Toni Maguire Quotes & Sayings

Inside our heads there is a space which is completely blank. It holds no memories and has no thoughts. Antoinette wanted to find that place for once there, the world no longer has the power to hurt. She wanted to curl up in the cocoon of her bedding until that time came and never have to face reality again. — Toni Maguire

Antoinette felt a pain in her chest that seemed to be a lump made of all the tears she had cried over the years. Where do they come from, she wondered. Is there a sac made of a thin membrane that our grief enters and becomes water, then, once filled, it finally bursts, releasing an unstoppable torrent? — Toni Maguire

A terrible sadness threatened to overwhelm me as I wondered how two people capable of such love for each other had eventually felt so little for the child they had produced between them. — Toni Maguire

So at twelve, I discovered that alcohol could dull pain and saw it as a friend. It was only in later years I realized that a friendship with a bottle can overnight turn into a relationship with the enemy. — Toni Maguire

A dog that has been beaten for years will die if it is thrown out in the street to fend for itself. It will cringe in corners, not trusting a soul but always hoping for some kindness. The one emotion it will not feel is relief at its freedom. — Toni Maguire

Don't tell Mummy,' he said, giving me a slight shake. 'This is our secret, Antoinette, do you hear me? — Toni Maguire

The smile on his lips was always the smile of the nice father, but in his eyes I could see the nasty one, the one invisible to everyone else, the one that lived inside his head. — Toni Maguire

I remember the pain I felt, and wonder why a man who was such an accomplished liar had to tell the truth that day. — Toni Maguire

I made a vow to myself, then, that no one would ever control my emotions. I would save love for the children I expected to have and for my animals. I would never allow myself to be made weak by it, never allow anyone to come that close. It was a decision that would cloud my life for many years. — Toni Maguire

She thought she must be ill, though she had no idea what was wrong with her. All she knew was that the world had become a frightening place. — Toni Maguire

The sense of security which she thought she had found disappeared; the bottom fell out of her world and she felt herself falling into an abyss of unbelieving despair. — Toni Maguire

We were young, she continued, while she had a bad heart. Did we not want to earn our tips, she asked us and, cowed, we refrained from introducing the subject again.
Her bad heart, I noticed, did not force her to abstain from smoking, or from eating large portions of puddings. Every time I heard her opening how she could not carry anything heavy, I thought sourly "except yourself". — Toni Maguire

Even if she had realized that she had a problem, she would not have cared. All she knew was that with each sip she took, the better she felt: her fear receded, her misery disappeared and her confidence grew. — Toni Maguire