Bette Midler Quotes & Sayings

I never know how much of what I say is true. — Bette Midler

If I don't feel right about what I'm in, I don't feel right about anything. — Bette Midler

Give a girl the right shoes, and she can conquer the world. — Bette Midler

The inventor of the modern foundation garment that we women wear today was a German scientist and opera lover by the name of Otto Titsling. — Bette Midler

If they [at the audition] don't like the way you sound they won't buy you anyway, ripped dress or no ripped dress, ass hanging out or no ass hanging out. — Bette Midler

I mean, can I really create a full, three-dimensional character? I don't know anymore. I'm certainly going to try. — Bette Midler

I think the essence of humor has not changed. It's all about surprise, facilitating follows. But the context of humor has changed. Previously, the jokes were more related to current issues, political. Today people make about each other either funny or about people like Kim Kardashian. It's brutal. Everything is so much vielschmutziger. — Bette Midler

I can get plenty of men, keeping them is the hard part. — Bette Midler

I would much rather watch myself than listen to myself. The moving is second nature, but the listening ... that's the art. — Bette Midler

GOD is watching us, from a Distance ... — Bette Midler

I'd make a wonderful Lady Macbeth. I'll wear a pair of platform shoes or something. — Bette Midler

Thank God for the gays. I don't know what would have happened but I know what did happen. Good for them and good for me. — Bette Midler

I hope to keep entertaining in some way until I can't physically entertain any longer. It's what I was born to do, and I love this profession. — Bette Midler

My idea of superwoman is someone who scrubs her own floors. — Bette Midler

Do I understand this right? I'm being marked down? — Bette Midler

People are not the best because they work hard. They work hard because they are the best. — Bette Midler

From a distance the world looks blue and green,
and the snow-capped mountains white.
From a distance the ocean meets the stream,
and the eagle takes to flight.
From a distance, there is harmony,
and it echoes through the land.
It's the voice of hope, it's the voice of peace,
it's the voice of every man — Bette Midler

When you have a steady job you're more inspired to broaden yourself. — Bette Midler

When I moved to New York City in 1965, I wanted to be in theater. I was following my Ethel Barrymore dream. But I was too young to be Ethel. — Bette Midler

I got so far away from what they told you in acting class: Do something different. Producers kept offering me the 'Sister Act' movie, but I said, 'My fans don't want to see me in a wimple.' I literally said, 'My fans don't want to see me in a wimple.' — Bette Midler

The only thing Madonna will ever do like a virgin is give birth in a stable. — Bette Midler

I firmly believe that with the right footwear one can rule the world. — Bette Midler

[On Princess Anne:] Such an active, outdoorsy lass. She loves nature in spite of what it did to her. — Bette Midler

Total contentment is only for cows. — Bette Midler

Twenty-seven people sang 'Wind Beneath My Wings' before I got around to it. A lot of people saw the movie that I sang it in, Beaches, and what they came away with was that song. They turned to their loved ones and said, 'You know, you are the wind beneath my wings!' The song expressed how they felt in a way a simple 'I love you' would not have. — Bette Midler

I read neither good nor bad about me. I let it not even in my life, so it has no effect on me. I am very sensitive. — Bette Midler

Writing a book is not as tough as it is to haul thirty-five people around the country and sweat like a horse five nights a week. — Bette Midler

I've always said we got married because there was nothing on TV. — Bette Midler

I didn't belong as a kid, and that always bothered me. If only I'd known that one day my differentness would be an asset, then my early life would have been much easier. — Bette Midler

It's the Point of Your View that Decides What You See - / One Man's Flop Is Another Man's Hit. / From Manners to Movies, the Picture Keeps Changing / Depending Upon Where You Sit. — Bette Midler

I want it all - and I would like it delivered. — Bette Midler

Enough about me. What do you think about me? — Bette Midler

I have my standards. They're low, but I have them. — Bette Midler

Sometimes my brain goes on CD shuffle. You know, you put a bunch of CD's on and hit play and random things come out. — Bette Midler

Through books and photographs, I saw a world that was not my own - and I realized that there was another world. That's why I'm concerned about education, because it helps our children see other worlds. — Bette Midler

Self-esteem is something you have to earn! The only way to achieve self-esteem is to work hard. People have an obligation to live up to their potential. — Bette Midler

My parents have not insisted that we go to college, but she wanted us to learn. Teacher, librarian, secretary, nurse. All my siblings were employed. But I wanted to be the boss, an independent contractor. — Bette Midler

Cherish forever what makes you unique, cuz you're really a yawn if it goes — Bette Midler

Before one actually visits them, everyone tends to think of their favorite countries as one grand Disneyland filled with national monuments and historical treasures conveniently laid out for easy viewing, when what they really are filled with, of course, is people going to work, laundromats and places to buy rat poison. — Bette Midler

Rap is poetry set to music. But to me it's like a jackhammer. — Bette Midler

Make sure your life is a rare entertainment! It doesn't take anything drastic. You needn't be gorgeous or wealthy or smart, just very enthusiastic! — Bette Midler

If only I'd known my differentness would be an asset, then my earlier life would have been much easier. — Bette Midler

I'd never done a straight play before, never, and it was very hard work - really, really hard work. It was dense, really wordy, and I was determined to learn every word of it - not just skip over bits and pieces. — Bette Midler

I bear no grudges. I have a mind that retains nothing. — Bette Midler

It's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It is the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It is the one who won't be taken who cannot seem to give. And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live. — Bette Midler

Here I am, one of the most colorful women of my time - if not of my block - being made to sound positively legumelike in printed interviews. — Bette Midler

If I could be granted a wish, I'd shine in your eye like a jewel. — Bette Midler

If you're frightened, you're out of luck. — Bette Midler

I wish America would spend even half as much time complaining about plastics in our oceans as we do about actresses' plastic surgery. — Bette Midler

I had no idea of being a star, all I knew was that I wanted to be a great actress, I wanted to work as an actress. So I thought the way I would be a great actress was to sing and dance first. Lay a foundation - get my foot in the door, and then undoubtedly, of course, I would be offered great roles as soon as I grew up enough to handle them. — Bette Midler

I sometimes think I should go back to school to learn French and music, but who would have me? — Bette Midler

Group conformity scares the pants off me because it's so often a prelude to cruelty towards anyone who doesn't want to - or can't - join the Big Parade. — Bette Midler

The worst part of success is to try finding someone who is happy for you. — Bette Midler

I married a German. Every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me. — Bette Midler

Melbourne is the kind of town that really makes you consider the question 'Is there life after death? — Bette Midler

I'm so glad to be back in New York. Los Angeles can be so cold, so cruel after you've been-what's the word?-oh yes: 'fired.' — Bette Midler

My husband calls it winging it - the way I just took what the studios gave me, didn't do my homework and avoided roles that would risk my image. — Bette Midler

A lot of people say that my life is wasted on me because I could be a bigger asshole than I am, but I've chosen not to be. — Bette Midler

Men's brains are smaller than those of women so they can fit into their penises. — Bette Midler

I celebrate everyone's religious holidays. if it's good enough for the righteous, it's good enough for the self-righteous, I always say. — Bette Midler

The old forms of entertainment are not extinct. Live performances are the pinnacle. If you can something that people want to see live, then you have a great career. — Bette Midler

I believe that Judy Garland's artistry was so fine. I mean, when people say: 'oh, she brought so much of her life to her music', I don't really believe that. I believe that she didn't have to. She just was a moving human being. That was her gift. — Bette Midler

I haven't left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are Viagra and Cialis.
Election, erection, election, erection!
Either way we're screwed! — Bette Midler

I'm the last of the truly tacky women. I do trash with flash and sleaze with ease. — Bette Midler

If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it? — Bette Midler

Education is my next big thing. When music and art were taken out of the schools, I went berserk! — Bette Midler

After thirty, a body has a mind of its own. — Bette Midler

Life is like cooking your masterpiece recipe. You have to get the right ingredients,have the right mixture and the right cooking time to reveal the PERFECT and DELICIOUS TASTE of your craft. — Bette Midler

When it's three o'clock in New York, it's still 1938 in London. — Bette Midler

All these rumors about [Tom Cruise] being gay. I don't believe it. I don't believe it for one minute. He hasn't been to one of my shows. — Bette Midler

Cats always seem so very wise, when staring with their half-closed eyes. Can they be thinking, I'll be nice, and maybe she will feed me twice? — Bette Midler

I had a hard-scrabble childhood with my parents. I have a lot of baggage. To come down to the footlights and accept the audience's affection inside a Broadway theater - that didn't come easily to me. — Bette Midler

I learned to accept the audience's happiness for me, which is one of the hardest things for me to learn. — Bette Midler

For days on end, I would hardly speak, and when I did only the vilest sort of gibberish would spout forth. I became morose and fat. Unapproachable, except when eating - and then only by waiters. — Bette Midler

I always try to balance the light with the heavy - a few tears of human spirit in with the sequins and the fringes. — Bette Midler

I wouldn't say I invented tacky, but I definitely brought it to its present high popularity. — Bette Midler

I love nature, in spite of what it did to me. — Bette Midler

A lot of people have no access to beauty. When I was growing up, my mother had only a few pretty things to look at. — Bette Midler

If you can accept your differentness and learn to love it and encourage it, then you can be someone wonderful. — Bette Midler

Find your Light; They can't love you if they can't see you — Bette Midler

I made a pact with myself a long time ago: Never watch anything stupider than you. It's helped me a lot. — Bette Midler

Sometimes you have to make your own opportunities and that's why I'm on TV. I wasn't going to sit around anymore, waiting patiently for the damn phone to ring. I had to create my own place- I've always done that. — Bette Midler

What I have in me ... it's not hard, and it's not cold, and it's not fierce ambition, that's not what it is. It's a drive [for success], but it's not a drive ... it's being driven, it's something I have no control over. It's something pushing me, I'm not pushing myself. — Bette Midler

Music is probably the only place I get energy from. Music and maybe watching a really tremendous performer, watching a terrific performer like Jagger or watching a great movie. — Bette Midler

I think most of us are torn. We have at least two people at war in our body. One person wants to retire and grow fabulous tomatoes, and the other wants to stand up on a pedestal and be worshipped and get bigger and bigger and bigger until she explodes. — Bette Midler

My whole life has been spent waiting for an epiphany, a manifestation of God's presence, the kind of transcendent, magical experience that let's you see your place in the big picture. And that is what I had with my first compost heap. — Bette Midler

Just remember, during the winter, far beneath the bitter snow, that there's a seed that with the sun's love in the spring becomes a rose. — Bette Midler

The outside world doesn't have a lot to offer. You have to make your own heaven in your own home. — Bette Midler

My parents taught me: Do not rely on a man. Not rely on it that you get married and it pays for you. That's what I figured. I have always paid my own bills. — Bette Midler

[On Denmark:] ... that little country of cottage cheese and courage ... — Bette Midler

The [film] business is run by men, and they're basically interested in their own species, and they're not so interested in women belonging to the human race. — Bette Midler

I feel like a million tonight - but one at a time. — Bette Midler

As an actor, you're supposed to take jobs that will challenge you or force fans to see you in a different light. By the '90s, I wasn't really an actor anymore. I was someone who went on the road with these gigantic concerts. — Bette Midler

You have to think you're the greatest thing since sliced bread, but you have to know that you're not. — Bette Midler

I tried to charm the pants off Bob Dylan, but everyone will be disappointed to learn that I was unsuccessful. I got close - a couple of fast feels in the front seat of a Cadillac. — Bette Midler

I'm working my way toward divinity. — Bette Midler

Some say love, it is a razor that leaves your soul to bleed. — Bette Midler

I try not to drink too much because when I'm drunk, I bite. — Bette Midler

Only two groups of people intimidate me absolutely: salespeople and the French. — Bette Midler

There's a kind of emotional exploration you plumb with a friend that you don't really do with your family. — Bette Midler