Famous Quotes & Sayings

Chris Voss Quotes & Sayings

Enjoy the top 25 famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Chris Voss.

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Famous Quotes By Chris Voss

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NO" STARTS THE NEGOTIATION My — Chris Voss

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being right isn't the key to a successful negotiation - having the right mindset is. HOW — Chris Voss

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I mean, have you ever tried to devise a mutually beneficial win-win solution with a guy who thinks he's the messiah? It — Chris Voss

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The last use of the F-word is my favorite because it's positive and constructive. It sets the stage for honest and empathetic negotiation. Here's how I use it: Early on in a negotiation, I say, "I want you to feel like you are being treated fairly at all times. So please stop me at any time if you feel I'm being unfair, and we'll address it." It's simple and clear and sets me up as an honest dealer. With that statement, I let people know it is okay to use that word with me if they use it honestly. As a negotiator, you should strive for a reputation of being fair. Your reputation precedes you. Let it precede you in a way that paves success. — Chris Voss

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Great negotiators are able to question the assumptions that the rest of the involved players accept on faith or in arrogance, and thus remain more emotionally open to all possibilities, and more intellectually agile to a fluid situation. Unfortunately, — Chris Voss

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you get what you ask for; you just have to ask correctly. — Chris Voss

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If you take a pit bull approach with another pit bull, you generally end up with a messy scene and lots of bruised feelings and resentment. Luckily, there's another way without all the mess. It's just four simple steps: 1. — Chris Voss

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Going too fast is one of the mistakes all negotiators are prone to making. — Chris Voss

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To get real leverage, you have to persuade them that they have something concrete to lose if the deal falls through. — Chris Voss

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In this world, you get what you ask for; you just have to ask correctly. So — Chris Voss

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Life is negotiation. The — Chris Voss

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In fact, "No" often opens the discussion up. The sooner you say "No," the sooner you're willing to see options and opportunities that you were blind to previously. Saying "No" often spurs people to action because they feel they've protected themselves and now see an opportunity slipping away. Since — Chris Voss

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The goal is to identify what your counterparts actually need (monetarily, emotionally, or otherwise) and get them feeling safe enough to talk and talk and talk some more about what they want. The latter will help you discover the former. Wants are easy to talk about, representing the aspiration of getting our way, and sustaining any illusion of control we have as we begin to negotiate; needs imply survival, the very minimum required to make us act, and so make us vulnerable. But neither wants nor needs are where we start; it begins with listening, making it about the other people, validating their emotions, and creating enough trust and safety for a real conversation to begin. We — Chris Voss

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Some people are Accommodators; others - like me - are basically Assertive; and the rest are data-loving Analysts. — Chris Voss

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To successfully gain a hostage's safe release, a negotiator had to penetrate the hostage-taker's motives, state of mind, intelligence, and emotional strengths and weaknesses. The negotiator played the role of bully, conciliator, enforcer, savior, confessor, instigator, and — Chris Voss

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people who had damage in the part of the brain where emotions are generated, he found that they all had something peculiar in common: They couldn't make decisions. They could describe what they should do in logical terms, but they found it impossible to make even the simplest choice. In other words, while we may use logic to reason ourselves toward a decision, the actual decision making is governed by emotion. — Chris Voss

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We've instrumentalized niceness as a way of greasing the social wheels, yet it's often a ruse. We're polite and we don't disagree to get through daily existence with the least degree of friction. But by turning niceness into a lubricant, we've leeched it of meaning. A smile and a nod might signify "Get me out of here!" as much as it means "Nice to meet you." That's — Chris Voss

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The problem is that conventional questioning and research techniques are designed to confirm known knowns and reduce uncertainty. — Chris Voss

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For anger to be effective, it has to be real, the key for it is to be under control because anger also reduces our cognitive ability. And — Chris Voss

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It's almost laughably simple: for the FBI, a "mirror" is when you repeat the last three words (or the critical one to three words) of what someone has just said. Of the entirety of the FBI's hostage negotiation skill set, mirroring is the closest one gets to a Jedi mind trick. Simple, and yet uncannily effective. By — Chris Voss

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And being "nice" in the form of feigned sympathy is often equally as unsuccessful. We live in an age that celebrates niceness under various names. We are exhorted to be nice and to respect people's feelings at all times and in every situation. But nice alone in the context of negotiation can backfire. Nice, employed as a ruse, is disingenuous and manipulative. — Chris Voss

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No" is not failure. Used strategically it's an answer that opens the path forward. — Chris Voss

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He who has learned to disagree without being disagreeable has discovered the most valuable secret of negotiation. — Chris Voss

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If you can get the other party to reveal their problems, pain, and unmet objectives - if you can get at what people are really buying - then you can sell them a vision of their problem that leaves your proposal as the perfect solution. Look at this from the most basic level. What does a good babysitter sell, really? It's not child care exactly, but a relaxed evening. A furnace salesperson? Cozy rooms for family time. A locksmith? A feeling of security. Know the emotional drivers and you can frame the benefits of any deal in language that will resonate. — Chris Voss

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Set your target price (your goal). 2. Set your first offer at 65 percent of your target price. 3. Calculate three raises of decreasing increments (to 85, 95, and 100 percent). 4. Use lots of empathy and different ways of saying "No" to get the other side to counter before you increase your offer. 5. When calculating the final amount, use precise, nonround numbers like, say, $37,893 rather than $38,000. It gives the number credibility and weight. 6. On your final number, throw in a nonmonetary item (that they probably don't want) to show you're at your limit. The — Chris Voss