Jeffrey Steingarten Quotes & Sayings

Bad bread wrecks my outlook on life. — Jeffrey Steingarten

Subsistence, I am happy to report, is not much of a problem for me these days either. I could probably subsist for a decade or more on the food energy I have thriftily wrapped around various parts of my body. — Jeffrey Steingarten

In Valencia, when you catch snails for your paella, you feed them rosemary for a few days, both to purge them and to give them flavor. — Jeffrey Steingarten

The only thing more enjoyable than chocolate, is bacon. — Jeffrey Steingarten

As long as I can remember, male candy eaters have been ill-used, misunderstood, and denigrated, in films and on television, as weak, self-indulgent, soft, effeminate, undisciplined, and venal. Most of us have been driven underground. We eat our candy alone and on the sly. We never experience the intimacy of sharing candy with others - unless we have chosen our mates wisely. — Jeffrey Steingarten

What's so bad about addiction? I can't remember. Isn't it something about giving up your freedom? Isn't freedom an illusion? — Jeffrey Steingarten

As a leftover sixties liberal, I believe that the long arm and beady eyes of the government have no place in our bedrooms, our kitchens, or the backseats of our parked cars. But I also feel that the immediate appointment of a Special Pastry Prosecutor would do much more good than harm. We know the free market has totally failed when 89 percent of all the tart pastry, chocolate-chip cookies, and tuiles in America are far less delicious than they would be if bakers simply followed a few readily available recipes. What we need is a system of graduated fines and perhaps short jail sentences to discourage the production of totally depressing baked goods. Maybe a period of unpleasant and tedious community service could be substituted for jail time. — Jeffrey Steingarten

Whenever I travel to the South, the first thing I do is visit the best barbecue place between the airport and my hotel. An hour or two later I visit the best barbecue place between my hotel and dinner. — Jeffrey Steingarten

Whenever I have nothing better to do, I roast a chicken. — Jeffrey Steingarten

Vegetarianism is always the product of scarcity, of religion, or of ideology, including nutritional fads and fashions. — Jeffrey Steingarten

But the goal of the arts, culinary or otherwise, is not to increase our comfort. That is the goal of an easy chair. — Jeffrey Steingarten

I am reminded that while New Yorkers say "standing on line," the rest of the English-speaking world says "standing in line. — Jeffrey Steingarten

Maybe evolution is irrelevant at dinnertime. — Jeffrey Steingarten

Among the cognoscenti, though, it is not just about elaborate new flavors. I always consider the main test of ice cream to be the simple ice creams, especially vanilla. One should have fun when one eats, but it should also be seriously good. — Jeffrey Steingarten