Amy Fecteau Quotes & Sayings

Matheus wondered if the antelope ever volunteered to be eaten by the lion. — Amy Fecteau

...Most attackers aren't going to be dissuaded by a witty remark."

"That's profiling," said Mattheus. "Maybe they're Oscar Wilde fans."

"He did have great clothes."

"Proving that stereotypes can span centuries. — Amy Fecteau

English you're speaking," Matheus said. "The language that sidles up to other languages in dark alleys, mugs them, then rifles through their pockets for spare vocabulary. It's the bitch-whore of languages and it owns the world. Suck on that, Rome boy. — Amy Fecteau

Insanity is for everyone, Sunshine. All the world's peoples may enjoy its glorious bounty. — Amy Fecteau

waved a pair of underwear at him. "Grown men do not wear boxers with the Muppets on them. When I'm about to give a blowjob, I don't want to be suddenly confronted with Miss Piggy. — Amy Fecteau

Somehow, Matheus expected the night he died to be fraught with weather straight out of the Old Testament: thunderstorms and hurricane winds and floods with arks. — Amy Fecteau

He [Quin] folded his arms over his chest, giving Bianca what Matheus had privately categorized as "Scary Look Number Seven." Scary Looks One through Six consisted of Quin's everyday expressions. Studied had shown Scary Look Number Eight to cause cancer in white mice. Matheus hadn't yet seen Scary Look Number Nine, but he looked forward to his future bout of schizophrenia. — Amy Fecteau

subscribed to the theory that life consisted of a long string of miseries, tolerated only because the alternative was worse. — Amy Fecteau

Matheus thought he ranked fairly high on the scowling index, but looking at Zeb made him realize how much more he had to learn. Whole volumes of misanthropy were written into the eyebrows alone. — Amy Fecteau

Quin's smile was open and innocent and as fake as the tits on a stripper. — Amy Fecteau

Quin took on the air of someone who has just realized it's time for the yearly visit to the spinster great-aunt in a desperate attempt to woo her inheritance away from her thirty-eight cats. — Amy Fecteau

Quin stalked beside him, his anger a physical presence between them. Matheus named it Bob, and addressed imaginary questions to it to distract himself. — Amy Fecteau

some advice? Don't flirt when you're covered in shit." Matheus peeked around the door, checking if Emphysema Man had stepped out for another fix. — Amy Fecteau

made a face at her. "I'm not gay," he said. "You of all people should know that." "You were fifteen. It didn't matter if I was male, female, or a parking meter. — Amy Fecteau

Quin stopped halfway across the room, his head cocked to the side. He stared at Mattheus like an explorer who couldn't figure out if he'd discovered a fascinating new subculture or a bunch of locals playing What Can We Get the Foreigner (sic) Eat? — Amy Fecteau

laughed. "You need to learn how to fight." "I know how to fight." "Physically fight. Most attackers aren't going to be dissuaded by a witty remark." "That's profiling," said Matheus. "Maybe they're Oscar Wilde fans." "He did have great clothes." "Proving that stereotypes can span centuries." "I like to do my part," said Quin. — Amy Fecteau

He hung a patient expression on his face, the kind usually seen on people who talked about releasing your anger and surrounding yourself with good feelings while writing off anyone who disagreed with them as unenlightened. — Amy Fecteau

Matheus felt like a nice Jewish boy trying to explain that his new girlfriend with the shaved head and the swastika tattooed across her stomach had a really sweet personality, you know, deep down. — Amy Fecteau

okay. You're not that much below average." "I'm not below average at all! I'm above average! Way, way above average!" Quin shrugged. "Maybe you're a grower, not a shower," he said. "I'm going to throttle you," said Matheus. — Amy Fecteau

Matheus looked down at his feet and sighed. "I lost my shoes." "Tragedy affects us all, Sunshine," Quin said. — Amy Fecteau

Matheus pondered which deity he'd annoyed in a previous life. Maybe if he figured out which sacrifices he'd skipped, he could make amends. Did they sell goats at the farmer's market? Matheus wrinkled his nose. He didn't want to leave the city, not to mention the issue of travelling with a goat. People frowned on sticking farm animals in the trunk. What if he got a rack of lamp and chanted over that? Sheep were kind of like goats. — Amy Fecteau

Matheus pressed his fingertips to his forehead, rubbing in overlapping circles. He closed his eyes and exhaled. He wanted to grab Quin and run. Jump in the Jeep and drive until they reached the Panama Canal. — Amy Fecteau