John Ringo Quotes & Sayings

There is a god somewhere that is angry because we're combining stuff like Cutty Sark with fifty-year-old Laphroaig, — John Ringo

You really should do some research for a change instead of just listening to the voices in your head. — John Ringo

Toilet paper is a right, not a privilege, — John Ringo

Well, if I use Hispanic culture I get corruption and really good salsa music. If I use Chinese culture I get rigid thinking and decent Szechwan. If I use Islamic culture I get ... not damned much of anything. And ditto for Africa although at least the rhythm is good and you can dance to it. But if I use Western European Culture I get industry, higher standards of living, longer lifespans and a generally happier society. Damn, I think I'll just have to go with WesternCiv even if I do have to put up with the Lutherans. — John Ringo

The United States started to go downhill when it changed from a round designed to kill the enemies of our glorious republic to one designed to piss them off," Faith said, shooting a zombie five times, then walking up and shooting the still-thrashing infected in the head. "Seriously, just die, okay? — John Ringo

Good to see you, Ty," Steve said. "Welcome to Phantom Works." "Shhhh . . ." Tyler said. "Somebody might hear!" "There's a sign," Steve pointed out. — John Ringo

This is what you get for letting rednecks play with antimatter, boss — John Ringo

She wasn't sure if she could just stand there. It was much easier to walk around and be shouty. — John Ringo

We need to put your sister in a glass case like Snow White," Colonel Hamilton said, his arms crossed. He was monitoring the radio chatter from the deck of a gunboat. "With a sign on it that says 'Break in the event of a zombie apocalypse.' — John Ringo

The purpose of a free press, in which I believe believe it or not, is so that people can make rational decisions in a democracy. They'd already perverted the process so bad that was hard, but the point is valid. — John Ringo

Humans talk about 'fight-flight.' Isn't binary, quaternary: fight, flight, bluff, submit. Every human is different pattern for different conditions, but all humans have all four to an extent ... All human interaction works on those four responses ... — John Ringo

Keep moving forward until we find something better to do," Hinchcliffe replied. "Maybe find the nursery for the dog-demons. I'd rather kill them stillborn." "I didn't know you were a Democrat, Staff Sergeant," Berg said with a grin. "Don't ask, don't tell, Two-Gun. — John Ringo

Islam was really strict about the whole "premarital sex" thing. The penalty for being raped, not for the rapist but for the girl who was raped, was stoning. Generally the family of the rapist paid a nominal fee and it was all good. Rape was, in fact, a way of exacting punishment on someone in (really backward) Islamic societies. — John Ringo

Peace through superior firepower. — John Ringo

I have been to the speed of God, sir ... and I discommend it. — John Ringo

Rich tofu-eaters would move out to the country, buy a small farm that was going under anyway and then not know what to do with it. (See Green Acres and multiply by hundreds of thousands and both members Eva Gabor. But crossed with Karen Carpenter and take away all shreds of common sense.) — John Ringo

To most people in a bureaucracy, the main thing is that they've got a steady paycheck, because who ever lays off a bureaucrat? — John Ringo

I am in an undisclosed location. I call it . . . the Laaaair." "The Lair?" Steve said, laughing. "Hey, every Evil Overlord has to have a lair," Tyler said. "I couldn't find a volcano next to a piranha pit but it's close . . . — John Ringo

Nuke them until they glow and shoot them in the dark.
No questions. — John Ringo

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old: Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn. At the going down of the sun and in the morning, We will remember them. "Ode of Remembrance" Lawrence Binyon — John Ringo

Triage on a battlefield (where the word originated in the Napoleonic Wars) came down to three choices: Those that don't need help right now, those that can survive if they get help right now and those that are probably going to die whether they get help or not. — John Ringo

Open-market democratic capitalism isn't the best system of government in the world, it just works the best. — John Ringo

It is said that in science the greatest changes come about when some researcher says "Hmmm. That's odd." The same can be said for relationships: "That's not my shade of lipstick . . ." - warfare: "That's an odd dust cloud . . ." Etc. — John Ringo

Creating lines that went straight into the interior [of a space station] was a recipe for disaster. Some knucklehead in an X-wing was bound to come along and drop an energy torpedo into your main power plant, and everyone knows how that ends. — John Ringo

Zombies don't bother me, sir," Faith said, dimpling cutely. "They're insane, hungry, angry animals. They won't kill me from professional courtesy, sir. — John Ringo

over the items and he tied — John Ringo

I AM SICK AND TIRED OF THESE MOTHERFUCKING ZOMBIES ON THIS MOTHERFUCKING . . ." She screamed at the top of her lungs. — John Ringo

This is too complicated. What about I shoot him? If he comes back, he really likes me. — John Ringo

That's the way to get the chicks for free. And getting the chicks for free is the only true pursuit for a grown-up male. Before puberty, of course, it's avoiding them like the plague. — John Ringo

Away Team, Guppy. Yes, we can." "If you would, please," Sophia radioed. "Nuke 'em from orbit. It's the only way to be sure. — John Ringo

The economic answer to the world's problems is John Adams, not [Karl] Marx. — John Ringo

Is it just me or is this like a bad TV sci-fi show? — John Ringo

Son, We're in no mood for Mickey Mouse. Get out of the road.
Chief Miller, Into the Looking Glass — John Ringo

Team Inara, commence Operation Joss-Whedon-Is-A-God. — John Ringo

Freedom is not free, but the U.S. Marine Corps will pay most of your share. — John Ringo

[Virginia] has a very sizeable collection of democrats, liberals and moonbats. (Yes, they can be separated.) — John Ringo

So the starting point and the basis of their liberal wails of anguish always and always is guilt. Guilt, guilt, guilt. — John Ringo

Man-induced global warming was an hypothesis that had been repeatedly disproven. Anthropogenic (man-caused) global warming proponents weren't scientists, they were religious zealots. — John Ringo

If you don't tell people your plans they can't follow along." "They don't follow along anyway," Tyler said. "Most of them do their level best to piss in your well just to piss in your well. — John Ringo

Tyler said, taking a sip of Coke. He'd begun to notice a bit too much blood in his alcohol system lately. — John Ringo

He who laughs last is generally the one that thought fastest on his feet, — John Ringo

All the planetules and planetismals and all the rest seems to be people having to publish or perish and not having a good idea. 'Wow! I'll come up with a stupid name for stuff that's already got names!' And Pluto is a planet, damnit! Asteroid. Rocky thing. Comet. Icy thing. Nine planets. How damned hard does it have to be!" "Been trying to do research on our own, have we?" Dr. Foster said with a grin. — John Ringo

But it's pretty hard to get a liberal off their mental grooves.) — John Ringo

Nuke em till they glow and then shoot 'em in the dark — John Ringo

Hello, my name is Noam and I have the answer to all your problems. It's all the fault of the evil Americans, the bad conservative ones that fill the airwaves with their lies and are in power and want to oppress the world. There. Now give me money so that I can soothsay again and assuage your guilt. — John Ringo

Extreme zombie fighting kit. Tactical boots and tacticals. Firefighting bunker gear. Nomex head cover tucked under the collar of the bunker gear. Full face respirator. Helmet with integrated visor. Body armor with integral MOLLE. Knee, elbow and shin guards. Nitrile gloves. Tactical gloves. Rubber gloves. Assault pack with hydration unit. Saiga shotgun on friction strap rig. A .45 USP in tactical fast-draw holster. Two .45 USP in chest holsters. Fourteen Saiga ten-round 12-gauge magazines plus one in the weapon. Nine pistol magazines in holster plus three in weapons. Kukri in waist sheath. Machete in over-shoulder sheath, right. Halligan tool in over-shoulder sheath, left. Tactical knife in chest sheath. Tactical knife in waist sheath. Bowie knife in thigh sheath. Calf tactical knife times two. A few clasp knives dangling in various places. There was the head of a teddy bear peeking out of her assault pack. — John Ringo

More people have been killed by totalitarian regimes, during times of peace, than in all the wars in the world combined. — John Ringo

Shall I show him in or tell him to go find a short and unpleasant route to hell? — John Ringo

Yeah, I'm gonna need to write this . . ." Januscheitis said, pulling Faith up from where she was passed out on the computer keyboard. " '. . . it was, like, awesome . . .' is not going to pass review." "Wazzat?" Faith said. "We're going to have to talk about report writing language, ma'am," Januscheitis said, getting the lieutenant to her feet. "Tomorrow. — John Ringo