Rich Burlew Quotes & Sayings

Hey, look, I just regenerated a finger. Guess which one. — Rich Burlew

Druids always pick the hard way; it encourages natural selection. — Rich Burlew

Let's see... "Advanced Flanking Theory", by U.R. Skrood. "Fighting on the Grid", by Minnie Churse. "Moving on Diagonals", by Wun and Ahaff. Ah ha! Here it is: "Attacks of Opportunity Explained", by Ben Dover and Taye Kitt. — Rich Burlew

Durkon: You're only saying that because you don't want the world to end.

Roy: Of course I'm only saying that because I don't want the world to end. This is not an otherwise common topic of conversation . — Rich Burlew

Miko: You would stand between me and this evil murderer?

Hinjo: I'll stand between any two murderers I wish, thanks. — Rich Burlew

Hi Haley. look, I found all these free swords. They were in my spleen. — Rich Burlew

You guys go ahead, I'm just going to harvest his kidneys and I'll catch up. — Rich Burlew

You know, the first two, I probably should've seen coming. The leprechaun costume? Not so much. — Rich Burlew

Also, as a rule of thumb, if you find yourself defending your inalienable right to make someone else feel like garbage, you're on the wrong side of the argument. — Rich Burlew

I think I just had an evilgasm. — Rich Burlew

Fine! Whatever! Just be careful, my hands are still slippery with your blood. — Rich Burlew

Guards! Summon the holy kitty litter! Mr. Scruffy demands poopsies! — Rich Burlew

No way. I know acid, I've been splashed by acid several times before, and this, sir, is no acid. — Rich Burlew

thog no girly-orc, thog manly-orc who just happens to like figure skating! — Rich Burlew

Sorry, Roy, I just don't trust you enough to believe that you lied. — Rich Burlew

I know it's an artistic cliche, but every time I look at my past work, I want to projectile vomit. — Rich Burlew

You should have seen the look on your skull... — Rich Burlew

Promise me...that you'll...*cough*...you'll dispose of my body in the waste receptacles...conveniently located by the theater exits... — Rich Burlew

You told me that it would be better to find family among people who were good than to try and find good among my family. — Rich Burlew

It turns out I had this huge geeky safety net out there that I didn't know about this whole time, made up of people who have been reading my comic for nine years but never contacted me. — Rich Burlew

Sacrificing minions: is there any problem it CAN'T solve? — Rich Burlew

So what? That just means I can beat him with both scrolls at the same time!! — Rich Burlew