Sykes Quotes & Sayings
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Top Sykes Quotes

There are just so many more laws and rules that apply with marriage that do not come with domestic partnership and also to me it's the commitment. — Wanda Sykes

When I am outside at night by myself every person turns into a pedophile. So I tend to walk a little faster than usual and then I sprint. — Wanda Sykes

With a black president, I can relax ... I can dance in public ... I can buy a whole watermelon now. — Wanda Sykes

I felt like I was being attacked, personally attacked - our community was attacked. Now, I gotta get in their face. I'm proud to be a woman. I'm proud to be a black woman. And I'm proud to be gay. — Wanda Sykes

You know you've checked into Heartbreak Hotel for real when you feel less desirable than uncooked fish. — Plum Sykes

Crime and religion are the only two things that people are willing to both die for and kill over. — Sam Sykes

I don't like the saying keep your friends close and enemies closer. I want my enemy on a different planet. — Wanda Sykes

So the blues player, he ain't worried and bothered, but he's got something for the worried people. — Roosevelt Sykes

I watch Jay. I watch 'Letterman'. I flip back and forth between 'Conan' and 'Letterman', especially the top of the show for those guys. — Wanda Sykes

L.A. is nothing but a bunch of driving, and I hate all that damn driving 'cause it interferes with my drinking. — Wanda Sykes

Part of Sykes's motive was rooted in religiosity. A devout Catholic, he regarded a return of the ancient tribe of Israel to the Holy Land as a way to correct
a nearly two-thousand-year-old wrong. That view had taken on new passion and
urgency with the massacres of the Armenians. To Sykes, in that ongoing atrocity, the Ottoman Empire had proven it could never again be trusted to protect
its religious minority populations. At war's end, the Christian and Jewish Holy
Land of Palestine would be taken from it, and the failure of the Crusades made
right. — Scott Anderson

But courage was a flower, something that blossomed and wilted swiftly. And Gariath was a cold snap in winter. — Sam Sykes

I was really gifted at being able to construct a joke, but it's like they weren't even memorable, my first jokes, because they were so about nothing. — Wanda Sykes

While I respect my cousin Annette Sykes' commitment in engaging in the political process, I do not endorse or support any political party. — Cliff Curtis

I think it's because my comedy is in your face, and it comes from a place that's real. — Wanda Sykes

I'm like, If you do something dumb, I'll write about it. If you put something out there, to me it's like you're kind of asking for it. — Wanda Sykes

My thing is when people come up and say to me good set tonight and I say you too and then you find out that person is not in any band. Happens to me a lot. — Oliver Sykes

You know what, I think maybe it's because men like to fart, and the host wants to be able to sit in his writers' room and just pass gas freely. Me, I'm a lady. I'm dainty. I know to get up and leave the room and go to my office. — Wanda Sykes

For the love of god, will you bite your tongue? — Oliver Sykes

Women and our right to choose were going to be challenged with Ashcroft around. When Bush appointed Ashcroft, I went out and got me four abortions. I stocked up. The doctor was like, "Listen, you're not pregnant." I said, "Hey, just shut up and do your job. I'm exercising my right while I can, dammit. — Wanda Sykes

It gets really dark before it gets light. — Oliver Sykes

I'm here today because I refused to be unhappy. I took a chance. — Wanda Sykes

What drives the creative person is that we see it all. — Wanda Sykes

Why don't you marry another gay guy? That was fun... — Wanda Sykes

Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very
few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on
your own time. — Charles J. Sykes

Since when did I become the spokesperson for nappy-headed hos? — Wanda Sykes

Don't not ever stop not writing nothing. — Sam Sykes

But I understand that relationship; I understand how the mother-in-law, daughter-in-law relationship has so many conflicts because it's so forced. — Wanda Sykes

Once you start making money, you can be an ass. But I am not an ass. I'm too lazy, that takes a lot of energy. — Wanda Sykes

As soon as you say 'I do,' you'll discover that marriage is like a car. Both of you might be sitting in the front seat, but only one of you is driving. And most marriages are more like a motorcycle than a car. Somebody has to sit in the back, and you have to yell just to be heard. — Wanda Sykes

Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a
different word for burger flipping; they called it opportunity. — Charles J. Sykes

I used to feel like I was drowning. So I stopped trying to swim. — Oliver Sykes

A fun read that reminds single girls everywhere that it's fabulous to be single. — Plum Sykes

Charlotte Sykes approaching from the washrooms. She had changed into high heels and a tangerine-colored blouse that clashed with all her best intentions. — Amor Towles

The president is on national TV apologizing for getting oral sex. Why didn't he just stick with his lie? You got to stick with your lie. If you lie, you have to believe that lie whole-heartedly. It has to become the truth for you. But this man, the most powerful man in the world, is on national TV apologizing for receiving oral sex. He's an idiot. There are men sitting in here right now who would gladly accept oral sex on national TV. — Wanda Sykes

Lot Of Strip Clubs in Florida ... Good grief ... Florida has so many strip clubs, they need to change their state flag to a brass pole. — Wanda Sykes

Half-drunken poetry is the most honest kind of poetry. Too slurred to be eloquent, not slurred enough to be witless. — Sam Sykes

I was extremely unpopular at school. Once the hardest kid in school beat me up and there was a plan for about 30 other kids to kick me in the face once I was down. Good times! — Oliver Sykes

We never hid anything from the kids. I feel whole again, I really do. I've told them, 'Mommy's boo-boo is much better now.' — Wanda Sykes

to say that man is a social animal is also to say that man never lives in a world completely of his own choosing. — Gresham M. Sykes

By 1680 Giovanni Borelli had reached the conclusion, in his book De Volatu, that it was impossible that man should ever achieve flight by his own strength. — Frederick Hugh Sykes

Sometimes black people really want to hold onto our oppression - 'This is ours! This belongs to us.' You can't just talk about equality for somebody else. Let's pass it on. Let's pass it on to somebody else. At the end of the day, it is all about inequality. — Wanda Sykes

I just never really thought there could be something worse than death. — Oliver Sykes

Mark Sykes exemplified another characteristic common among the British ruling class of the Edwardian age, a breezy arrogance that held that most of the world's messy problems were capable of neat solution, that the British had the answers to many of them, and that it was their special burden - no less tiresome for being God-given - to enlighten the rest of humanity to that fact. — Scott Anderson

Go back in time. Next question go and look at dinosaurs. I would be sitting on a rock looking at a T- Rex, loving life. — Oliver Sykes

That's proof right there that men and women are on different levels because men can watch two women together and that's a turn-on. It doesn't work the same way for us, does it, ladies? No, uh-uh - it doesn't work the same. You ask any woman in here her sexual fantasy, and I will bet you a million dollars that it's NOT to go home and catch your man bent over with some big, burly guy standing behind him. — Wanda Sykes

The higher I get the lower I sink. — Oliver Sykes

Yeah, I had top-secret clearance and everything. — Wanda Sykes

The only person to blame is the person making up the bullshit. — Oliver Sykes

Back then, I was doing more of my impression of what a comic is supposed to do. — Wanda Sykes

Seriously, I don't need a gun. I'm easily annoyed. I would shoot people in my house that I invited over. — Wanda Sykes

One of them stepped from the crowd. It was Zeebo, the garbage collector. "Mister Jem," he said, "we're mighty glad to have you all here. Don't pay no 'tention to Lula, she's contentious because Reverend Sykes threatened to church her. She's a troublemaker from way back, got fancy ideas an' haughty ways - we're mighty glad to have you all." With that, Calpurnia led us to the church door where we were greeted by Reverend Sykes, who led us to the front pew. First Purchase was unceiled and unpainted within. Along its walls unlighted kerosense lamps hung on brass brackets; pine benches served as pews. Behind the rough oak pulpit a faded pink silk banner proclaimed God Is Love, the church's only decoration except a roto-gravure print of Hunt's The Light of the World. — Harper Lee

Hold that thought. This sounds like the kind of conversation I'll need pants for." It — Sam Sykes

I hate when women compare men to dogs. Men are not dogs. Dogs are loyal. I've never found any strange panties in my dog's house. — Wanda Sykes

He could sense the word resting on her tongue as a hedonist sensed a tongue resting on something else. — Sam Sykes

Follow the dream, work hard, inspire and be inspired. — Nathan Sykes

But that's precisely how stupidity flourishes; in bunches, in fast-growing weeds that choke delicately nurtured knowledge. — Sam Sykes

'Dirtiest Secret' is Dallas Sykes' story. And it is a stand-alone trilogy that readers can come to completely fresh. — Julie Kenner

I think the worst one [indian mascot] is the Cleveland Indians' Big Chief Wahoo. It's just a red face on a baseball with a big, toothy grin. It's the Sambo of all other offensive mascots. I have never seen a Native American smile that hard before, not even at a casino opening. — Wanda Sykes

I write the lyrics based on what is going on in my life - I'm not going to write about the old hair metal stuff, like castles and stuff. — Oliver Sykes

To me, political office should be like jury duty. You should just get a notice in mail one day and be like, I'm Secretary of State next month! — Wanda Sykes

Then you had people who wanted to get into comedy just to get a TV deal. — Wanda Sykes

I think the most difficult thing about coming out is just getting to that place where you're comfortable with who you are and you're sayin' hey this is ok and just accepting yourself and not caring what other people think. Because if you don't have that confidence in who you are then, if things don't go the way you wish that they will, you know if people aren't accepting then they can easily tear you down if you're not prepared and comfortable with who you are. — Wanda Sykes

I watched a lot of comedy growing up. — Wanda Sykes

That's what they want: two women. Fellas, I think that's a bit lofty. Because, come on, think about it - if you can't satisfy that one woman, why do you want to piss off another one? Why have two angry women in the bed with you at the same time? And think about it - you know how much you hate to talk after sex, imagine having two women just nagging you to death. — Wanda Sykes

I like doing a bunch of different things, being all over the place. — Wanda Sykes

Should I talk about [having breast cancer]? Because how many things could I have? You know black, lesbian - I'm like, I can't be the poster child for everything. At least with the LGBT issues we get a parade and a float and it's a party. — Wanda Sykes

I had lunch with a chess champion the other day. I knew he was a chess champion because it took him 20 minutes to pass the salt. — Eric Sykes

I'm a comedian so I'm not waiting around for someone to write a part for me. I don't have to wait for somebody else to create my next job; I have the ability to basically write my own ticket. — Wanda Sykes

By looking at the details of the DNA, it is possible to chart the flow of your ancestry from your ultimate grandmother to more modern times. — Bryan Sykes

Hope is ill advised. — Sam Sykes

I have problems with YouTube and things like that, when you catch it mid production. If I'm doing a show and I'm working on a bit and someone's there with a phone, they record it and put it online - it's not the finished product. — Wanda Sykes

So when you do your family tree and Margaret Cho does hers, and ... Wanda Sykes and John Legend ... we're adding to the database that scholars can then draw from to generalize about the complexity of the American experience. And that's the contribution that family trees make to broader scholarship. — Henry Louis Gates

Everything I loved became everything I've lost. — Oliver Sykes

As Lawrence would later write in Seven Pillars, Sykes was the imaginative advocate of unconvincing world movements ... a bundle of prejudices, intuitions, half-sciences. His ideas were of the outside, and he lacked patience to test his materials before choosing his style of building. He would take an aspect of the truth, detach it from its circumstances, inflate it, twist and model it. — Scott Anderson

To hug Toni Burgess and Sandy Wilson, the Devil Girlz we'd met in Taylor Creek, Oregon. Correction: former Devil Girlz. There was no sign of leather. Instead Toni was in a dress and had soccer-mom hair, and she said she was going back to teaching school. Sandy just looked sweet. More people were introduced: lawyers for both sides, and His Honor Marlon Sykes, a judge — James Patterson

I'm really funny now. — Wanda Sykes

It's not until you develop your own voice, your own persona onstage that you become your own comic, who you really are. — Wanda Sykes

Oral myths are closer to the genetic conclusions than the often ambiguous scientific evidence of archaeology. — Bryan Sykes

I'm shy. I am. I mean, if I get around, you know, in a room of a bunch of people especially I - you know, I don't know or - it takes me a while to warm up. I'm - and the real me, I'm not as witty as, you know, as the comic Wanda. The comic, she's had time to work on some things. — Wanda Sykes

But I think funny and talent will always win out; I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that. — Wanda Sykes

I love my family but my family - they're the type of people that never let you forget anything you ever did ... I was in the first grade Christmas play - I'm playing Mary. Now, during the course of the play, I dropped the baby Jesus ... They still talk about this. I go to my family reunion, and one of my cousins just had a baby. So I'm like, 'Oh, that's a cute little baby. Let me hold the baby ... ' And my aunt runs over, 'Don't you give her that baby! You know she dropped the baby Jesus!' — Wanda Sykes

I'm here today because I hated everything else. — Wanda Sykes

All these teenagers tell us how much they want to grow up and then when they do they want to be young again. — Wanda Sykes

Holly Sykes, says Publicity Girl, falling down the sar-chasm. — David Mitchell

We are all a complete mixture;yet at the same time,we are all related.Each gene can trace its own journey to a different common ancestor.This is a quite extraordinary legacy that we all have inherited from the people who lived before us.Our genes did not just appear when we were born.They have been carried to us by millions of individual lives over thousands of generations. — Bryan Sykes

I have a well-balanced show. It's 50/50 on men/women, and also African-American/white writers, it's the same thing. I have four African-American writers, and four non-African-American writers. — Wanda Sykes

And then also I think it's harder for women because comedy is so opposite of being ladylike. — Wanda Sykes

I don't like doing the same material over and over again. It's not fun. — Wanda Sykes