Bruce McCall Quotes & Sayings

I'm a great admirer of cartoons, because I can't do cartoons. — Bruce McCall

You can parody almost anything. — Bruce McCall

Not even Barbra Streisand celebrates herself as tirelessly as golf celebrates itself. — Bruce McCall

If the general attitude of Canadians toward their mighty neighbor to the south could be distilled into a single phrase, that phrase would probably be "Oh, shut up." The Americans talked too much, mainly about themselves. Their torrid love affair with their own history and legend exceeded-painfully-the quasi-British Canadian idea of modesty and self-restraint ... They were forever busting their buttons in spasms of insufferable yahoo pride or all too publicly agonizing over their crises. — Bruce McCall

No game designed to be played with the aid of personal servants by right-handed men who can't even bring along their dogs can be entirely good for the soul. — Bruce McCall

Here's a simple way to abolish golf's elitist and exclusionary image and make it a truly all-American sport: ditch that fifties-Republican-martini-drinker's green Brooks Brothers-style sport jacket and make the winner of the Masters slip on something in, say, black leather with plenty of metal studs. — Bruce McCall

Six Secrets to Being a Successful Humorist 1. Be scared, unhappy, and an outcast as a kid. 2. Drop out of high school. 3. Spend time alone. 4. Don't take a comedy course. 5. Read other humorists but don't worship them. 6. Don't get your hopes up. — Bruce McCall

It's easy to see golf not as a game at all but as some whey-faced, nineteenth-century Presbyterian minister's fever dream of exorcism achieved through ritual and self-mortification. — Bruce McCall