stomach ache. — Eric Carle

Your good friend has just taken a piece of cake out of the garbage and eaten it. You will probably need this information when you check me into the Betty Crocker Clinic. — Cynthia Nixon

Debbie had to get up and slice me a thick piece of cake before she could answer. And I do mean thick. Harry Potter volume seven thick. I could have knocked out a burglar with this piece of cake. Once I tasted it, though, it seemed just the right size. — Maureen Johnson

Don't be so concerned," he whispered. "We will get through this, I promise."
"What makes you so certain?" I couldn't help my skepticism.
"We have no other choice," he replied matter-of-factly.
"Is that really all you can come up with?" I scowled. "Couldn't you just lie and tell me you have some kind of secret badass weapon that is going to make this a piece of cake? — M.A. George

The brain interprets the nerve impulses to form an image. It is not until that happens that we really see the piece of cake. This delicious news is then passed on to the systems that control salivation, with mouth-watering results. Similarly, the mere sight of a yummy treat also causes the stomach to produce some digestive juices in anticipation. — Giulia Enders

Of the 664 men who rode into the Valley of Death about 540 eventually got out of it again. By far the highest casualty rate was among the horses. Compared with the Somme or an evening in the Blitz, the Valley of Death was a piece of cake. — Simon Heffer

Writing is a piece of cake. Editing is a slab of liver. — Evels

I'd had three great pregnancies. I thought morning sickness was the end of the world, and it's not until something pretty major happens that you're like, oh my gosh those were all a piece of cake. I had a pretty large bleed. I thought I was having a miscarriage. — Tori Spelling

I hate birthdays. I hate birthday parties. I hate them. I don't know what it is, anybody's only got to come wafting near me with a piece of cake with a candle on and I break out in hives. — Cat Deeley

Reggie always wears the team jersey - and a pair of shorts - no matter how cold it gets.
I'm betting he dreams about one day being called on to make a comeback.
'We need five tries in the last three minutes. It's almost impossible, Reggie. That's why I'm asking you.'
'Piece of cake, Dusty. Here, mind me false teeth.'
Dusty's been with the Gunners as long as I can remember. He's an institution - or he should be in one - it's one of the two. — Bill Condon

She glimpsed Levi cutting through the crowd to get to her. Smoothing her hair and finding a smile, she greeted him as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. "Would you like a piece of cake?" Levi peered down at her, concern lining his face. "Are you all right?" "Yes, of course. I'm fine." She tugged on her sleeve as if it could conceal the evidence of the sheriff's touch and reached for a clean plate. "You should try some of Chloe's lemon pound cake. It's delicious." Levi stroked her arm, his caress a soothing balm after the sheriff's manhandling. "Eden, look at me." She did, and all pretense fell away. "Did he hurt you?" "No." Eden sighed. — Karen Witemeyer

Do not envy others. If someone gets a larger piece of cake, be happy for them. They'll get fat and you'll stay thin. — Frederick Lenz

You have to have really wide reading habits and pay attention to the news and just everything that's going on in the world: you need to. If you get this right, then the writing is a piece of cake. — Terry Pratchett

When I was a little kid I had a very different meaning of life; simple like a cup of tea with sugar and a piece of cake, today the whole world doesn't give me that life. — M.F. Moonzajer

Give me a piece of cake from your love-life;
I'll show you how to lick fidelity's cream
off every layer you mistrust. — Munia Khan

Our poor human heart is flawed: it is like a cake without the frosting: the first two acts of the theatre without the climax. Even its design is marred for a small piece is missing out of the side. That is why it remains so unsatisfied: it wants life and it gets death: it wants Truth and it has to settle for an education; it craves love and gets only intermittent euphoria's with satieties. Samples, reflections and fractions are only tastes, not mouthfuls. A divine trick has been played on the human heart as if a violin teacher gave his pupil an instrument with one string missing. God kept a part of man's heart in Heaven, so that discontent would drive him back again to Him Who is Eternal Life, All-Knowing Truth and the Abiding Ecstasy of Love. — Fulton J. Sheen

Britain might be in the grip of rationing, but buying the materials for a homemade bomb was a piece of cake. (In fact, obtaining the ingredients for a decent cake would have been rather harder.) — Ben Macintyre

I have two children, and they know that I never pass up a piece of cake, ever. — Lisa Rinna

It's a cake," he said, shoving both hands under the thing and raising it with some difficulty. "From my mother." He managed to put it on the table without trapping his fingers. "Can you eat it?" said Nobby. "It's taken months to get here. You'd think it would go stale." "Oh, it's to a special dwarfish recipe," said Carrot. "Dwarfish cakes don't go stale." Sergeant Colon gave it another sharp rap. "I suppose not," he conceded. "It's incredibly sustaining," said Carrot. "Practically magical. The secret has been handed down from dwarf to dwarf for centuries. One tiny piece of this and you won't want anything to eat all day." "Get away?" said Colon. "A dwarf can go hundreds of miles with a cake like this in his pack," Carrot went on. "I bet he can," said Colon gloomily, "I bet all the time he'd be thinking, 'Bloody hell, I hope I can find something else to eat soon, otherwise it's the bloody cake again. — Anonymous

It is easy to tell the difference between Jews and Gentiles. After the show, all the gentiles are saying 'Have a drink? Want a drink? Let's have a drink!' While all the Jews are saying 'Have you eaten yet? Want a piece of cake? Let's have some cake! — Jackie Mason

By now I was feeling the shame but also defiance. Like here, I'm carrying the banner for all of you who cut off a little piece of cake wanting a big one, who spend a good third of your waking hours feeling bad about your desires, who infect those with whom you work and live with your judgements and pronouncements, you on the program who tally points all day long, every day, let's see, 7 for breakfast, I'm going to need only 3 or 4 for lunch, what the hell can I have for so little, oh, I know, broth and a salad with very little dressing. And broth is good! Yes! So chickeny! That's what we tell ourselves, we who cannot eat air without gaining, we who eat the asparagus longing for the potatoes au gratin, for the fettucine Alfredo, for the pecan pie. And if you're one of those who doesn't, stop right here, you are not invited to the rest of this story. — Elizabeth Berg

It's like this: if you have one piece of cake, and you eat it, that's fine.
If you have two pieces of cake, you should probably share some with a friend. But maybe not. Occasionally we could all use two pieces of cake.
But if you have a whole cake, and you eat *all* of it, that's not very cool. It's not just selfish, it's kinda sick and unhealthy. — Patrick Rothfuss

I'll have wine or a piece of cake once in a while, but I don't look at it as sliding backwards, even if I go a whole week without working out. I don't dwell on it and beat myself up - I just try to have a healthier day tomorrow. — Alison Sweeney

Life is much like a piece of cake,
Overeat and you get a stomachache. — Ana Claudia Antunes

Love is when you have a really amazing piece of cake, and it's the very last piece, but you let him have it. — E. Lockhart

She's a yellow pair of running shoes, a holey pair of jeans. She looks great in cheap sunglasses, she looks great in anything. She's, "I want a piece of chocolate cake; take me to a movie." She's a, "I can't find a thing to wear." Now and then she's moody. She's a Saturn with a sunroof with her brown hair blowing. She's a warm conversation I wouldn't miss for nothing. She's a fighter when she's mad and she's a lover when she's lovin'. — Brad Paisley

It's a piece of cake until you get to the top. You find you can't stop playing the game the way you've always played it. — Richard M. Nixon

A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece. — Ludwig Erhard

My attorney rubbed his hand across his mustache and the corners of his lips several times, as though the allegation was a piece of cake he'd just eaten that had deposited crumbs all over his mouth. — Alissa Nutting

These are big trade-offs for a simple piece of cake - add five hundred calories, subtract well-being, allure, and self-esteem - and the feelings behind them are anything but vain or shallow. — Caroline Knapp

Really, how bad is eating a piece of cake? Being bad is murdering someone. That's bad. Don't do that. — Sarah Michelle Gellar

Julia", I answered breathlessly.
"Chloe, are you in the bathroom fucking that nice slice of man cake?"
"I'll be there in a second, okay?" I ended the call and shoved the phone back into my bag. I looked up at him, feeling my rational side return after the small interruption. "I should go."
"Look, I-" He was cut off as my phone rang again. I answered without bothering to look at the screen.
"God, Julia! I'm not in here fucking the piece of man cake!"
"Chloe?" Joel's confused voice sounded through the phone.
"Oh ... hi." Shit. This could not be happening to me. — Christina Lauren

You sure you don't want me to come over? We could make a snowman in the garden, or one in front of the hotel for the guests' arrival tomorrow. Or we could build snow forts and have a snowball fight. Surefire way to wear you out and make you sleepy. Then we could have cocoa with marshmallows on top. And I've been dying to have a piece of that seven-layer chocolate cake. I can't quit thinking about it. — Terry Spear

No matter what else you came up against, if you could smile and laugh while a monkey did you with chestnuts in a dank concrete basement while somebody took pictures, well, any other situation would be a piece of cake — Chuck Palahniuk

Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake. — Larry Hagman

If that's the case, waiter, please bring me another piece of cake," Gramps said as lunch was brought to the table, "I'm all for fighting tyranny and oppression. — E.A. Bucchianeri

I had immediate success in the sense that I sold something right off the bat. I thought it was going to be a piece of cake and it really wasn't. I have drawers full of - or I did have - drawers full of rejection slips. — Fred Saberhagen

My Dad always used to say, " The first hundred years are the hardest ! After that it's a piece of cake ! — Harold Lee

Piece of cake." Brandon's grin had a certain very familiar male cockiness about it. "Dad says this time around I
was his sucker punch." His grin faded slightly and his expression grew more serious as he continued. "But when we
realized you were in danger, Dad went wild. I doubt if any car, even that old 'vette Dad used to drive, ever made the
kind of time on River Road your Buick made last night. Dad really is a hell of a driver, isn't he? — Jayne Ann Krentz

I was born and raised with crocodiles; they are a piece of cake. But kids are so ... unpredictable. — Steve Irwin

This may not be the most serious problem in the world, but it is a familiar one: How do you divide a piece of cake equally between two children and also make sure that each of them sees it as a fair division? — Eric Maskin

For me, the cinema is not a slice of life, but a piece of cake. — Alfred Hitchcock

In the beginning, I was put off by the harshness of German. Someone would order a piece of cake, and it sounded as if it were an actual order, like, 'Cut the cake and lie facedown in that ditch between the cobbler and the little girl'. — David Sedaris

I could rent Caesar out at birthday parties. Halloween parties. I could take pictures of Caesar eating a piece of birthday cake. Or a picture of a kid riding Caesar on his birthday. We could build a saddle. — Pat Conroy

Giving someone the benefit of the doubt is not so simple as it sounds. What it means, in fact, is being charitable--which, as the vicar is fond of pointing out, is the most difficult of the graces to master. Faith and hope are a piece of cake but charity is a Pandora's box: the monster in the cistern which, when the lid is opened, comes swarming out to seize you by the throat. — Alan Bradley

I want two of the four piece fried chicken dinners. Both with mashed potatoes and green beans. I also want two orders of grilled corn on the cob and a side of macaroni salad. Three slices of the banana cream pie and a piece of German chocolate cake. — Julia Keith

This, said Mother, as she handed him a piece of dry, tasteless matzoh, is the bread of our affliction. Where, young Kugel wondered, is the seven-layer cake of our salvation? Where is the muffin of our mirth? Where is our no-longer-reduced-to-jelly doughnut? — Shalom Auslander

Who're you going with, then?" said Ron.
"Angelina," said Fred promptly, without a trace of embarrassment.
"What?" said Ron, taken aback. "You've already asked her?"
"Good point," said Fred. He turned his head and called across the common room, "Oi! Angelina!"
Angelina, who had been chatting with Alicia Spinnet near the fire, looked over at him.
"What?" She called back.
"Want to come to the ball with me?"
Angelina gave Fred a sort of appraising look.
"All right, then," she said, and she turned back to Alicia and carried on chatting with a bit of a grin on her face.
"There you go," said Fred to Harry and Ron, "piece of cake. — J.K. Rowling

Go cons a piece of cake onto your mouth. — Daniel P. Friedman

You know, people always warn children about taking candy from strange adults. But they never warn us adults about taking candy from strange children.
All those sweet-looking kids who sell boxes of candy bars on the street to help pay for schooling - how do we know what's in those bars? And don't even get me stated on that nefarious institution designed to lure unsuspecting customers into buying mysterious frosted goodies: the bake sale.
Adults, be warned: if a child wanted to poison you it would be a piece of cake! Literally a piece of cake. — Pseudonymous Bosch

You're not looking for a partner," Ranger said. "You're looking for an enforcer. You hate to run. You must be worried about getting into that black dress. What did you eat just now? Piece of cake? Candy bar?"
"Everything," I said. "I just ate everything. — Janet Evanovich

She walks away, and I am too stunned to follow her. At the end of the hallways she turns and says, "Have a piece of cake for me, all right? The chocolate. It's delicious." She smiles a strange, twisted smile, and adds," I love you, you know." And then she's gone. I stand alone in the blue light coming from the lamp above me, and I understand: She has been to the compound before. She remembered this hallways. She knows about the initiation process. My mother was a dauntless. — Veronica Roth

There are those people who can eat one piece of chocolate, one piece of cake, drink one glass of wine. There are even people who smoke one or two cigarettes a week. And then there are people for whom one of anything is not even an option. — Abigail Thomas

Sometimes I wish I could just press a button and be through school and starting my real life,' I told him.
'This is your real life, Al,' he said, 'Don't start living in the future. That's like gulping down a piece of fudge cake and then asking yourself, 'Where'd it go?' You're missing the moment. — Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

If life was a piece of cake, it wouldn't be worth eating! — Christopher Jones

Most men, no matter how well or badly dressed, carry overstuffed, beat up wallets that should have been replaced years ago. Why is that? Every time I see a guy take out a wallet anywhere, it looks like a piece of old melted chocolate cake-with strings. — Jonathan Carroll

At 50, if you are on a diet on your birthday, you can't eat a piece of your birthday cake. So grab two, a piece in each hand and, lo and behold, you will be on a balanced diet! Happy birthday, old chum! — Abraham Lincoln

How about it, kids?" he said before we left for the game. "I could rent Caesar out at birthday parties. Halloween parties. I could take pictures of Caesar eating a piece of birthday cake. Or a picture of a kid riding Caesar on his birthday. We could build a saddle." "Caesar doesn't eat cake," Luke said. "He likes kids, though. We could take pictures of Caesar eating a kid at his last birthday party. Then we could take pictures of the hysterical mother trying to pull the tiger off her only child. Then we could take pictures of Caesar devouring the mother," I said. — Pat Conroy

If you promise to be good Paul you can have a piece of birthday cake but you won't have to eat any of the special candle so he promised to be good because he didn't want to be forced to eat any of the special candle but also because mostly because surely because Annie was great Annie was good let us thank her for our food including that we don't have to eat girls just wanna have fun but something wicked this way comes please don't make me eat my thumb Annie the mom Annie the goddess when Annie's around you better stay honest she knows when you've been sleeping she knows when you're awake she knows if you've been bad or good so be good for goddess' sake you better not cry you better not pout but most of all you better not scream don't scream don't scream don't scream don't He — Stephen King

The whole world's effort of working hard goes to waste. Just as the bull [that turns the wheels on the oil mill] gets a piece of oil-cake (as a reward), the wife gives the husband a piece of handvo (savory lentil and rice cake), and so the work continues. All day long, one is producing like the bull in the oil mill. — Dada Bhagwan

You can have diabetes and have a piece of cake. You cannot have diabetes and eat a whole cake. — Paula Deen

Like slipping on a banana peel around a corner at eighty miles an hour. Piece of cake. — Brandon Sanderson

When you are a hero you are always running to save someone, sweating, worried and guilty. When you are a villain you are just lurking in the shadows waiting for the hero to pass by. Then you pop them in the head and go home ... piece of cake. — James Marsters

In Britain, a cup of tea is the answer to every problem.
Fallen off your bicycle? Nice cup of tea.
Your house has been destroyed by a meteorite? Nice cup of tea and a biscuit.
Your entire family has been eaten by a Tyrannosaurus Rex that has travelled through a space/time portal? Nice cup of tea and a piece of cake. Possibly a savoury option would be welcome here too, for example a Scotch egg or a sausage roll. — David Walliams

Life is not a piece of cake — Ian Davies

What did you tell me, Jesse? Sure Jake, Stephanie will do exactly what you tell her. Sure Jake, protecting her will be a piece of cake. "
Snorting in disbelief, he added, "Being at war is safer compared to this shit, and it's a hell of a lot easier than looking after your girlfriend. — Nina D'Angelo

The reason I started with prostitutes was solely to work on my negotiating skills. Once I mastered negotiating with naked women, dealing with Interscope was a piece of cake. — Rivers Cuomo

Now, Hazel was not stupid. She knew that just because you see a piece of cake and a sign that says EAT ME doesn't mean you should actually do it. And just because two giant ravens point you in the direction of a path doesn't mean you should take it. But it was the only path she had. — Anne Ursu

But then she met Nick, who told her she was beautiful, and whenever he toucher her, it was as if his touch were actually making her as beautiful as he seemed to believe she was. So why would she deny herself a second piece of mud cake or glass of champagne if Nick was there with the knife or the bottle poised, grinning evilly and saying "You only live once," as if every day were a celebration. Nick had little boy's sweet tooth, and an appreciation of good food, fine wine and beautiful weather; eating and drinking with Nick in hot sunshine was like sex. He made her feel like a well-fed happy cat: plump, sleek, purring with sensual satisfaction. — Liane Moriarty

Functional analysis: learn your ABC's In addition to monitoring, try to track the events that immediately precede and follow your problem behavior. Do you drink more when something makes you feel angry? Lonely? Happy? What happens right after an angry outburst? Does the other person give in? Do you have a drink? Or do you withdraw to be alone? What makes you crave a piece of cake? How does eating it make you feel? This "functional analysis" can illuminate what is controlling the parts of your life that seem out of control. It is easy as A (antecedents) B (behavior) C (consequences). Antecedents can trigger a problem behavior, while the consequences reward or strengthen it, no matter how maladaptive it is. — James O. Prochaska

A hippo sandwich is easy to make. All you do is simply take one slice of bread, one slice of cake, some mayonnaise, one onion ring, one hippopotamus, one piece of string, a dash of pepper. That ought to do it. And now comes the problem ... biting into it! — Shel Silverstein

We can't get them to come to their senses until we get their names."
"I doubt it will be that simple."
"Oh, because I thought tracking down the names of six anonymous girls when we have no idea where they're from would be a piece of cake. — Kiersten White

Observing and commenting, it is a piece of cake.
Experiencing and sharing, that is a piece of work. — Toba Beta

It's a piece of cake, being a lawyer or a doctor or a computer systems analyst or an accountant. Libraries are full of books telling you how to do it. The only textbooks for private eyes are on fiction shelves, and I don't remember ever reading one that told me how to interrogate an eight-year old without feeling like I was auditioning for the Gestapo. — Val McDermid