Squirted Quotes & Sayings

Raven mumbled something. "Eh? What was that? Speak up! Don't mumble like a caterpillar." "I said, I don't want to scare them." Baba Yaga picked up a blue spray bottle and squirted Raven in the face with water, making Raven blink. "This is how I train my cats not to jump up on my spell table. They learn after a while. Maybe you will, too. — Shannon Hale

I very carefully levered up an eyelid and shut it again fast. A merciless sunbeam had squirted straight in, making my brain bleed. — Kyril Bonfiglioli

Do not vie with others in the accumulation of wealth. Vie with them in Ibadaah. — Al-Shafi'i

Ah," said Mr Jesmond, "but Christmas in England is a great institution and I assure you at Kings Lacey you would see it at its best. It's a wonderful old house, you know. Why, one wing of it dates from the fourteenth century."

Again Poirot shivered. The thought of a fourteenth-century English manor house filled him with apprehension. He had suffered too often in the historic country houses of England. He looked round appreciatively at his comfortable modern flat with its radiators and the latest patent devices for excluding any kind of draught.

"In the winter," he said firmly, "I do not leave London. — Agatha Christie

Pain skewered his guts again, and fresh blood squirted out into his hand. It felt like warm jelly. He put his head back — Stephen King

No. Look, the mutual tug paid extra." Dante mimed jerking and squirting without looking embarrassed, which only made Griff more embarrassed. "And the
stuff you did at the end bumped our fee even - "
"I know, man. Sorry about - "
" - more. Bullshit, sorry! Blowing your jazz on me got us a three hundred dollar bonus. Didja know that?" Dante rolled his eyes and waved away the worry.
"Dude, if I could get a fee every time you squirted on me, I'd camp under your bed and have you doing it three times a day."
Help me, Jesus.
Griff's eyes honest-to-God bugged at that. — Damon Suede

I write. I imagine. The act of imagining in itself enlivens me. I am not frozen and paralyzed before the predator. I invent characters. At times I feel as if I am digging up people from the ice in which reality enshrouded them, but maybe, more than anything else, it is myself that I am now digging up. — David Grossman

No," he said, "look, it's very, very simple ... all I want ... is a cup of tea. You are going to make one for me. Keep quiet and listen." And he sat. He told the Nutri-Matic about India, he told it about China, he told it about Ceylon. He told it about broad leaves drying in the sun. He told it about silver teapots. He told it about summer afternoons on the lawn. He told it about putting in the milk before the tea so it wouldn't get scalded. He even told it (briefly) about the history of the East India Company.
"So that's it, is it?" said the Nutri-Matic when he had finished.
"Yes," said Arthur, "that is what I want."
"You want the taste of dried leaves in boiled water?"
"Er, yes. With milk."
"Squirted out of a cow?"
"Well, in a manner of speaking I suppose ... — Douglas Adams

But as much as Greyson's overly warm body had to be worked around and compensated for in summer, at that moment she was eternally and ridiculously grateful for it. She almost thought she heard her own skin sizzle when it came into contact with his: some of the cramping in her muscles relaxed.
Only to tense up again when she saw, through her half-closed eyes, Greyson's second gaurd and Malleus's brother, Maleficarum, advancing on her with a hypodermic needle. Something clear squirted ominously from it's sharp silver tip.
"Oh, no," she managed, "You are not giving me a shot."
"'Sonly under the skin, m'lady. You'll barely even feel it, honest." Maleficarum's features did no do "innocent" well: he looked like a serial killer trying to hide a severed head behind his back. — Stacia Kane

There was water and waves all around. They ran towered the shore, and made way for the boat as it ran through. At the back of the boat, water squirted out and some of it was white.
It was magical. — Jesse Haubert

I'll wash. Looks like brute strength is required."

Matilda wasn't about to argue. Might as well put those ridiculous muscles to good use. "I doubt I could write them into submission somehow."

"No," Tanner agreed, heading to the sink and flicking on the taps, intent on filling the industrial size sink and agitating the water as he squirted in some detergent. "You could, however, write about how I heroically and uncomplainingly scrubbed pots for hours while being witty and charming all at the service of some of the city's less fortunate."

"You want me to add in how woodland animals came in from the alley to befriend you? — Amy Andrews

Paper Matches
My aunts washed dishes while the uncles
squirted each other on the lawn with
garden hoses. Why are we in here,
I said, and they are out there?
That's the way it is,
said Aunt Hetty, the shriveled-up one.
I have the rages that small animals have,
being small, being animal.
Written on me was a message,
"At Your Service,"
like a book of paper matches.
One by one we were taken out
and struck.
We come bearing supper,
our heads on fire. — Paulette Jiles

Scarlett lived by the (thankfully) ancient medical creed: If it tastes awful and smells worse, it's probably good for you.
Julia wasn't so sure about that. She lived by the edict: If it tastes awful and smells worse, leave it the hell alone. On the other hand, if it tasted good and smelled better, you either ate it, squirted it on your neck or fucked it.
It hadn't led her wrong so far. — Amy Andrews

One day, young "Dr." Welch, decked out in his fancy suit, got into his new convertible. He proceeded to put the top down and was promptly squirted with dark, grungy oil that ruined both his suit and the paint job on his beloved car. "There I was, thinking I was larger than life, and smack came the reminder that brought me back to reality. It was a great lesson. — Carol S. Dweck

I believe in celebrating the female figure and embracing what we've been given, not hiding that. — Miranda Kerr

Once the quietness arrived, it stayed and spread in Estha. It reached out of his head and enfolded him in its swampy arms. It rocked him to the rhythm of an ancient, fetal heartbeat. It sent its stealthy, suckered tentacles inching along the insides of his skull, hoovering the knolls and dells of his memory; dislodging old sentences, whisking them off the tip of his tongue. It stripped his thoughts of the words that described them and left them pared and naked. Unspeakable. Numb. And to an observer therefore, perhaps barely there. Slowly, over the years, Estha withdrew from the world. He grew accustomed to the uneasy octopus that lived inside him and squirted its inky tranquilizer on his past. Gradually the reason for his silence was hidden away, entombed somewhere deep in the soothing folds of the fact of it. — Arundhati Roy

While Hannah was busy positioning the laptop and shimmying out of her shorts and a thong, I pushed off my boxers and squirted lube into my palm. I glanced at my cock. It stood stiffly from me, nine thick, smooth inches for which I didn't thank God often enough. — M. Pierce

The Greek religion explained that diffuse band of light in the night sky as the milk of Hera, squirted from her breast across the heavens, a legend that is the origin of the phrase Westerners still use - the Milky Way. — Carl Sagan

Only just now awakening after years of materialism, our soul is still infected with the despair born of unbelief, of lack of purpose and aim. — Wassily Kandinsky

Debbie Downer was one of the few sketches where I broke, and I remember watching Heratio Sanz laugh so hard that tears squirted out of his eyes. I still believe that sketch may be a cure for low-level depression if watched regularly. — Amy Poehler

Knowing God can significantly increase your abilities and take away your limitations. — Sunday Adelaja

Blood squirted as his transected femoral artery haemorrhaged to the rhythm of his horrible heart.
- From Potter's Field — Patricia Cornwell

More than two decades after the birth of Louise Brown, and all the hysteria that surrounded her 'test tube' conception, we should know that institutions, not technologies, create dystopias. Artificially conceived children are everywhere, beloved by their parents, and they haven't radically altered our world. — Virginia Postrel

Standing in the beam of refrigerator light, Malcolm squirted ketchup into his mouth.
"He's ... visiting," I said.
Vincent narrowed his eyes and his voice took on a fatherly tone. "Why's he here at midnight?"
Malcolm licked the inside of a mustard lid, then said, "I'm here at midnight because I'm fulfilling Katrina's desire. — Suzanne Selfors

After crossing herself, she lay back on the divan and squirted a cool puddle of hand lotion from the bottle she'd brought from London. Invariably she would apply too much, and her hands would be slick and shiny in the candlelight as she asked for another pair with which to share the excess. — Anthony Marra

Just then, just when I thought I would be free from the repeated blows to my tender head of the Stupidity Hammer, the Stupidity Hammer rose up from the shining screen, drew back, whirled hugely, and with great force and might and main slammed me right between the eyes so my brain squirted out my ears a yard past my shoulders in both directions.
Bilbo does not seal the barrels.
I will wait for you to recover in case you just got the sensation of a Stupidity Hammer clonking you from the page. Then I will repeat myself, because it is so dumb you might not believe me:
Bilbo does not seal the barrels. He leaves the tops open.
The Desolation of Tolkien — John C. Wright

You should assume that your networks are plagued with malevolent entities ready to unleash their ire on a whim. — Sam Newman

There is but One God, His name is Truth, He is the Creator, He fears none, he is without hate, He never dies, He is beyond the cycle of births and death, He is self illuminated, He is realized by the kindness of the True Guru. He was True in the beginning, He was True when the ages commenced and has ever been True, He is also True now. — Guru Nanak

An entire greased-up baby being squirted out of a gay biker's asshole during a weird gay biker sex ritual. I guess the word weird isn't really necessary there. — Anonymous

Ignore death up to the last moment; then, when it can't be ignored any longer, have yourself squirted full of morphia and shuffle off in a coma. Thoroughly sensible, humane and scientific, eh? — Aldous Huxley

The store was filled with hollow-eyed people standing in line: at the sandwich counter, at the soda fountain, at the register. All of them waiting, waiting, their hands full of candy, chips, cups of coffee, money. It was like purgatory, with snacks. Not just the customers; the employees, too. They worked the registers, squirted ketchup on hot dogs, piled limp lettuce onto flaccid lunch meat and waited for it to be over, waited until they could go home. — Kelly Braffet

My take on all these things is pretty simple. It's all on the table, every bit of it, and you should use anything that improves the quality of your wiring and doesn't get in the way of your story. If you like an alliterative phrases-the knights of nowhere battling the nabobs of nullity-by all means throw it in and see how it looks on paper. If it seems to work, it can stay. If it doesn't (and to me this one sounds pretty bad, like Spiro Agnew crossed with Robert Jordan), well that delete key is on your machine for a good reason. — Stephen King

Now - Ten thousand, and ten thousand times ten thousand (for matter and motion are infinite) are the ways by which a hat may be dropped upon the ground, without any effect. - Had he flung it, or thrown it, or cast it, or skimmed it, or squirted, or let it slip or fall in any possible direction under heaven, - or in the best direction that could be given to it, - had he dropped it like a goose - like a puppy - like an ass - or in doing it, or even after he had done, had he looked like a fool, - like a ninny - like a nicompoop - it had fail'd, and the effect upon the heart had been lost. — Laurence Sterne