Bill Lawrence Quotes & Sayings

My friends back from the East Coast jokingly call me 'Hollywood,' and they assume I'm out at Hollywood parties, but I'm a domesticated guy with 3 kids. — Bill Lawrence

I like the end of the year to be about something. Especially with younger shows, the network pushes you to make self-contained episodes; they don't like them to be serialized: 'We want this one to be funny for someone who's never watched it and will never watch again.' And I go 'Why would anyone want to do it like that?' — Bill Lawrence

I love television; I specifically love having a dumb character on a TV show. — Bill Lawrence

The landscape is television has changed so much, because there are so many outlets, that the odds of getting a zeitgeisty hit - you know how 'American Idol' seems to appeal to every human being on the planet? Doing that in comedy nowadays is very, very hard. — Bill Lawrence

I hate shows, personally, where people stand around tossing stuff at each other, and any character can say any line, because you don't believe any of these characters care for each other. I used to fight with my friends who wrote on 'Seinfeld,' because they had such great pride in saying it was a show about nothing. — Bill Lawrence

I think feature films sell on the idea, and I think TV works based almost entirely on execution. I don't think anybody is going, 'Wow, that show is executed poorly, but the idea is so cool I just have to keep watching.' — Bill Lawrence

I believe that 99 percent of successful TV shows change an immense amount from the pilot to the tenth or twelfth episode. — Bill Lawrence

I love TV. I watch more TV than most people you know. — Bill Lawrence

JD/Dr Cox: The second you start blaming yourself for people's deaths, there's no coming back. — Bill Lawrence

To me, in retrospect, it was amazing that 'Seinfeld' was a show that had such mass appeal. At first it was a disaster in the ratings, but then it became a cultural phenomenon. I don't know if that's possible anymore, but I don't try for that. — Bill Lawrence

I think that the problem with network television is that they cling to the whole business model like they are clinging to the side of a cliff. — Bill Lawrence

The Janitor: You're the only one around here that treats me like a real person.

Elliot: What did you say?

The Janitor: There was one other girl a few years ago: red-haired doctor. She used to eat lunch with me, until the other residents started making fun of her. They called her Janitor-lunch-eater. Not the most clever group...Anyway, I know that you don't think about me the way that I think about you. And I never really believed that you would or that you could. But just pretending for today made me feel good for a change.

Elliott: It's okay. I actually had a good time.

The Janitor: Thanks...Elliot. — Bill Lawrence

J.D.: Elliot, I'm thirty years old; I'm single, I'm homeless, and I'm pretty sure I just soiled myself.
Elliot: Why don't you just move into my place?
J.D.: Oh, great, then we'll be two losers under one roof. — Bill Lawrence

JD: Anyway, I tried to convince myself the reason that I didn't come earlier was because of you coming into work drunk. But that's not it. I was scared. I guess after all this time I still thought of you as a superhero that will help me out of any situation I'm in. I needed that. But that's my problem. I'll deal with that. I guess I came over here to tell you how proud of you I am. Not because you did the best for those patients. But because after 20 years of being a doctor, you still take it this hard. — Bill Lawrence

Dr. Cox: Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present, Man Not Caring.

[points to self] — Bill Lawrence