Joshua Harris Quotes & Sayings

You are so amazed by grace, you're not picking a fight with anyone, you're just crying tears of amazement that should lead to a heart for lost people, that God does indeed save, when he doesn't have to save anybody. — Joshua Harris

Purity consists of more than remaining a virgin. — Joshua Harris

But remember, continuing a wrong relationship only increases the pain when it finally does end. — Joshua Harris

During courtship, guarding each other's purity and refraining from intimacy are the acts of lovemaking. — Joshua Harris

True love isn't expressed in passionately whispered words an intimate kiss or a embrace; before two people are married, love is expressed in self-control, patience, even words left unsaid. — Joshua Harris

A defining reality for me is what Scripture teaches in Hebrews 12, that God is our father, and that a sign that he loves us is that he disciplines us, he takes us through hardship to build character in us that could not be shaped apart from difficulty. — Joshua Harris

The most romantic things a man can do for a woman are the little things that let her know that she's on his mind and in his heart. — Joshua Harris

First we must understand that all of the world's deceptions flow from the belief that love is primarily for the fulfillment and comfort of the self. The world poisons love by focusing first and foremost on meeting one's own needs.
Christ taught that love is not for the fulfillment of the self but for the Glory of God and the food of others. True love is selfless. It gives; it sacrifices; it dies to its own needs. — Joshua Harris

If you're not ready to consider marriage or you're not truly interested in marrying a specific person, it's selfish and potentially harmful to encourage that person to need you or ask him or her to gratify you emotionally or physically. — Joshua Harris

I'm not saying dating is sinful, and I'm not saying a guy and a girl should never spend time alone together. I'm saying let's wait until we can be purposeful, so there's a reason behind our relationship, and we're not just stirring up passion for the sake of a good time. — Joshua Harris

Romance says, ' I want it now!'. Wisdom urges patience — Joshua Harris

Living to glorify God means doing everything ...
for Him,
His way,
to point to His greatness
and to reflect His goodness. — Joshua Harris

As I see it, dating is a product of our entertainment-driven, disposable-everything American culture ... Love and romance became things people could solely enjoy for their recreational value. — Joshua Harris

If you're not ready to get married, don't grab at a relationship.
Patiently wait for the right time to start one that can eventually lead to marriage.
If you're ready for marriage and you're in a relationship,
don't let impatience cause you to rush.
Take your time.
Enjoy where God has the two of you right now. — Joshua Harris

He chose to love us. He chose to lay down His life for us. The danger of believing that you "fall in love" is that it also means you can "fall out of love" just as unexpectedly. Aren't you glad that God's love for us isn't as unpredictable? — Joshua Harris

God's purpose for the Christian's involvement in the church was radically different from my gas-station approach. The church wasn't merely a place to swing by for a fill-up. The journey of the Christian faith was supposed to be made with other believers. The church isn't a gas station, I realized. It's the bus I'm supposed to be traveling on. — Joshua Harris

The world takes us to a silver screen on which flickering images of passion and romance play, and as we watch, the world says, "This is love." God takes us to the foot of a tree on which a naked and bloodied man hangs and says, "This is love. — Joshua Harris

The irony of their impatience is that only by learning to wait, and by a willingness to accept the bad with the good, do we usually attain those things that are truly worthwhile. — Joshua Harris

A bagel shop isn't the most romantic spot to tell a girl you like her. But that night romance wasn't the priority. Our time there wasn't intended to be mushy. I didn't propose marriage or say I was madly in love with her, and she didn't swoon.
What I did tell her was that through our friendship I'd grown to respect her. — Joshua Harris

Every relationship for a Christian is an opportunity to love another person like God has loved us. — Joshua Harris

What would make someone a perfect mate for you? — Joshua Harris

You get up and you preach a sermon and people walk away thinking what a great guy - and that's a failure as a pastor. Our job is to proclaim Christ. — Joshua Harris

The right thing at the wrong tme is the wrong thing. — Joshua Harris

A lot of us have developed a diet mentality toward lust. We really want to cut back on lust because we know its not healthy and it makes us feel bad. But like some rich, calorie-laden chocolate dessert, lust is just too tasty to resist completely. Surely God will understand if we break our diet and nibble a little lust now and then. — Joshua Harris

The joy of intimacy is the reward of commitment. — Joshua Harris

Wisdom in relationships involves a selfless desire to do what's best for the other person. — Joshua Harris

No matter where we are today or what mistakes we've made in the past, He has given us everything we need to glorify Him right now. — Joshua Harris

If Jesus loves the church, you and I should, too. We can't use the excuse that the church has messed up too many times or that we're disillusioned. Jesus is the only person who has the right to disown and give up on the church. But He never has. And He never will. — Joshua Harris

True purity, however, is a direction, a persistent, determined pursuit of righteousness. This direction starts in the heart, and we express it in a lifestyle that flees opportunities for compromise. — Joshua Harris

Do you see a theme emerging? Women like flowers; men like food! — Joshua Harris

I've come to see that you can limit God is different ways. You can limit Him by thinking he can never work in spectacular ways. But you can also limit Him by thinking that only the spectacular is meaningful."
- from "Dug Down Deep — Joshua Harris

God will make right all that is wrong, He will take away the lingering effect of sin and what's not right in our lives. He knows how painful life in this world can be. — Joshua Harris

The technology for a clothing printer exists but is not packaged in a form that would be suitable for consumer use. With the future potential of printing technology, an at-home clothing printer is a definite possibility. Our challenge was to define the experience. — Joshua Harris

God's true love pretty much nullifies dating as we know it ...
It seems that dating as we have come to know it doesn't really prepare us for marriage; instead it can be a training ground for divorce. We cannot practice life-long commitment in a series of short-term relationships. — Joshua Harris

When you let God be God you can let humans be humans. When we place God in His rightful place in our lives, we don't struggle so much when human relationships let us down. — Joshua Harris

Terms don't define our lives; our lives define our terms. — Joshua Harris

I am a sucker for romance and I love girls and that is a terrible combination, because romance has the ability to overwhelm your perspective. — Joshua Harris

The best relationships are between two people who care more about each other's good than their own momentary pleasure. — Joshua Harris

Don't concern yourself with being right in others' eyes. And don't secretly hope that their lives will fall apart so that your opinion will be vindicated. Instead, concentrate on obeying God in your own life and, when possible, helping others to obey Him as well. You don't have to prove others wrong to continue on the course you know God has shown you. — Joshua Harris

If you want to grow, find men who provoke you. — Joshua Harris

I won't stick around to see how much temptation I can take. God is not impressed with my ability to stand up to sin. He is more impressed by the obedience I show when I run from it. — Joshua Harris

The right thing at a wrong time is a wrong thing. — Joshua Harris

When we define our happiness by some point in the future, it will never arrive. We'll keep waiting until tomorrow. If we allow impatience to govern us, we will miss the gift of the moment. We'll arrive at that point in time we expected to provide fulfillment and find it lacking. — Joshua Harris

Jesus is calling the bluff of the religious. He says, why play this game? Why call me Lord as if you care who I am or what I want when you don't bother really knowing me or doing what I say? And then Jesus tells the story about the builders and their two houses. The homes they build represent their lives
their beliefs, convictions, aspirations, and choices.
Jesus is telling us that there are stable and unstable foundations on which to construct our lives. Regardless of our intentions, it's possible to base our confidence and trust
the very footing of our lives
on what is insecure and faulty. On shifting sand. — Joshua Harris

We express true love in obedience to God and service to others- not reckless or selfish behavior- and we choose these behaviors. — Joshua Harris

Having a girlfriend was no longer my greatest need. Knowing and obeying Him was . I wanted to please Him in my relationships even if it meant looking radical and foolish to other people - even if it meant kissing dating goodbye. — Joshua Harris

Dating now is a lot like going shopping when you don't have any money. Even if you find the right thing, you can't do anything about it. — Joshua Harris

The thing about relationships is, when you are in the middle of one, they consume your focus. — Joshua Harris

Are you quick to listen? Listening is an expression of humility and genuine concern for others. ... .If we want to truly know and understand other people, we have to care what they feel and think, not arrogantly assume that we already know. — Joshua Harris

We want to stay on the straight and narrow path and serve God, yet we continue a practice that often pulls us in the wrong direction. — Joshua Harris

Instead of rushing foolishly into a marriage because of impatience or one day looking back at our season of singleness with regret, let's commit to using our singleness to its fullest potential. Singleness is a gift. Let's rejoice in it and enjoy its opportunities today. Let's practice trusting God by pursuing His kingdom and His righteousness with all our hearts and by leaving the planning to Him. — Joshua Harris

For Christians typical dating can often be a swerver - an approach to relationships that wants to go in a different direction than the one God has for us. — Joshua Harris

Purity doesn't happen by accident; it requires obedience to God. — Joshua Harris

Be like Josiah. When our lives disagree with the Word of God. I want to say, This Word is true, and I must change. — Joshua Harris

Many couples have made commitments to sexual purity, but instead of adopting a lifestyle that supports this commitment, they continue relationships that encourage physical expression and place themselves in dangerous settings. The path you take with your feet should never contradict the conviction of your heart. — Joshua Harris

How rare it is, even among Christians, for a person to say I was wrong. I sinned, and I'm fully responsible. My sinful desires motivated me, and what I did dishonored God and hurt you. Please forgive me. — Joshua Harris

Look for, and work on becoming, a man or woman who, as a single, seeks God wholeheartedly, putting Him before anything else. Don't worry about impressing the opposite sex. Instead, strive to please and glorify God. Along the way you'll catch the attention of people with the same priorities. — Joshua Harris

What we say we believe makes very little difference until we act on our belief — Joshua Harris

Intimacy without commitment, like icing without cake, can be sweet, but it ends up making us sick. — Joshua Harris

When God knows you're ready for the responsibility of commitment, He'll reveal the right person under the right circumstances. — Joshua Harris

Sex is not the problem [Lust is] — Joshua Harris

She began to notice his servant's heart, his humility, and his leadership. This attraction felt different from her prior experiences of liking guys. "Before it had always been, 'Here's the guy I want!' But this time I thought, 'Here's a man I could follow. — Joshua Harris

Our hearts lie. Something can 'feel' right and be completely wrong. — Joshua Harris

The late Curt Cobain captured the attitude of today's culture with the line, "Here we are; now entertain us." I believe that, unfortunately, many Christians have made Cobain's line the refrain of their friendships.
In my opinion, our cultural obsession with entertainment is really just an expression of selfishness. The focus in entertainment is not producing something useful for the benefit of others but consuming something for the pleasure of self. And a friendship based on this self-serving, pleasure-seeking mind-set can easily slip into a similarly self-serving romantic relationship that meets the needs of the moment.
But when we shift our relationship orientation from entertainment to service, our friendships move from a focus on ourselves to a focus on the people we can serve. And here's the punch line: In service we find true friendship. In service we can know our friends in a deeper way than ever before. — Joshua Harris

I'm looking for someone who will light candles, not just curse the darkness. — Joshua Harris

I won't pretend that I've arrived at humble orthodoxy. When I gain a bit of theological knowledge, I all too frequently get puffed up with pride. But I'll tell you what deflates my arrogance and self-righteousness faster than anything else: trying to live whatever truth I have. — Joshua Harris

If you ant to feel deeply, you have to think deeply. Too often we separate the two. We assume that if we want to feel deeply, then we need to sit around and, well, feel. But emotion built on emotion is empty. True emotion- emotion that is reliable and does not lead us astray- is always a response to reality, to truth. — Joshua Harris

God gave people 2 ears and 1 mouth because He wants us to listen twice as much as we talk. — Joshua Harris

One of my defining beliefs is that Jesus Christ has taken all of my guilt before God, and that he has been raised from the dead. That gives incredible hope and meaning to every day of my life - that nothing done in this world is wasted when it's done for him and his glory, and that there will be a day of justice and reward for the entire world. — Joshua Harris

Lord, help me to appreciate this woman/man without elevating her/him above you in my heart. Help me to remember that nobody can ever take your place in my life. You are my strength, my hope, my joy, and my ultimate reward. Bring me back to reality, God. Give me an undivided heart. — Joshua Harris

Just because something is good doesn't mean we should pursue it right now. We have to remember that the right thing at the wrong time is the wrong thing. — Joshua Harris

Women need to remember that if nature has made them plain, grace can make them beautiful, and if nature has made them beautiful, good deeds can add to their beauty. Grace will make you beautiful and will attract truly godly men to you. Make godliness and inward beauty your priority. — Joshua Harris

When you dress and behave in a way that is designed primarily to arouse sexual desire in men, you are committing pornography with your life. — Joshua Harris

Romantic love is the kite that catches the wind and tenaciously heads for the sky;
wisdom is the string that tugs downward, holding it back — Joshua Harris

In the past, the starting point of my relationships was what I
wanted instead of what God wanted. I looked out for my needs and
fit others into my agenda. Did I find fulfillment? No, I found only
compromise and heartache. I not only hurt others; I also hurt myself,
and most seriously, I sinned against God. — Joshua Harris

The doctrine of Scripture teaches us about the authority of God's Word. Scripture must be the final rule of faith and practice for our lives. Not our feelings or emotions. Not signs or prophetic words or hunches. — Joshua Harris

True love waits, but not just for sex. It waits for the right time to commit to God's brand of love - unwavering, unflagging, and totally committed. — Joshua Harris

The common error today is to bring God so close that we strip Him of His "godness." We think we have him figured out. So God becomes our pal, our buddy, our Divine Butler."
from "Dug Down Deep — Joshua Harris

Just because lips have met doesn't mean hearts have joined. And just because two bodies are drawn to each other doesn't mean two people are right for each other. A physical relationship does not equal love. — Joshua Harris

Courtship is a commitment -
it's a promise not to play games with another person's heart. — Joshua Harris

I've come to learn that theology matters. It matters not because we want to impress people, but because what we know about God shapes the way we think and live. Theology matters because if we get it wrong then our whole life will be wrong. — Joshua Harris