Chris Gethard Quotes & Sayings

There are many hundreds of millions of people who have jobs harder than (mine), and I also remind myself of that every day. No matter how frustrating this can be, I am very lucky that I have been able to cobble together a little life, in which (comedy) is what I do. I am certainly not in danger of getting stuck in a mine anytime soon. — Chris Gethard

The world of entertainment is built for big money. It's not built for small-scale projects that sustain themselves. — Chris Gethard

If I had to give you a proper description, I would say a camel cricket is basically a cross between a grasshopper and a dragon and that its natural habitat is the nightmares of men. — Chris Gethard

People ask, why hasn't that person busted out? Almost always, at the end of it, consciously or subconsciously, it hasn't happened because that person has chosen for it to not happen. Either walking away, because it wasn't the life they wanted, or through self-sabotaging. — Chris Gethard

Growing up and being a kid, I knew that creativity was at the heart of what I wanted to do. I always had this feeling of wanting to be a comedian and wanting to be an actor. — Chris Gethard

Outside of performing, (a comedian) is someone who is analyzing life, thinking about it and trying to be observing so much. In my opinion, it can make you feel on the outside looking in. — Chris Gethard

If people tell me something is impossible, I just want to prove that. I want to know that that's for certain. I don't want to not do something because someone says I can't. — Chris Gethard

I'm not good at math. Numbers are a terrifying thing to me. My father is a whiz with money and the stock market, and he tries to explain it to me, and I find it terrifying. — Chris Gethard

I just like testing myself. I just have that thing in me. Whatever it is that people tell me I can't do, I've gotta try it. — Chris Gethard

People who get lucky, also tend to be really great looking, which is luck on some level, but it is also just the fact of the matter. — Chris Gethard

You need an immense amount of luck and perseverance to even be on the playing field for success on a grand scale. — Chris Gethard

The thing that I like about public-access is that I am often in the middle of chaos — Chris Gethard

When you try to go back and watch improv on tape, it almost never feels as good as it did when a crowd was laughing at it. — Chris Gethard

I get very jealous of my friends who have traditional families and 9-to-5 jobs, because I feel like just by the nature of being a comedian ... — Chris Gethard

You see people - maybe in a frustrating fashion - that don't get embraced, when they should. You get some people who get embraced too early, and they tend to flame out, but it's really rare that someone gets lucky. It's usually a combination of a lot of talent and a lot of hard work. — Chris Gethard

The Internet seems like a safe house for the opposite mentality, for cynics and for jerks and for people who want to lash out. And it's a valid thing. It's a valid forum and I'm not going say that they aren't valid feelings. But it's sad. Considering the potential that something like the Internet, that connects so many people, has for good. I think it's sad that it's used so often for nothing but unfounded, overzealous negativity ... — Chris Gethard

It's very interesting being an artist and a comedian, (because) you aim for jobs that will feed your ego, but when you get up to the precipice of them, you actually have to deliver. You actually have to understand that you're reaching a new level where there are way more eyes on you, way more expectations and way more pressure. — Chris Gethard

If I could have enough money that I know I could buy a house someday, and if I want to have kids, I could raise them - I don't need the money grab. I don't need to have a mansion. I just need to be creative and happy. — Chris Gethard

I'm unable to tell you what it feels like to be "a little" mad. My emotions work as if controlled by a light switch. I'm either fine or I'm out of control. I once spilled a container of thumbtacks and got as angry at myself as I did when I screwed up my relationship with my high school sweetheart. If I'm under the impression that there are Golden Grahams in my cupboard, then realize that there in fact are none, there's a high probability I'll be as sad as I was at my grandfather's funeral.

In other words, my reactions aren't in proportion to the things I'm reacting to. It's something I've been working on with a very lovely shrink for the past few years.

But against the 4Skins one day, all that hard word went out the window. — Chris Gethard

I was that kid who did every activity when I was in high school. There wasn't a day that I didn't stay after school to do something. I just had my hands in everything. And I was similarly very, very angry. I was an angry little guy. — Chris Gethard

Mania is fun. I won't lie, it's fun. But it's usually followed by a soul-crushing depression. — Chris Gethard

I think for a lot of people, the financial barrier is the biggest leap (that) you have to take. A lot of people don't want to stick their necks out and take that risk which is totally understandable. Until you are ready to totally bet on yourself and put all of your chips on the table, it doesn't happen. — Chris Gethard

If you are a New York comedian who knows how to improvise and has glasses, you're going to start getting commercials. — Chris Gethard

...beautiful things often happen, and that the most beautiful things are often simple. — Chris Gethard

The best advice I've gotten in terms of that was someone who said, "People will surprise you if you let them." — Chris Gethard

As luck would have it, I happened to have a top hat that I previously wore to my junior prom. — Chris Gethard

My therapist and I even have a joke about it: shit is truly fucked up when I start threatening to take a road trip. — Chris Gethard

I bet I'm the only person in history who went from being the star of a sitcom to the host of a public-access show in less than a year. — Chris Gethard

Many comedians - both male and female - do have an "I will never date another comedian" rule. — Chris Gethard

I think you can make good things happen if you look for them. Life is a very positive thing. — Chris Gethard

I think there is a weird loneliness that comes with being a comedian. There is something definitely inside the personality of a person who wants to be a comedian, and (he or she) is looking to connect (to the audience) at all times. — Chris Gethard