Max Monroe Quotes & Sayings

You're like two fucking catfish, sitting at the bottom of the lake, doing fish shit and stuff. — Max Monroe

I'd make those stretchy pants my bitch. Hell, maybe I'd take a leisurely seventy-mile jog in Central Park just to make sure my twat left her mark. Gross? — Max Monroe

Kline Brooks left his new intern, Leslie, under my watchful eye while he flew out to L.A. for the day to schmooze investors and impress potential advertising clients for TapNext. I was certain she had been sent straight from Hell. The devil might as well have wrapped a big red bow around her neck and attached a note. Dear Georgie, Have fun with this one. Love, Satan I'd — Max Monroe

The world is small, baby. But love is large. Big enough that coincidence occasionally rubs elbows with opportunity. — Max Monroe

I know you're not ready to hear what I'm feeling, but just know, for me, tonight was more. It was everything. — Max Monroe

I was the classiest bitch I knew. And if I wasn't, I was definitely the Cassiest, and that was close-e-fucking-nough. "How — Max Monroe

With the way I craved her company, I planned to enroll her in the accelerated education program and keep her there until she had me mastered. — Max Monroe

Most times, even if giving your heart away ends in heartbreak, the risk was still worth it. Sometimes, that risk gives you little miracles. and sometimes, that risk gives you life lessons that allow you to grow and learn more about yourself. — Max Monroe

This vodka is delicious. Not very strong, though." "That's because it's water." "Hmmmph. — Max Monroe

Every woman I'd ever known had two sets of memories: the one they wanted to remember and the one their heart wouldn't let them forget. The first kind were chosen, mostly positive and personality building, but the second would live on forever, despite age and fatigue and life-stealing diseases like dementia and Alzheimer's. Coded on the heart like a hard drive, the feelings never vanished. — Max Monroe

Translation: Total hipster. Although insanely good-looking, this guy would probably end up an NYC transplant in Portland within the next year. But I wasn't ruling out seeing his gorgeous mug on one of my favorite Instagram accounts, Hot Dudes Reading. Because who doesn't love seeing man candy nose deep in a book? My — Max Monroe

Don't worry, honey," he said, his lips mere inches from mine. "We're on the same page." "But how do you know?" I asked. "What if we're not even reading the same fucking book?" "Because I know." His mouth quirked up at the corners as a confident smile took over his lips. "We're on the same word, in the same paragraph, on the same page, in the same fantastic fucking book." "But how do you know?" "Because it's our book, Cassie. Yours and mine. This is our story, and I'll be damned if I let it end badly. — Max Monroe

Or you can get some tits and go in there and demand a re-do." "A — Max Monroe

First rule of life: the woman always goes first. Through doors, into orgasm, and in this case, crumbling to the pressure in a battle of wills. "Fuck — Max Monroe

But, Georgie, you work for a company that specializes in an app called TapNext, not the White House." After a brief beat of silence, we laughed at the same time, and I raised one eyebrow in question. "You're comparing TapNext to the White House?" "You're right," she agreed. "Bad analogy. There's probably more dick pics there. — Max Monroe

Some days, adulting was too much responsibility. Get up for work. Brush your hair. Pay bills. It was an endless list of too many things and not enough time. The struggle was real, my friends. But — Max Monroe

Oh no, I think Boobear is hurt." It took some serious thinking, but I finally decoded the mystery. "Do you mean Boudmare?" "Yeah, that's him. His nickname is Boobear." "The commentators are calling him Boobear?" I asked, fighting a smile. "No, I nicknamed him Boobear. He looks like a giant teddy bear. He's so cute!" "Oh, dear God," Thatch groaned. "Oh, — Max Monroe

Most people never know more than a surface layer of each other's personalities. They take the bolder characteristics of a first impression at face value because they're lazy, and they carry those expectations and prejudices throughout the entire relationship. — Max Monroe

But how do you know?" "Because it's our book, Cassie. Yours and mine. This is our story, and I'll be damned if I let it end badly." I — Max Monroe

His blue eyes twinkled like actual glitter. Like he went to Michael's, got a jar of it, and then poured it in his irises. "Ohhh, — Max Monroe

Yes, just like that. Christ, baby, when you catch fire, you motherfucking burn." Hot — Max Monroe

I clutched at my chest with both hands in a pathetic attempt to ease the discomfort. Or maybe I was just trying to prevent myself from bleeding out from the wounds his words had caused because any good doctor knew they needed pressure to stanch the flow — Max Monroe

My heart in your hands and you in my arms, that's all I'll ever need. — Max Monroe

Motherhood changed you from the second you looked into the big, innocent eyes of your child. Within an instant, you had an unlimited supply of love for that precious, tiny being. They would forever be yours, and you would forever be the one person who would always love them, protect them, cherish them, worry about them, and fight for them.
Everything else felt minor in comparison. — Max Monroe

If I was a bird, Kline Brooks could go fuck himself. — Max Monroe

Sent. Think you can mess with me? Think again, honey. Student, meet teacher. — Max Monroe

I might as well have offered up my vagina to the Museum of Natural History. Surely, it would be shown in the fossils display. I could already picture it, right beside Tyrannosaurus Rex's teeth. The Last Virginal Vagina in New York. Georgia Cummings 1990-2080 Died happily in her Chelsea apartment, surrounded by all sixteen of her tabby cats. — Max Monroe

couldn't help but think, if I only made bad decisions for the rest of my life, at least I had made one really good decision with her. — Max Monroe

Reed This:Sometimes people can be at two ends of a line and end up next to one another.Because intimacy and love-they're powerful enough to curve that line into a circle. — Max Monroe

What am I gonna do with me?" she whispered. "So lost in you. — Max Monroe

She shrugged. There were no fucks for her to give. Absolutely zero. I wouldn't have been surprised if she'd turned her pockets inside out just to prove it to me. — Max Monroe

Therefore, my snooze button was ridden hard and put away extremely wet. Every — Max Monroe

Good morning, lovely Meryl." She clicked her tongue. "You better find some other roll to butter up, Mr. Brooks. It may be early, but my allowance of saturated fats is all used up for the day. — Max Monroe

I wasn't looking for someone who was perfect, just someone who perfectly affected me. — Max Monroe

Isn't she gorgeous, Ken?"
"Too pretty for Thatch, that's for damn sure.," Ken remarked with a smurk. "Seriously, Cassie? Is he blackmailing you? Do we need to alert the authorities? Blink twice if he kidnapped you. Three times if you fear for you life. — Max Monroe

I couldn't help myself. This woman whom I'd seen handle an entire boardroom full of cocky sons of bitches without batting an eye was crazy adorable. She was tough as nails and hotter than sin. And Christ, she was hilarious. I wanted more of her. A lot fucking more. — Max Monroe

Oh, my God!" I covered my mouth with my hand as a shocked gasp escaped my lungs. "What if he becomes desperate, Kline? What if he has no other choice but to start prostituting himself for food? You know he's not good at making new friends! There's no way he's been accepted by the good crowd. He's probably already addicted to heroin!" "Georgie, — Max Monroe

We were all well-off, grown-as-fuck men, but you'd be surprised by how similar we were to a group of teenage girls sometimes. "And — Max Monroe