John Stoltenberg Quotes & Sayings

They have sex. They do not have a sex. In their erotic lives, they are not required to act out their status in a category system - because there is no category system. There are no sexes to belong to, so sex between creatures is free to be between genuine individuals - not representatives of a category. They have sex. They do not have a sex. — John Stoltenberg

But the idea of an Aryan race could never become metaphysically true, despite all the violence unleashed to create it, because there simply is no Aryan race. There is only the idea of it - and the consequences of trying to make it seem real. The male sex is very like that. — John Stoltenberg

If you look at all the variables in nature that are said
to determine human "sex," you can't possibly find one that will unequivocally split the species into two. Each of the so-called criteria of sexedness is itself a continuum - including chromosomal variables, genital and gonadal variations,
reproductive capacities, endocrinological proportions, and any other criterion you could think of. Any or all of these different variables may line up in any number of ways, and all of the variables may vary independently of one another. — John Stoltenberg

Pornography tells lies about women. But pornography tells the truth about men. — John Stoltenberg

Insistence on having a sexual orientation in sex is about defending the status quo, maintaining sex differences and the sexual hierarchy; whereas resistance to sexual orientation, regimentation is more about where we need to be going. — John Stoltenberg

Pornography also eroticizes male supremacy. It makes dominance and subordination feel like sex; it makes hierarchy feel like sex; it makes force and violence feel like sex; it makes hate and terrorism feel like sex; it makes inequality feel like sex. Pornography keeps sexism sexy. It keeps sexism necessary for some people to have sexual feelings. It makes reciprocity make you go limp. It makes mutuality leave you cold. It makes tenderness and intimacy and caring make you feel like you're going to disappear into a void. It makes justice the opposite of erotic; it makes injustice a sexual thrill. — John Stoltenberg

Our very sexual identities are artifices and illusions, the result of a lifetime of striving. — John Stoltenberg