Stupid O'reilly Quotes & Sayings

And they go: Foxes are our favrit Animal. And I go: Thanks. And they go: Why o why were we so stupid as to choose Dogs for our mane Pets? And I go: I reely don't know. — George Saunders

Say stupid shit. Barf out the fucking-around-o-maniacal schizo flow. Barter whatever for whoever wants to read it. — Felix Guattari

The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the smallest corners of life - this much we can stand. But the real problem is that government is boring. We could cure or mitigate the other ills Washington visits on us if we could only bring ourselves to pay attention to Washington itself. But we cannot. — P. J. O'Rourke

Liberals are always proposing perfectly insane ideas, laws that will make everybody happy, laws that will make everything right, make us live forever, and all be rich. Conservatives are never that stupid. — P. J. O'Rourke

Anybody that you put on TV five hours a week is at some point is going to say something stupid. — Rosie O'Donnell

I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to. — Shaquille O'Neal

And why do you imagine that we bring people to this place?' 'To make them confess.' 'No, that is not the reason. Try again.' 'To punish them.' 'No!' exclaimed O'Brien. His voice had changed extraordinarily, and his face had suddenly become both stern and animated. 'No! Not merely to extract your confession, not to punish you. Shall I tell you why we have brought you here? To cure you! To make you sane! Will you understand, Winston, that no one whom we bring to this place ever leaves our hands uncured? We are not interested in those stupid crimes that you have committed. The Party is not interested in the overt act: the thought is all we care about. We do not merely destroy our enemies, we change them. Do you understand what I mean by that? — George Orwell

Relax," the woman said. "It's just me."
"Just you?" Hale asked with heavy irony, remembering the black leather and predator's eyes with a stab of heat. Dangerous beauty had always been his downfall.
"I'm watching your back."
"Sure you are," he snorted. Beauty or not, he wasn't stupid enough to trust. Screw, sure. Trust, no way. — Michelle O'Leary

There's no answer for my offense, just like the polythagorean theorem. — Shaquille O'Neal

O drink is mighty! secrets it unlocks, Turns hope to fact, sets cowards on to box, Takes burdens from the careworn, finds out parts In stupid folks, and teaches unknown arts. What tongue hangs fire when quickened by the bowl? What wretch so poor but wine expands his soul? — Horace

Yelling louder does not help me understand you any better! Don't be afraid of me. Come closer to me. Bring me your gentle spirit. Speak more slowly. Enunciate more clearly. Again! Please, try again. S-l-o-w down. Be kind to me. Be a safe place for me. See that I am a wounded animal, not a stupid animal. I am vulnerable and confused. Whatever my age, whatever my credentials, reach for me. Respect me. I am in here. Come find me. — Jill Bolte Taylor

You suck, surprising no one!!!! If bad was a boot, you'd fit it!!!! You're a stupid poo-poo head! I had sexual relations with your mother! Your mother was not that good in bed! You, sir, are a wretched soul! I am rubber, you are glue! — Bryan Lee O'Malley

This is an extremely foolish and stupid and idiotic kind of attitude - to expect theatres to make money. Do the public schools make money? Do libraries make money? Does the zoo make money? D o the sewers make money? It's a community service. — John Hirsch

Motormouth: So this is love? Well, love is a gift and a lot of people forget that. So you two better brace yourselves for a whole lot of ugly coming your way on a never ending train of stupid.
Penny: So you met my mom? — Mark O'Donnell

There is a point where, as a writer, you grow to hate your characters, their stupid motivations, and their whiny inner dialogues. The only solution I have found to deal with that is to kill the character, resurrect him, then kill him again. — Caris O'Malley

I can't live where I want to, I can't go where I want to go, I can't do what I want to, I can't even say what I want to. I decided I was a very stupid fool not to at least paint as I wanted to. — Georgia O'Keeffe

Still there was so much to say. How the rain never stopped. How the cold worked into your bones. Sometimes the bravest thing on earth was to sit through the night and feel the cold in your bones. Courage was not always a matter of yes or no. Sometimes it came in degrees, like the cold; sometimes you were very brave up to a point and then beyond that point you were not so brave. In certain situations you could do incredible things, you could advance toward enemy fire, but in other situations, which were not nearly so bad, you had trouble keeping your eyes open. Sometimes, like that night in the shit field, the difference between courage and cowardice was something small and stupid. — Tim O'Brien

Never invite to dinner: those who won't decide until the last minute; those who come more than half an hour late; those who want to bring along two or three friends; drunks; monologists; those who stay until three o'clock in the morning; those who think that conversation means having an argument; those who take a high moral tone; those who are stupid, ugly, or dull. Enforcement of these rules will enable one to eat alone every night in comfort. — Mason Cooley

Procrastinating is number one of my Stupid List. You still end up exactly where you didn't want to be, doing exactly what you didn't want to do, with the only difference being you lost all that time in between, during which you could have been doing something fun. Even worse, you probably stayed in a stressed-out, scrappy mood the whole time you were avoiding it. — Karen Marie Moning

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat. — P. J. O'Rourke

O'Brien: How does one man assert his power over another, Winston?
Winston: By making him suffer.
O'Brien: Exactly. By making him suffer. Obedience is not enough. Unless he is suffering, how can you be sure that he is obeying your will and not his own? Power is in inflicting pain and humiliation. Power is in tearing human minds to pieces and putting them together again in new shapes of your own choosing. Do you begin to see, then, what kind of world we are creating? It is the exact opposite of the stupid hedonistic Utopias that the old reformers imagined. A world of fear and treachery and torment, a world of trampling and being trampled upon, a world which will grow not less but MORE merciless as it refines itself. Progress in our world will be progress towards more pain. The old civilizations claimed that they were founded on love or justice. Ours is founded upon hatred. — George Orwell

I hate pride, but if I were going to be proud of anything it would have to be something I'd done myself. Race pride is kind of stupid. — Carroll O'Connor

The idea of a world where all people are alike - in wealth or in anything else - is a fantasy for the stupid. — P. J. O'Rourke

School and things that painters have taught me even keep me from painting as I want to. I decided I was a very stupid fool not to be at least paint as I wanted to and say what I wanted to when I painted as that seemed to be the only thing I could do that didn't concern anybody but myself ... I found that I could say things with colour and shapes that I couldn't say in any other way things that I had no words for. — Georgia O'Keeffe

'You're stupid,' is not something even his most severe critics usually say to President Barack Obama. — P. J. O'Rourke

And she hates being managed - that is not the word I want. What is it, Maturin?'
'Manipulated.'
'Exactly. She is a dutiful girl - a great sense of duty: I think it rather stupid, but there it is - but still she finds the way her mother has been arranging and pushing and managing and angling in all this perfectly odious. You two must have had hogsheads of that grocer's claret forced down your throats. Perfectly odious: and she is obstinate - strong, if you like - under that bread-and-butter way of hers. It will take a great deal to move her; much more than the excitement of a ball. — Patrick O'Brian

Death Will Come with Your Eyes"

Death will come with your eyes -
this death that accompanies us
from morning till night, sleepless,
deaf, like an old regret
or a stupid vice. Your eyes
will be a useless word,
a muted cry, a silence.
As you see them each morning
when alone you lean over
the mirror. O cherished hope,
that day we too shall know
that you are life and nothing.

For everyone death has a look.
Death will come with your eyes.
It will be like terminating a vice,
as seen in the mirror
a dead face re-emerging,
like listening to closed lips.
We'll go down the abyss in silence. — Cesare Pavese

People think I don't like interviews but I don't mind speaking about proper and interesting stuff. When it's stupid stuff to build your image and you are told to mention this and mention that, I hate it. — Ronnie O'Sullivan

Everyone acts stupid at some time in order to be loved. — Tim O'Brien

He had known it often enough. A delightful child, even a delightful early adolescent, interested in everything, alive,affectionate, would turn into a thick, heavy, stupid brute and never recover: ageing men would become wholly self-centered, indifferent to those who had been their friends, avaricious — Patrick O'Brian

Okay," I said, "so what does all that have to do with his dead mistress, her dead ex-boyfriend with the dirty pictures or the entire Rossetti crime family?" Trixie shrugged. "I dunno, let's go ask him." "Ask who?" I said, a little lost. "Roger Mayfield," she said simply. "Isn't that what I wanted to do at nine o'clock in the morning?" I asked, annoyed. "Nine thirty-seven," she reminded. "And there's a difference." "Which is?" I asked. "When you wanted to do it, it was a stupid idea," she said with a smile. — Gregg Taylor

O'Reilly," he murmured. "He'd be fuckin' crazy not to want you there. Every day. Every night."
Against my arm, his heart thumped.
"He'd be stupid not to want to wake up to your wicked green eyes. Those eyes that make him feel like he's paid his dues. Like he's finally finished with living off God's fucking redemption crumbs. — Mel Bossa

Ohmigod, I moan, clutching my stomach. I'm sure I'm going to be sick. I'm going to become an exhibitionist vomiter.
My heart is back to beating - racing, actually - as a new level beyond mortification slams into me. I sounded just like the actress in that awful video of Ben's that Kacey made me watch over the summer. Literally. I accidently walked in on those weirdos watching it one night. Kacey took that as an opportunity to pin me down on the couch while Trent, Dan, and Ben howled with laughter at my flaming cheeks and horrified shrieks.
My sister is the Antichrist. This is all her fault. Hers and Stayner's. And those stupid Jell-O shooters. — K.A. Tucker

People in England talk about stupid Hollywood idiots, but the industry attracts some of the cleverest people in the world. — Chris O'Dowd

I could start this review by stating that Dumb and Dumberer lives up to its name, or by calling it stupid, moronic, and idiotic, but I believe that approach is a trap, since a movie like this might relish being the object of such bland invectives. Instead, let me try a few that can't possibly be misconstrued as twisted praise: unfunny, boring, torturous, and unwatchable ... [N]o movie could be more aptly compared to raw sewage than this film - Directed By Troy Miller. — James Berardinelli

Automobiles are free of egotism, passion, prejudice and stupid ideas about where to have dinner. They are, literally, selfless. A world designed for automobiles instead of people would have wider streets, larger dining rooms, fewer stairs to climb and no smelly, dangerous subway stations. — P. J. O'Rourke

Twenty-five years from now all religion will be fundamentalist religion, even the Church of England. Wild-eyed "Tutuist" Anglicans will riot in Anzania (formerly the Union of South Africa). They'll force people to play contract bridge at gunpoint and make unbelievers eat little sandwiches with the crusts cut off. No woman will dare appear in the street without a small, stupid hat like Queen Di's. — P. J. O'Rourke

Procrastinating is number three on my Stupid List. You still end up exactly where you didn't want to be, doing exactly what you didn't want to do, withe the only difference being that you lost all that time in between, during which you could have been doing something fun. Even worse, you probably stayed in a stressed-out, crappy mood the whole time you were avoiding it. If you know something is inevitable, do it and get it over with. Move on. Life is short. — Karen Marie Moning

Doing something stupid once is just plain stupid. Doing something stupid twice is a philosophy. — Dan O'Neill

It's important to have a buddy like that. Somebody who'll stop you from doing that really stupid thing you were gonna do just because you couldn't think of anything better.
unidentified soldier, eulogizing his dead buddy — Henry V. O'Neil

The reason I didn't like cocaine is it made me do stupid things, have stupid conversations, and stay awake until 11 o'clock in the morning unable to think, read, sleep or speak. — Moby

It hapens very often that parents think they are worred about the progress a boy is making. they do not realise that all boys are numskulls with o branes which is not surprising when you look at the parents really the whole thing goes on and on and there is no stoping it it is a vicious circle. — Geoffrey Willans

It was five o'clock when the stupid rooster started crowing relentlessly, robbing me of my sleep. The sun hadn't even risen yet. Dumbass bird should be on Prozac. — Alison Bliss

Government subsidies can be critically analyzed according to a simple principle: You are smarter than the government, so when the government pays you to do something you wouldn't do on your own, it is almost always paying you to do something stupid. — P. J. O'Rourke

A friend of mine at the American Enterprise Institute says there are two parties: the silly party and the stupid party. I'm too old for the silly party, so I had to join the stupid party. — P. J. O'Rourke

My working hypothesis is that stupidity in popular culture is a constant. Popular culture cannot get more stupid. — P. J. O'Rourke

When you look at the number of stupid people who have succeeded in business, you clearly don't have to be very bright. Business is all about getting your sales up and your costs down, the bit in the middle is profit. — Michael O'Leary

[T]o really try to be informed and literate today is to feel stupid nearly all the time, and to need help. — David Foster Wallace

All my stupid little thoughts beget stupid little thoughts, rampantly speculating every possible outcome of every possible situation until they're all done to death and none of them could ever be true. — Bryan Lee O'Malley

When I was a kid, I wanted to be serious, like Daniel Day-Lewis. No one really dreams of being a comic actor, do they? Now I realise how stupid that is - and it's because comic acting isn't taken seriously enough. It's a discipline. You know instantly - either you're funny and getting the laughs, or you're not. — Chris O'Dowd

Stupid is a great force in human affairs. — P. J. O'Rourke

Dalmatians are not only superior to other dogs, they are like all dogs, infinitely less stupid than men. — Eugene O'Neill

They are just really stupid people in Hollywood. You write them a script, and they say they love it, they absolutely love it. Then they say, 'But doesn't it need a small dog, and an Eskimo, and shouldn't it be set in New Guinea?' And you say, 'But it is a sophisticated romantic comedy set in Paris.' — P. J. O'Rourke

The free market is ugly and stupid, like going to the mall; the unfree market is just as ugly and just as stupid, except there is nothing in the mall and if you don't go there they shoot you. — P. J. O'Rourke

I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've done as a 'learning experience.' It makes me feel less stupid. — P. J. O'Rourke

I wish to Heaven I was married," she said resentfully as she attacked the yams with loathing. "I'm tired of everlastingly being unnatural and never doing anything I want to do. I'm tired of acting like I don't eat more than a bird, and walking when I want to run and saying I feel faint after a waltz, when I could dance for two days and never get tired. I'm tired of saying, 'How wonderful you are!' to fool men who haven't got one-half the sense I've got, and I'm tired of pretending I don't know anything, so men can tell me things and feel important while they're doing it ... I can't eat another bite. — Margaret Mitchell

Bring the heat, bring the stupid. It was the Army way. — Kathleen O'Reilly

I dinna like this, Rob,' said a Feegle. 'It's too quiet.'
'Aye, Slightly Sane Georgie, it is that-'
'You are my sunshine, my only su-'
'Daft Wullie!' snapped Rob, without taking his eyes off the strange landscape.
The singing stopped. 'Aye, Rob?' said Daft Wullie from behind him.
'Ye ken I said I'd tell ye when ye wuz guilty o' stupid and inna-pro-pre-ate behavior?'
'Aye, Rob,' said Daft Wullie. 'That wuz another one o' those times, wuz it?'
'Aye. — Terry Pratchett

After the first glass of vodka
you can accept just about anything
of life even your own mysteriousness
you think it is nice that a box
of matches is purple and brown and is called La Petite and comes from Sweden
for they are words that you know and that is all you know words not their feelings or what they mean and you write because you know them not because you understand them because you don't you are stupid and lazy and will never be great but you do what you know because what else is there? — Frank O'Hara

We think they should pay €60 for being so stupid. — Michael O'Leary

Are we napping?" she asked.
"For a little," he said.
He wasn't napping. He concentrated every cell of his body on memorizing the weight of her against him, and the smell of her hair in the sun. His arms measured the slender curve of her torso. His fingers separated out a single strand of her hair. Her breathing slowed, easing, while his watchful heart chugged on, stupid and hungry, and the red bracelet stayed in his pocket. — Caragh M. O'Brien

Stupid men, always thinking they're the ones who get to do the rescuing. — Peadar O'Guilin