James Patterson Quotes & Sayings

All genders?' whispered Nudge. 'Aren't there just the two'
I shrugged. 'No idea. Maybe they've created others. — James Patterson

Why did she do this to me?" I mumble. "Actually, Samuel, from my preliminary scans of your internal organs, it does not appear that our mother has done anything to you. Were you in need of repair as well? If so, I am certain she will - — James Patterson

Ce n'est pas fini jusqu'a ce que je dis c'est fini," Rampling called out. "It's not over until I say it's over. — James Patterson

The next forty-five minutes in that office was about as much fun as a day at Disney World - when it's pouring rain. And all there is to eat are hot-dog buns. And you get electrocuted on the rides. — James Patterson

I don't think of myself as a writer. — James Patterson

Yes, I have a very small and mostly nerdy fan club. And much to my amazement, it grows a little larger every day. Apparently, these new recruits liked what they saw of my act on YouTube (even though everybody wishes that doofus blocking the camera had a smaller head). — James Patterson

He wanted an heir, a tiny piece of immortality. — James Patterson

The subject for a lot of non-fiction is very emotional, but if you read it, it's the most boring, dry stuff. I wanted 'Torn Apart' to be extremely accessible and readable. — James Patterson

there, but it was some half-assed firework or — James Patterson

Gharsi's to attend the service, Emily — James Patterson

Do you like to eat things?
-I love eating. I list it as a hobby. — James Patterson

Object to that as well. The judge said, — James Patterson

It's a common enough psych term," I told him. "All of us shrinks talk about VFC when we get together. Very fucking crazy, Gerry. — James Patterson

you niggers, is when you set in to tryin' to think," said Leander Purneau. He spoke in a friendly, jokey — James Patterson

Quivering, as if she couldn't decide whether to laugh or frown. I love my mom, and I have no idea how she can find Rafe funny. It must be a gene I missed. "So, are you two excited for your first day?" Mom asked. Changing the subject. Nicely done, Mom. "I can't wait," Rafe and I said together. Only his voice clearly meant "I can wait," while my voice meant "I'm so excited that I'm about to explode! — James Patterson

The other Max looked at me, and her eyes narrowed. 'They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery,' she said snidely. 'So I guess you're really sucking up.'
'Who are you?' I gasped, my eyes wide. 'You're an impostor!'
'No she isn't.' The little creepy one, Angel, turned to look at me. Her arm was still bleeding where Ari had bitten it. 'You are.'
I swallowed my anger. Who did she think she was, her and her stupid dog? I gave a concerned smile. 'But Angel,' I said, sincerity dripping from my voice, 'how can you say that? You know who I am.'
'I think I'm Angel,' she said. 'And my dog isn't stupid. You're the stupid one, to think that you could fool us. I can read minds, you idiot. — James Patterson

Oh no! Don't drag us away from Antartica and take us to the playground of the rich and famous! Not that briar patch! -Max — James Patterson

I fell into a deep sleep tucked in that little cocoon, a deeper sleep than I might of had in years.
Right up until someone kicked me and said Gotcha! — James Patterson

I'm pretty sure that if you looked up the word "nuts" in the dictionary, you'll find my picture. Just another fun feature of my mutant-birdkid-freak package. — James Patterson

You are a fridge with wings. We're freaking ballet dancers. — James Patterson

You can call me Agent Mickelson,' he told me with a smile. 'What about you? Is Max short for something? Maxine?'
'No, Dean. It's just Max. — James Patterson

The world was becoming a zoo, without cages. — James Patterson

Somebody said the key to life is to work hard, play hard, rest hard, and I've pretty much adopted that. — James Patterson

If there's a God, he knows I'm doing the best I can. — James Patterson

Is that clear?" said Borcht "as clear as pea soup" I said — James Patterson

The Dick tells us that Denny once worked on some arson cases, but I'd wager a mortgage payment that those cases took place when you created fire by rubbing two sticks together so you could cook the stegosaurus you killed with a spear and dragged back to the cave. — James Patterson

Congratulations. The fact that you're reading this means you've taken one giant step closer to surviving until your next birthday. — James Patterson

I love you more than I love goats, and you know how I feel about goats, Gaby said. — James Patterson

may have gotten their mother killed. Mary had been right. We should screen clients before working for them. Through a line of pines, I could make out a golf club's fairway. Squeezing — James Patterson

We know," Nudge said apologetically. "It's just - she's going to make sweet potatoes with raisins and little marshmallows on top. — James Patterson

I always figured there would be a kid audience and an adult audience, and there is. That's true for 'Hunger Games' and 'Twilight' and 'Harry Potter.' And 'Maximum Ride,' for sure. In particular what happens is a lot of parents share the books with their kids, and the mom has read it, and the kids, and they talk about it. — James Patterson

But what is life if you don't live it? — James Patterson

Fang: When do I get out of here?
Max: They say a week.
Fang: So, like, tomorrow?
Max: That's what I'm thinking. — James Patterson

Is it important to be right or is it important to do what's right? That's one of the hardest lessons to learn. — James Patterson

If I could run the world, I'd find another way to treat most of these criminals - most of them, not all of them - but we find widespread solutions to widespread problems in this country, so we just build big prisons and stick everyone inside them and, for the most part, forget about them once they're gone. Noah — James Patterson

The act of laughing releases some nice chemical into your brain, you feel good and it's free. — James Patterson

The truth has always been far too dangerous for the public to know. The truth didn't usually set people free, it just got them crazier. Most people just couldn't handle the truth. — James Patterson

you...are...a...frige...with...wings...we...are...freaking...ballet...dancers! — James Patterson

You're the most stubborn person I've ever met, and sometimes it seems like your sole purpose in life is to make mine harder, but I swear, I love you more than I thought I could love anyone. — James Patterson

Isn't it funny how just changing your location changes your perspective? — James Patterson

Ever hear of anyone falling — James Patterson

Even if they didn't win the battle, even if she couldn't save these kids, Angel knew, as she'd always known, that Max was their only chance at saving the world. — James Patterson

Iggy nodded. "I'm bummed we couldn't use Big Boy," he said. "But I don't want to waste it. We have to actually see them first. I mean, you do."
"Maybe tomorrow," the Gasman said encouragingly. "We'll go see what havoc we've wreaked."
"Wrought. — James Patterson

in Staten Island. It — James Patterson

In this family, we always celebrate each other's birthdays. I don't care if you're four or fourteen or forty and scattered around the world. We gotta stick by each other, okay? And meals- as long as you live under the same roof, you have at least one meal a day together. I don't care if it's a dreaded hot dog in front of the dastardly TV as long as you're all there. -Maeve Bennett — James Patterson

As a maternal figure, I always try to keep the flock safe, of course. But I admit, it did my heart proud to see the instant blood-lust pop into Gazzy's blue eyes and to see little Angel automatically tense up and get into fighting stance, ready to rip someone's head off. They were just so - so dang adorable, sometimes. — James Patterson

Max?" said the Gasman. "Are those, um, rats?"
Lovely. "Yes, those do appear to be either rats or mice on steroids," I said briskly, trying not to shriek and climb the walls like a girly-girl. — James Patterson

He [Iggy] started reaching for things around the table, and his hand landed on Total. "You're black."
"I prefer canine-American," said Total. — James Patterson

What?" I said, suspicion starting to rise in me. "When did they start coming after you?"
"Was it - was it after the oil-slick Hummer crash?" the Gasman asked Iggy tentatively.
My eyes widened. Oil-slick Hummer crash?
Iggy rubbed his chin, thinking.
"Or maybe it was more - after the bomb," the Gasman said in a low voice, looking down.
"I think it was the bomb," Iggy agreed. "That definitely seemed to tick them off. — James Patterson

It is said that politics is the second-oldest profession in the world but that it bears a close resemblance to the oldest," said — James Patterson

I recommend you stick to your own species, Shy Babe. p. 155 — James Patterson

Once told me this thing about brain chemistry, the nub of it being that when you're feeling good, you can't ever imagine feeling bad again. And when you're feeling bad, it's impossible to imagine a time when you won't be circling the drain. — James Patterson

You know the pop is coming, but damn if it don't always surprise you. — James Patterson

They turned to Angel. "We will call you Little One," the leader said, obviously deciding to dispense with the whole confusing name thing.
"Okay," said Angel agreeably. "I'll call you Guy in a White Lab Coat." He frowned.
"That can be his Indian name," I suggested. — James Patterson

What did that stupid deserting crap-bag ex-boyfriend, ex-best friend with the most perfect stupid hair do? He DIDN'T delete his crap off the desktop before he fled my life and left me all alone. That's what he did. — James Patterson

I moved to leave, and Dylan actually grabbed me by my shoulders. I was so surprised that I forgot to karate-chop his elbows and break his arms. — James Patterson

It's wherever you are. If it's tapped into any of your senses, it knows where you are and what you're doing."
Oh no, I thought, my spirits sinking. I hadn't considered that. Did that mean nothing I did was ever anymore?
"Even in the bathroom?" the Gasman's eyes widened with surprise. — James Patterson

want the world to know how I felt about her. But now — James Patterson

Look, I guess it's natural, you're teenagers, its springtime,everyone's thoughts are turning to birds and bees and caterpillars and moths ...
- Iggy — James Patterson

I'm magnetic," she whispered, half awed and half horrified.
"I hope you don't start sticking to fridges and stuff," I said in disbelief.
Fang dropped down next to me, and the Gasman joined us, squishing in next to Nudge.
"What's going on?" Fang asked.
"I'm Magnet Girl!" Nudge said, already coming to terms with her new skill. — James Patterson

Well, I get under people's skins. It's a gift I have, what can I say? — James Patterson

Let's face it: Most of us don't realize it, but we are failing our kids as reading role models. The best role models are in the home: brothers, fathers, grandfathers; mothers, sisters, grandmothers. Moms and dads, it's important that your kids see you reading. Not just books - reading the newspaper is good, too. — James Patterson

I dumped half a cup of green tea into the sink. To hell with my chakras. I needed coffee. — James Patterson

We all love each other, Ange," I said impatiently, hating this whole conversation. "No, not like this," she went on relentlessly. "Fang loves you." ... My mouth dropped open. How does she know this stuff? "Forget it! No one's getting married!" I hissed. "Not in New Hampshire or anywhere else! Not in a box, not with a fox! Now go to sleep, before I kill you! Oh yeah, like I got any sleep after that. - pg 35 — James Patterson

It was a little weird that they were friends. But then, maybe freaks just tended to find each other. — James Patterson

I can talk to fish!" Angel said happily, water dripping off her long, skinny body. "Ask one over for dinner," Fang said, joining us. — James Patterson

Main Street along this road, the white-trimmed — James Patterson

I had to give him props, but how annoying of him to be a hero when I was trying so hard to dislike him. It was downright selfish. — James Patterson

What was premeditated murder if not calculated leverage? — James Patterson

Jeb had always said to think with your brain, not your emotions. He'd been right, as usual. So I put all my feelings in a box and locked it. — James Patterson

Like we were just jagged puzzle pieces that made no sense alone but together we fit perfectly. That's what life is supposed to be like for normal people right? You find that other piece that matches yours that completes yours. And you make the jags and the crevices fit, even if they don't go in perfectly smooth, even if they require a few adjustments. You don't demand perfection you make it work and appreciate the parts that fit instead of obsessing about the small angles that don't. — James Patterson

You're a diabolical little pyro, aren't you?
He blushed modestly. — James Patterson

I stared at her in amazement. "How do you even live with yourself?" ... "You're willing to sell children to a foreign government so they can be used as weapons, possibly against other Americans. I don't get it. Were you hiding behind a door on morals and ethics day? ... You couldn't mother someone if they shot five gallons of estrogen into your veins. — James Patterson

It was so cold outside that a lawyer would have his hands in his own pockets. — James Patterson

aunt Bela would be most pleased." "Wait a second," I said. "You know Bela Kilgore?" The man in the fez smiled. "Oh, yes, Kidd — James Patterson

Do you love me?" James asked suddenly
"Yes. I do." I didn't even have to think about it. It was so freeing
"I love you, too," he replied. "I've never said that to anyone before."
It was so hard to believe. "Really?"
He grinned and gazed out the window. "Well, except my first motorcycle, Ramona. But she was a Ducati, so you can blame me. In fact, I think I might have loved her more than I love you."
I punched James in the spot between his chest and shoulder. — James Patterson

It was called Operation Coitus Interruptus, which only goes to prove that there are some people in the FBI with a sense of humor. — James Patterson

Advanced life-forms, my seweet patootie. Jerks. Both of them. — James Patterson

Attack of the Kitchen Appliances! — James Patterson

HAC: Human-Animal Conflict. — James Patterson

But ... if everyone was special, wouldn't that really mean that no one was special at all? — James Patterson

What is a lie? It's a distortion of reality, presented as reality. — James Patterson

Men suck, even imaginary ones — James Patterson

Waiting in hospitals is as close as we get to being in hell before our time, — James Patterson

Some kids get called 'bundles of joy' or 'slices of heaven' or 'dreams come true.' We got 'the fifty-fourth generation of DNA experiments.' Doesn't have the same warm and fuzzy feel. But maybe I'm oversensitive. — James Patterson

I offered to pee on him, but they said no — James Patterson

Later, Fang said to Ella and Dr. Martinez in that gushy, hyperemotional, overdramatic way he has. — James Patterson

He and I have history; — James Patterson

Ms. D. through the front door and up to the main office, where the interview — James Patterson

My anxiety level was rising pretty fast now. Visits with the FBI can do that to you, I guess. I'd had bad experiences with them before. Ironically, so had Kit. They're good people, mostly, but something got screwed up along the way. I guess that's what happen when J. Edgar Hoover is your daddy. Talk about the road to perdition. — James Patterson

Gazzy: "What does that mean?" (points to metal plaque warning to stay off the third rail that said Stay off the third rail!)
Fang: "It means the third rail has seven hundred volts of direct current running through it. Touch it and you're human popcorn. — James Patterson

You must create a plan that highlights your strengths and hides your flaws. — James Patterson

Whenever Maeve would mention another foster case or needy child she'd heard about and say, What's another pound on an elephant? — James Patterson

Something like this changes you,
it breaks you into pieces and puts you back together, but the sum total is different. — James Patterson

He could totally be your boyfriend," [Angel] went on with annoying persistance. "You guys could get married. I could be like a junior bridesmaid. Total could be your flower dog."
"I'm only a kid!" I shrieked. "I can't get married!"
"You could in New Hampshire."
My mouth dropped open. How does she know this stuff? "Forget it! No one's getting married!" I hissed. "Not in New Hampshire or anywhere else! Not in a box, not with a fox! Now go to sleep, before I kill you! — James Patterson

We kissed and pressed against each other and it seemed as if we were merging, getting closer and closer. I loved the touch of her mouth against mine, the feel of her body, the way we fit. We were both strong, and yet we could be gentle together. I passionately believe in soul mates. I guess I always have. The best thing I had ever done in my life was to be in love. I missed it and was finally ready to love again. — James Patterson

Tara McLellan, who these men have been convicted of killing, was a colleague of mine and a very close family friend. — James Patterson

I do 30 to 40 books a year, so it's a fair amount of reading. Back and forth between nonfiction and fiction. I usually have three or four things that are open on my desk, on my bed, on audiobook in the car. — James Patterson

Talamas as she races through her — James Patterson

I took a bite of cookie and chewed. "Hmmm," I said, trying not to spit crumbs. "Clear vanilla notes, too-sweet chocolate chips, distinct flavor of brown sugar. A decent cookie, not spectacular. Still, a good-hearted cookie, not pretentious." I turned to Fang. "What say you?"
"It's fine."
Some people just don't have what it takes to appreciate a cookie. — James Patterson