Winchell Quotes & Sayings

The reason they're called the opposite sex is because every time you think you have your wife fooled - it's just the opposite! — Walter Winchell

He (Alexander Woollcott) always praises the first production of each season, being reluctant to stone the first cast. — Walter Winchell

Remember that nobody will ever get ahead of you as long as he is kicking you in the seat of the pants. — Walter Winchell

Gossip is the are of saying nothing in a way that leave practically nothing unsaid. — Walter Winchell

Personally, I think tying garbage bags around your head and hands is overkill. — April Winchell

Like every aspect of cancer I've weathered thus far, today's experience was not at all demoralizing, expensive or humiliating. No, it was just plain fun. — April Winchell

Walt gave me a VIP tour of the studio. I remember people doing voices. — Paul Winchell

I never have anything to talk about. — April Winchell

The only ones who like Milton Berle are his mother - and the public. — Walter Winchell

An optimist is someone who gets treed by a lion but enjoys the scenery. — Walter Winchell

I'd like to run for office someday, but I'm afraid my ability to spell might give me an unfair advantage. — April Winchell

I had a migraine for about seven or eight straight days, and I was unable to sleep most nights. — April Winchell

Today's gossip is tomorrow's headline. — Walter Winchell

I first met Walt Disney 25 or 30 years ago. — Paul Winchell

A certain columnist has been banned from all Shubert openings. Now he can wait three days and go to their closings. — Walter Winchell

I am severely distracted these days. It's hard to sit in front of the computer, uploading bad music for hours, when you have a wonderful boyfriend who treats you like a Goddess. — April Winchell

The Chicago mobs ... They practiced their own perverted form of "survival of the fittest." Where the strong clawed their way to the top of a criminal empire. And the weak died in a hail of machine gun bullets. — Walter Winchell

I know you aren't supposed to speak ill of the dead. — April Winchell

It is my contention that no other invention of man has brought greater chaos to humanity than the practice of religion. — Paul Winchell

Broadway is a main artery of New York life - the hardened artery. — Walter Winchell

My bedspread isn't washable. Since my bedding has to be washed every day, I'll have to throw it out. — April Winchell

Well, there were definitely elements of my rise in radio that had to do with my being black. But going back as far as Walter Winchell, Army Archerd and Hedda Hopper, legendary wags would grab a radio microphone and talk about what Errol Flynn and other stars were up to. — Wendy Williams

The way to become famous fast is to throw a brick at someone who is famous. — Walter Winchell

Hell hath no fury like a woman cheated out of a million dollars. — Walter Winchell

True friends walks in when the rest of the world has walked out. — Walter Winchell

Children are so used to seeing puppets that when they see a real ventriloquist they don't understand it. — Paul Winchell

I'll take my alkaloid diuretics wherever I can get them. If there isn't a 7-11 in the vicinity, a Winchell's donut shop is Plan B. The joe at both places is almost indistinguishable, like the difference between Johnny Walker and Cutty Sark, but only cab drivers and hobos draw such fine distinctions. — Gary Reilly

I have found that many other countries will buy off on anything American. As much as they hate us, they want to be us more than anything. — April Winchell

Ventriloquism today is in a slump. — Paul Winchell

Hollywood is where they shoot too many pictures and not enough actors. — Walter Winchell

Orphans, dead parents, lonely children at Christmas, morose spoken word recordings, everything you love about the holidays. Move the turkey over so you can fit your head in the oven. — April Winchell

The theme of the party was Neverland Ranch, so guests were asked to come as anyone or anything associated with Michael Jackson. It was all very disturbing. — April Winchell

Good evening, Mr. and Mrs. America from border to border and coast to coast and all the ships at sea. Let's go to press. — Walter Winchell

Too many people expect wonders from democracy, when the most wonderful thing of all is just having it. — Walter Winchell

I never lost a friend I wanted to keep. — Walter Winchell

On television, everyone talks and they don't care about the mechanics. — Paul Winchell

I remember as a kid watching TV and seeing Mel Blanc doing his voices and Paul Winchell doing his ventriloquism and thinking, 'Those guys are having a good time. I want to do that.' — Jim Cummings

The same thing happened today that happened yesterday, only to different people. — Walter Winchell

I remember lying down for a nap one day at about 4:00 and walking up at 11:00 the next morning. — April Winchell

She's been on more laps than a napkin. — Walter Winchell

Your body is a temple, whether you're a Jew or not. — April Winchell

A pessimist is one who builds dungeons in the air. — Walter Winchell

I can wholeheartedly apologize for not being at all sorry. And it really is the least I can do. — April Winchell

Money sometimes makes fools of important persons, but it may also make important persons of fools. — Walter Winchell

Hollywood is a place where they place you under contract instead of under observation. — Walter Winchell

The best way to get along is never to forgive an enemy or forget a friend. — Walter Winchell

Let's stop playing with ourselves and get on with the entertainment, shall we? — April Winchell

A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out. — Walter Winchell

Here lies Walter Winchell in the dirt he loved so well. — Walter Winchell

Nothing recedes like success. — Walter Winchell

America - love it or leave it. — Walter Winchell

Usually, jet lag is not this big of an issue for me. I'm not sure why I'm so disoriented this time. It could be due to the amount of chocolate and french fries I've eaten in the last two and a half weeks. — April Winchell

I had glow in the dark bands made up and I've given away a ton of them. — April Winchell

It's a sure sign of summer if the chair gets up when you do. — Walter Winchell

Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid. — Walter Winchell

I wish you a tolerable Thursday. That's all any of us can hope for. — April Winchell

I usually get my stuff from people who promised somebody else that they would keep it a secret. — Walter Winchell

I always like to get local music when I'm in another country. — April Winchell

Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you. — Walter Winchell