Truthful Humor Quotes & Sayings

Even when I'm about to die I like to sound interesting and special. It was just talk. — Peter Milligan

Humor is, by its nature, more truthful than factual. — P. J. O'Rourke

Easy in but not easily out, as the lobster said in the lobster pot! — C.S. Lewis

The first glance at the pillow showed me a repulsive sentinel perched upon each end of it
cockroaches as large as peach leaves
fellows with long, quivering antennae and fiery, malignant eyes. They were grating their teeth like tobacco worms, and appeared to be dissatisfied about something. I had often heard that these reptiles were in the habit of eating off sleeping sailors' toe nails down to the quick, and I would not get in the bunk any more. I lay down on the floor. But a rat came and bothered me, and shortly afterward a procession of cockroaches arrived and camped in my hair. In a few moments the rooster was crowing with uncommon spirit and a party of fleas were throwing double somersaults about my person in the wildest disorder, and taking a bite every time they stuck. I was beginning to feel really annoyed. I got up and put my clothes on and went on deck.
The above is not overdrawn; it is a truthful sketch of inter-island schooner life. — Mark Twain

[I'm] almost positive there is no God. — Sarah Silverman

When I did 'Sex and the City,' it was like, 'Let's do a comedy where the humor is not coming from innuendo but from the a truthful place. This is a show where we're going to be able to say and do what we want.' — Darren Star

At this point, most people would have thrown themselves down on the ground and given up hope. And by most people, I mean me. — Rick Riordan

I laughed. Partly at the joke, partly at how Afghan humor never changed. Wars were waged, the Internet was invented, and a robot had rolled on the surface of Mars, and in Afghanistan we were still telling Mullah Nasruddin jokes. — Khaled Hosseini

Friends are thieves of time — Sajjad Ali Noor

I love telling truthful honest stories. I suppose I'd love the opportunity to be a superhero within a realistic dramatic piece. It would have opportunity for humor too of course. And ideally I would be the writer/director? (Though I suppose if I was, it is POSSIBLE I would give myself a meaty but smaller part so I could focus on the latter of my duties ... Maybe). — E.J. Bonilla

President Obama has created at least three jobs that I know of - Bob McDonnell, Chris Christie, and Scott Brown. — Newt Gingrich

The undutiful behaviour of children towards their parents is a very great provocation to God our common Father; and, if men do not punish it, he will. — Matthew Henry

When he thought of her, he could call up a vivid picture of her to himself, especially the charm of that little fair head, so freely set on the shapely girlish shoulders, and so full of childish brightness and good humor. The childishness of her expression, together with the delicate beauty of her figure, made up her special charm, and that he fully realised. But what always struck him in her as something unlooked for, was the expression of her eyes, soft, serene, and truthful, and above all, her smile, which always transported Levin to an enchanted world, where he felt himself softened and tender, as he remembered himself in some days of his early childhood. — Leo Tolstoy

Rereading old books is the highest form of literary pleasure and instructs you in what is deepest in your own yearnings.
Reading well is one of the great pleasures that solitude can afford you, because it is, at least in my experience, the most healing of pleasures. It returns you to otherness, whether in yourself or in friends. Imaginative literature is otherness and as such, alleviates loneliness. — Harold Bloom