Twittascope Quotes & Sayings

There are very few humorists who have written first-rate humor after they've become elderly. — Richard Armour

When we decline to talk about what is real simply because it's uncomfortable to do so, we seal our own fate. — Richard Heinberg

News reporting is a cycle: No matter how much you work at sending a message, it's only successful if it's received. — Jessica Savitch

The question is not, could Utah compete week in and week out in the ACC, SEC, Big Ten, whatever, .. The question is, in a one- game setting, can Utah compete, can Utah get the market share, sell the tickets of one of those more familiar institutions. Nobody knows that answer. — Craig Thompson

The more complicated the order, the bigger the asshole. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a 'decaf grandee, half soy, half lowfat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n'-Low and one NutraSweet,' ooooh, you're a huge asshole. — George Carlin

When beggars and shoeshine boys, barbers and beauticians can tell you how to get rich it is time to remind yourself that there is no more dangerous illusion than the belief that one can get something for nothing. — Bernard Baruch

True life lies in laughter, love and work. — Elbert Hubbard

God is inseparably linked to the coming of Pentecost. In a certain sense, Jesus lacked the authority to dispatch the Spirit prior to His ascension. — R.C. Sproul

I used to want to be a computer programmer when I was younger. We got an Apple II Plus when I was, like, 11 and I wrote programs and BASIC on that, like I think a lot of people did, but I have no idea how to program in the current languages at all. — Chris Parnell

Entrepreneurship is not a title, it is a mindset, a way of life; it is the future! — Farshad Asl

I don't have any romantic ideas about marriage. Trust me. A white dress ... ? No. It's not something for me. — Diane Kruger

Promise you'll never let go of my hand?"
He kissed her. It was the easiest vow he'd ever made. "Promise. — Mari Carr

Whenever I get into a tough situation ... I think of growing up, and I say, 'This situation won't be the worst one I've ever been in. — Billy Wagner

By starving myself into society's beauty ideal, I had compromised my success, my independence, and my quality of life. Being overweight was really no different. It was just the "f - you" response to the same pressure. I was still responding to the pressure to comply to the fashion industry's standards of beauty, just in the negative sense. I was still answering to their demands when really I shouldn't have been listening to them at all. The images of stick-thin prepubescent girls never should have had power over me. I should've had my sights set on successful businesswomen and successful female artists, authors, and politicians to emulate. Instead I stupidly and pointlessly just wanted to be considered pretty. I squandered my brain and my talent to squeeze into a size 2 dress while my male counterparts went to work on making money, making policy, making a difference. — Portia De Rossi

I shook hands with the attorney, advising him to forgive the cat he had banished from his offices since a child had been the downfall of the bird, not a feline at all. The scratches on the birdcage were months old, while the small, sticky chocolate fingerprints on the cage door were less than a week old. He looked shocked and glanced wordlessly over at his birdcage, so I walked over to the nearest window to point to the matching chocolate fingerprints where a child had released the budgie into the skies of Toronto. — Angela Misri