Surfing Humor Quotes & Sayings

The koans in the Blue Cliff Record do their best to introduce people to their true natures. One of them (number 27 out of 100) quotes a monk asking the master Yun Men, "How is it when the tree withers and the leaves fall?" There are many ways to interpret the question, of course. — Mark Epstein

I try to be like a forest: revitalizing and constantly growing. — Forest Whitaker

I really believe in less is more in terms of makeup. I try not to wear too much foundation. I like to see my skin coming through. I like to see my freckles. I just think that's the most youthful look. — Michelle Monaghan

It seems that the problem with government as an institution is uniformly bad, worldwide. It may be the ONLY thing that binds all nations together - the incompetence of all of their governments ... The unions are the mafia, which is the CIA, which is the Catholic Church, which is the government, which is what's the difference? It's corrupt! It's the same guys pulling these strings, you know? One day he pulls the string and this lamp comes out, the next say he pulls the string and there's a missile coming out. — Frank Zappa

That's the exciting part about capitalism. It's like surfing, you have to catch the wave. - Martin Peter (aka Vermin Gobsmack) — Jamie Delano

Body. Soul. Mind. Sensations: the body. Desires: the soul. Reasoning: the mind. — Marcus Aurelius

Prayer is not a substitute for work. First we have to do all we can ourselves to understand a situation. Then when we ask for help, sometimes it is very evident, sometimes it isn't. Sometimes we may well be helped by not getting a decision. — George W. Romney

The arrow shot by the archer may or may not kill a single person. But stratagems devised by wise men can kill even babes in the womb. — Kautilya

As I've been telling your, son, you get nowhere looking at clothes and the color of the skin to judge a man. It won't tell you nothing about what's inside. That's where a fellow's mettle is, and that's what counts. — Richard Puz

'It is my duty to warn you that it will be used against you,' cried the Inspector, with the magnificent fair play of the British criminal law. — Arthur Conan Doyle

New Rule: Apple's next device must be a computer that you control with your tongue. Thanks for eliminating the keyboard and the mouse, but pointing and pushing at things already seems too complicated and tiring. We're Americans
and until you free our hands from the computer entirely, we can never attain our ultimate goal: Web surfing while eating and masturbating. — Bill Maher

Opium teaches only one thing, which is that aside from physical suffering, there is nothing real. — Andre Malraux

In both Surfing the Himalayas and Snowboarding to Nirvana, I have tried to transmit as best I could the spirit of humor, and the sense of humor of the monks I have encountered. — Frederick Lenz

If the tea party is so racist, how come when they have straw polls the black guy keeps winning? — Herman Cain

Our relationship finally ended when he took to waking me up in the wee hours o the morning when he would go surfing. He thought it might be fun to have me come watch. "Fun for who?" I wanted to ask. i had never asked him to come to Happy Hour and watch me drink. — Chelsea Handler

Flotsam said, "He thinks I shouldn't do surfboard self-defense on four squids that flip us off and stole my juices when I was rippin'. They thought it was cooleo till one of them caught my log upside his head when I snaked him on the next wave."

"What?" Ronnie said.

"All I said was," Jetsam said to Flotsam, "You should cap the little surf Nazi if you wanna turn him into part of the food chain, not torpedo him till he's almost dead in the foamy. — Joseph Wambaugh

Actually, watching television and surfing the Internet are really excellent practice for being dead. — Chuck Palahniuk

Rule #1 - Never kiss a stinking mermaid. — John Rafferty

I guess somethings turned out too sad even to be explained with a bases-loaded strikeout. — Ava Dellaira