Utensil Quotes & Sayings

The handkerchief is the universal utensil of the seasoned traveler. It can be a sanitizing device, a seat cover, a dust mask, a garrote, a bandage, a gag, or a white flag. One may feel well-prepared with nothing but a pocket square. — Josiah Bancroft

You got to figure out how to eat your snack while your elbows are touching. You got to learn how to twist your little plastic utensil. — Brian Regan

It required a great deal of Cam's willpower - and he had a considerable supply - not to skewer Christopher Frost with a dining utensil. He wanted her attention. All of it. — Lisa Kleypas

I'm an immensely shy and vulnerable woman. My husband has never seen me naked. Nor has he expressed the least desire to do so. — Barry Humphries

It is easy to study the rules of overloading and of templates without noticing that together they are one of the keys to elegant and efficient type-safe containers. — Bjarne Stroustrup

My thighs and hips are on fire. I don't know where I end and you begin. — Amanda Carlson

The fact evil exists speaks far more about man than about God. The Bible says God hates sin. — Dee Henderson

As a child, I'd help my mum cook, and it was ridiculous - she had the correct gadget or utensil for everything. 'Stop! Don't use that, I have exactly the right utensil.' After I left home, I survived on cup-a-meals and never saw myself as being like her. Now I've become her. — Kelis

Shame on you, Crispin. Married how long, and you haven't spanked your wife with a metal spatula yet?"
I'd gotten used to Ian's assumption that everyone was as perverted as he was, so I didn't miss a beat.
"We prefer blender beaters for our kitchen utensil kink," I said with a straight face.
Bones hid his smile behind his hand, but Ian looked intrigued.
"I haven't tried that ... oh, you're lying, aren't you?"
"Ya think?" I asked with a snort.
Ian gave a sigh of exaggerated patience and glanced at Bones.
"Being related to her through you is a real trial. — Jeaniene Frost

Sit and spin 'til you rot on the cosmic utensil. — Frank Zappa

If they tell me one more time that I'm using the wrong fork for a part of a meal, I swear I'll show them exactly how multifunctional the utensil can be. — Jennifer Ellision

This is what is meant by being single-minded. If you choose something, choose it with all your might, with all your heart. Don't be faint-hearted. Keep going! Keep moving toward it. Be determined. — Neale Donald Walsch

The judgment is an utensil proper for all subjects, and will have an oar in everything. — Michel De Montaigne

What kind of knife is this?" Locke held a rounded buttering utensil up for Chains' inspection. "It's all wrong. You couldn't kill anyone with this. — Scott Lynch

Objects of Appreciation: Every time you go to use a utensil or instrument, take pleasure and feel gratitude for the fact that you have such an object available. If you focus on this, you'll be able to be lifted many many times each day. Some common examples include: a pen, fork, cup, key, computers, clock, chair, stapler, and eyeglasses. — Zelig Pliskin

The savage deals largely with crude stimuli; we have weighted stimuli. Prior human efforts have made over natural conditions. As they originally existed they were indifferent to human endeavors. Every domesticated plant and animal, every tool, every utensil, every appliance, every manufactured article, every esthetic decoration, every work of art means a transformation of conditions once hostile or indifferent to characteristic human activities into friendly and favoring conditions. Because the activities of children today are controlled by these selected and charged stimuli, children are able to traverse in a short lifetime what the race has needed slow, tortured ages to attain. The dice have been loaded by all the successes which have preceded. — John Dewey

The saddest utensil I've come across is an 'anti-loneliness ramen bowl,' which holds your iPhone to keep you company as you slurp your solitary bowl of noodles. But the iPhone cannot return your gaze or reassure you that you didn't squeeze too much lime into the soup, though maybe a dinner-conversation app is only a matter of time. — Bee Wilson

So Stapes conducted a dinner for just the two of us, then informed me of a dozen small but important mistakes I had made. Setting down a dirty utensil was considered crude, for example. That meant it was perfectly acceptable to lick one's knife clean. In fact, if you didn't want to dirty your napkin it was the only seemly thing to do. — Patrick Rothfuss

What's the rule for fighting? Hit the soft parts with your hand and the hard parts with a utensil? — Kaje Harper

For me, one I love the 80's, I love 80's music, I'm sort of a baby of the 80's, I grew up in the 80s. — Will Estes

PIANO, n. A parlor utensil for subduing the impenitent visitor. It is operated by pressing the keys of the machine and the spirits of the audience. — Ambrose Bierce

Sometimes I'll forget a utensil's name, and I'll say, "Give me that pointy thing," as I point with my pointy finger. — Jarod Kintz

Have that spatula ready when I return," Ian sang out to her.
"I don't even want to know what that means," were my first words when he climbed into the RV.
"You don't? Shame on you, Crispin. Married how long, and you haven't spanked your wife with a metal spatula yet?
"We prefer blender beaters for our kitchen utensil kink," I said with a straight face.
Bones hid his smile behind his hand, but Ian looked intrigued.
"I haven't tried that.....oh, you're lying, aren't you?"
"Ya think?" I asked with a snort. — Jeaniene Frost

New Rule: The person who sat in my seat on the flight before me and could not finish the People magazine crossword puzzle has to be ashamed of themselves. I don't know who you are, but "Desperate _wives"? Nothing? A three-letter word for "Writing utensil, you're holding it in your hand." Here's one more for you: Four letters, begins with a v, something you shouldn't be allowed to do this November. — Bill Maher

Bottled, was he?" Said Colonel Bantry, with an Englishman's sympathy for alcoholic excess. "Oh, well, can't judge a fellow by what he does when he's drunk? When I was at Cambridge, I remember I put a certain utensil - well - well, nevermind. — Agatha Christie

You better be careful, I've got a ladle. You never know what a trained killer can do with an innocent-looking kitchen utensil.
I don't think you're a trained killer.
So should I be insulted that you think I'm an amateur killer? — Eileen Cook

People use music as a utensil to better themselves. — Jessica Simpson

O, sir, I will not be so hard-hearted. I will give out divers schedules of my beauty. It shall be inventoried, and every particle and utensil labeled to my will: as, item, two lips indifferent red; item, two grey eyes, with lids to them; item, one neck, one chin, and so forth. — William Shakespeare

Never bring a weapon too big to double as a dining utensil to the table when dining with friends. — Seanan McGuire

He began to attack the bone with a regular knife and spoon. Until I nudged him with an elbow. "The marrow shovel." It was meant to reach down to the bottom of a bone and lift the marrow out. He reached for the utensil. "That's right. I always forget!" He wouldn't if Aunt had been his teacher. "Why do you think it is that we can't just use a knife?" I smothered a laugh as I remembered that I had asked Aunt that very same thing. "I don't know." "Neither do I. This table is a pigeon trap. A dozen different forks and knives and spoons. Four different goblets. All of them just waiting to be knocked over or misapplied and mishandled. It's a wonder anyone is ever tempted to eat!" "You're doing quite well." "Franklin's much better at all of this than I am." "But you're much better at conversing." "And making you laugh? Am I better at that?" I smiled. "Yes. I would say so." "Good. Because that, at least, is something worthwhile. — Siri Mitchell

Every contrivance of man, every tool, every instrument, every utensil, every article designed for use, of each and every kind, evolved from a very simple beginnings. — Robert Collier

Okay, dumbass. Perspective time," Gordon muttered as he ripped the greasy bag open. He would force himself to eat. He was not going to become an obsessed basketcase. He wasn't.

"First of all," he said, yanking the utensil drawer open." He is capable of murdering a huge juicer in the middle of the street and then disappearing with the body within seconds."

He removed one of the cartons and shoved his fork into the mound of noodles. "Two, he is probably a sociopath. Three, he thinks I'm a complete ballsack of a moron. — Santino Hassell