Jack Handy Quotes & Sayings

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. — Jack Handy

~ "It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man. — Jack Handy

If you think a weakness can be turned into a strength, I hate to tell you this, but that's another weakness. — Jack Handy

If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let'em go...because man, they're gone! — Jack Handy

If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason. — Jack Handy

This is a dumb quote. — Jack Handy

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you'll be a mile from them, and you'll have their shoes — Jack Handy

Sometimes I think the world has gone completely mad. And then I think, "Aw, who cares?" And then I think, "Hey, what's for supper? — Jack Handy