Spy Humor Quotes & Sayings

the essential vice, the utmost evil, is Pride. Unchastity, anger, greed, drunkenness, and all that, are mere fleabites in comparison: it was through Pride that the devil became the devil: Pride leads to every other vice: it is the complete anti-God state of mind. Does — C.S. Lewis

Sitting for even five minutes with a journal offers a rare cease-fire in the battle of daily life. — Alexandra Johnson

Every time I walk by a spy shop, I think that I need to put some surveillance on somebody. Rick's been acting fishy! I need to buy a safe that looks like a Spray 'N Wash can. "Hey, Mitch, can I use the Spray 'N Wash?" "Yeah, if you want to spray your shirt with documents!" — Mitch Hedberg

I tell you, I'm half tempted to break into CIA custody just so I can break Joe Solomon out of CIA custody just so I can break Joe Solomon — Ally Carter Only The Good Spy Young

Are you French?' I asked instead.

'Oui!'

Foreign. Foreign spy. French Communist Party acted on Stalin's instructions during part of World War II. French Communist spy.

Stop it stop it stop it

I turned to Art, a black kid who was a foot and a half taller than me and whose pecs were about to burst of his shirt and eat someone. I gave him a two on the delusion detector. I didn't trust those pecs.

'Hi,' he rumbled.

I waved weakly. — Francesca Zappia

You know, you're just sitting with Chevy, then you're doing a scene with him and acting, and all of a sudden you go, 'Omigod, that's Chevy Chase!' And then you've got to keep acting. 'Danny, your lines? Your lines ... ? You've got to keep going!' 'Oh, sorry, sorry!' — Danny Pudi

Now I proudly call myself a feminist. If Tip O'Neill were alive today, I might even tell him that I'm a pom-pom girl for feminism. I hope more women, and men, will join me in accepting this distinguished label. Currently, only 24 percent of women in the United States say that they consider themselves feminists. Yet when offered a more specific definition of feminism - "A feminist is someone who believes in social, political, and economic equality of the sexes" - the percentage of women who agree rises to 65 percent.16 That's a big move in the right direction. — Sheryl Sandberg

What's a political?"
"Like a spy, but on your own side," said Maladict — Terry Pratchett

An oyster, that marvel of delicacy, that concentration of sapid excellence, that mouthful bwefore all other mouthfuls, who first had faith to believe it, and courage to execute? The exterior is not persuasive. — Henry Ward Beecher

There is no doubt that it is more difficult to read and more difficult to write but I still manage. — Colleen McCullough

And I thought, my God, there's an off chance that they will say something that's really worth preserving and there is one way to do that and I knew what it was because I come from television. — James Lipton

The weapon of nonviolence does not need supermen or superwomen to wield it; even beings of common clay can use it and have used it before this with success. — Mahatma Gandhi

I care more about the people than about the company. That's why I don't want to own it. I don't want to run a business. People do it better than I do. — Karl Lagerfeld

We what? Walk around the city seven times in seven days and blow our trumpets? Forgive me, my Commander, but what is that going to do, kill them with laughter?" The other commanders snickered. Joshua chose not to be angry. He thought it was rather silly himself. "Our god has quite a sense of humor, does he not? But nevertheless, he did tell me that is what we should do. So, unless you have a better idea than Yahweh, Salmon, I suggest we obey him and see his salvation." Salmon was duly chastised. "Forgive my offense, commander." Joshua said with a smile, "You are forgiven, Salmon. You are too good of a spy." Caleb was impressed with Joshua's temperament. His sense of holiness would normally be offended at remarks like that. Perhaps he was beginning to appreciate Yahweh's sense of humor after all. Joshua ended his remarks, "And remember, Commanders, avoid the home with the scarlet rope. Caleb and Salmon, you will be responsible for Rahab's deliverance. — Brian Godawa

The most temptation I'd experienced had been with Tomas, the Senate's spy who had been feeding off me without permission, and Mircea, who was probably plotting some nefarious scheme. I have no taste in men. — Karen Chance

The room fell silent. I frankly didn't know what I was going to do to help Eduardo, but I had the sense that he was right- no one else could help him, and without help, all that he'd done would crumble.
Plus, I like being called his only hope. I felt like Obi-Wan Kenobi. — Tod Goldberg

You must love beyond the difference of all religions, all nations, and all races. You are originally one. — Ryuho Okawa

If you'd told me even a year before ... that I'd wind up whispering my sins in the confessional or on my knees saying the rosary, I would've laughed myself cockeyed. More likely pastime?Pole dancer. International spy. Drug mule. Assassin.
I drive under a sky black as graphite to meet my new spiritual director ... a bulky Franciscan nun named Sister Margaret, patiently going blind behind fish-tank glasses that magnify her eyes like goggles. — Mary Karr

Blake took a small roll from the tray on the table, then put it back in favor of a larger one. And maybe a little butter. It certainly couldn't hurt. And jam ... no, he drew the line at jam. She was a spy, after all. — Julia Quinn

If I wanted to change my life then I'd have to do it myself. Because no one was coming to protect me, or save me, or heal me. — J.A. Huss

That cat was a spy. You had to take a pot shot at it. It was a very clever German midget dressed up in a cheap fur coat. — J.D. Salinger

every predator loves easy prey. Her lip curled, baring fangs that there was no one there to see. Because she wasn't prey. In the vamp world, she was pretty much the apex predator, the mongoose to his snake. And she was about to Rikki Tikki Tavi his ass. Dory — Karen Chance

The rewards go to the risk-takers, those who are willing to put their egos on the line and reach out to other people and to a richer, fuller life for themselves. — Susan RoAne

If this were some kind of entertainment, this would be roughly the point where Rupert said, "We don't have any more time, Professor, you must complete your research as soon as possible," but there was no great sense of urgency, no sense that it even mattered. It was just something that Rudi was interested in, for his own reasons. They could be working on this for years and still not understand it, and it wouldn't make a blind bit of difference.
He said, "Look, Professor, a lot of effort went into getting you that information. We'd be grateful if you could make some kind of sense of it reasonably soon.
"There is one thing I can tell you right now," Lev said..."Whoever is running this thing, they're really interested in railways. — Dave Hutchinson

You want me to be your spy in a game of restaurant espionage? Will I need a code name?"
"It's nothing morally reprehensible or anything, " Wes hastened to assure her. "Just curiosity."
"I think your code name should be Tiberius," she said decisively. "I'll be Uhura."
"Tiberius? As in James Tiberius Kirk?" Wes blinked, then grinned. "Oh my God, this is your version of flirting. How do you say 'I fancy you' in Klingon? — Louisa Edwards

In thinking about religion and society in the 21st century, we should broaden the conversation about faith from doctrinal debates to the larger question of how it might inspire us to strengthen the bonds of belonging that redeem us from our solitude, helping us to construct together a gracious and generous social order. — Jonathan Sacks

Ben starts. "I Spy with my little eye something I really like."
"Oh I know," Radar says. "It's the taste of balls."
"No."
"Is it the taste of penises?" I guess.
"No, dumbass."
"Hmm," says Radar. "Is it the smell of balls?"
"The texture of balls? — John Green