Will Rogers Humorist Quotes & Sayings

It's every singer's dream to get to Carnegie Hall. — Megan Hilty

If there's a disaster, do you go over to your neighbor's house with: a) a covered dish or b) a shotgun? It's game theory. If you believe your neighbor is coming over with a shotgun, you'd be an idiot to pick a); if she believes the same thing about you, you can bet she's not going to choose a) either. The way to get to a) is to do a) even if you think your neighbor will pick b). Sometimes she'll point her gun at you and tell you to get off her land, but if she was only holding the gun because she thought you'd have one, then she'll put on the safety and you can have a potluck. — Cory Doctorow

There is no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. — Will Rogers

To paraphrase the great humorist, Will Rogers . . . "We're all ignorant, but only on different subjects". — Wilson Casey

My mom says crying is just your body expelling all the bad stuff. Like a sneeze. Like your soul sneezing. — Jeff Garvin

Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: But a woman who fears the Lord,
She shall be praised.
(Proverbs 31:30 Modern King James Version) — Anonymous

I'm all for the path of least resistance. — Cody Lundin

Worship at its best is a social experience with people of all levels of life coming together to realize their oneness and unity under God. Whenever the church, consciously or unconsciously caters to one class it loses the spiritual force of the whosoever will, let him come, doctrine and is in danger of becoming a little more than a social club with a thin veneer of religiosity. — Martin Luther King Jr.

You've got to be (an) optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be a humorist to stay one — Will Rogers

I remember what J. Golden Kimball said when he came down to the stake where I was presiding. I introduced him as the 'Will Rogers' of the Church, and told the congregation that he was a great humorist. When he got up he said, 'You know, I think the Lord himself likes a joke. If he didn't, he wouldn't have made some of you folks! — Hugh B. Brown

O Lord I cannot bear the thought of Philip lying still in such a place as this and when that thought arises must hum some scrap of tune energetically while praying No no no take that cup away Lord let me go first before any of them I love (before Philip Mary Jack Jr before dear Lydia) only that's no good either since when they reach their end I will not be there to help them? — George Saunders