Stephine Plum Quotes & Sayings

What time is it?" Lula asked. "I might need a doughnut. Is it doughnut time?"
"I'm thinking about eating healthier," I said. "More vegetables and fewer doughnuts."
"What's that about?"
"I don't know. It just came over me."
"It's a bad idea. What do I look like, Mr. Green Jeans? How would it sound if I said it's vegetable time? People would think I was a nut. Nobody gets a craving for a vegetable. And I'm the one on the diet. What am I gonna do with one carrot or one asparagus? They are not mood enhancers, if you see what I'm saying."
"I see what you're saying, but there aren't any doughnuts between here and Ernie's house."
"I guess I could wait. And maybe you're right about the healthy eating. I'm gonna get a carrot cake doughnut. — Janet Evanovich

Great men or men of great gifts you shall easily find, but symmetrical men never. — Ralph Waldo Emerson

What's with the super soaker?" -Stephine
"I had a stork of genius when you called me this morning I said what do I have to do to protect myself from the vampire? And the answer that came to me was holy water! I don't know why I didn't think of this sooner." -Lula
"You have the Super Soaker filled with holy water?" -Stephine
"Yeah I sucked it out of the church. You know that birdbath thing they got right up front?" -Lula
"THe baptismal font?" -Stephine
"That's it. They got it filled with holy water, free for the taking." -Lula
"Brilliant." -Stephine — Janet Evanovich

You never knew anybody completely. Not even yourself. — Michelle Dalton

Everything is bilateral in the domain of thought. Ideas are binary. Janus is the myth of criticism and the symbol of genius. Only God is triangular! — Honore De Balzac

Be careful to not haul around in our lives so many nice but unnecessary things that we are distracted and diverted from the things that truly matter most. — David A. Bednar

It is possible that a man could live twice as long if he didn't spend the first half of his life acquiring habits that shortens the other half — Socrates

There is no group of Americans more pessimistic than working-class whites. Well over half of blacks, Latinos, and college-educated whites expect that their children will fare better economically than they have. Among working-class whites, only 44 percent share that expectation. — J.D. Vance

Keep growing. Stay awake. Beware of gurus. Keep a low overhead. — Joan Larkin

The words of my book are nothing, the drift of it everything. — Walt Whitman

Opening my door to Dillon Ruddick, my bulding super. I handed him a cup of coffee. "Sorry about the blood."
"What was it this time?" No one reported gunfire."
"I hit a guy in the face with a hair dryer."
"Whoa." Dillon said.
"It wasn't my fault," I told him.
"Maybe we should lay down some linoleum here. It would make things easier for clean up. — Janet Evanovich

Now that we know you're not a hundred percent vampire you should stop trying to suck necks," I said to Ziggy.
"I'll try," Ziggy said, "but it's a hard habit to break. — Janet Evanovich

I was in my room, sitting on the Goddamn floor, setting up my new computer when I heard yelling from the living room.
I went out to check what the fuck was happening. The last thing I expected to see was Amanda sitting on Ethan, while he was on his back on the floor. She was slapping the shit out of his head while he was yelling at her to stop.
What the fuck?
I didn't know whether to laugh, cheer, leave, or throw money at them. — Jay McLean

I smell vampire" -Lula
"You're a Nut" -Stephine
"Well I smell something." -Lula
"Mold." -Stephine
"Yeah. I smell moldy vampire" -Lula — Janet Evanovich

Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. — Corey Ford