Benny Hill Quotes & Sayings

Before I met her, I drank and swore without reason ... now I have a reason. — Benny Hill

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect. — Benny Hill

Do unto others, then run. — Benny Hill

That's what show business is, sincere insincerity. — Benny Hill

Why would I make one woman so miserable when I can make so many women very happy? — Benny Hill

The odds against there being a bomb on a plane are a million to one, and against two bombs a million times a million to one. Next time you fly, cut the odds and take a bomb. — Benny Hill

I never yell, I never tell, but I'm grateful as hell. — Benny Hill

Roses are reddish
Violets are bluish
If it weren't for Christmas
We'd all be Jewish. — Benny Hill

Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born? — Benny Hill

The pen is mightier than the sword - It's also easier to write with! — Benny Hill

Did you ever notice that everyone in favour of birth control has already been born ? — Benny Hill

Never play leapfrog with a unicorn. — Benny Hill

Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand. — Benny Hill

Live everyday as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right. — Benny Hill

Those hot pants of hers were so damned tight, I could hardly breathe. — Benny Hill

I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: 'Oh well,' and I went back to smoking again, and that was better. — Benny Hill

I'm not against half naked girls - not as often as I'd like to be. — Benny Hill