Sookie Quotes & Sayings

Your brother's car has been found," he told Jay Marriot. "It's on a little road almost directly across from Sookie's driveway." ... Eric had told me that that little road, a dirt track leading back to a deer camp, was where Debbie Pelt had hidden her car when she'd come to kill me. Might as well put up a sign: PARKING FOR SOOKIE STACKHOUSE NIGHTTIME ATTACKS. — Charlaine Harris

Oh. No wonder I'd been sick. I hadn't eaten anything since then. I'm a girl who likes her meals, so it hadn't been a weight-loss tactic. I'd just been too busy bumping from crisis to crisis. Go on the Sookie Stackhouse Narrow Avoidance of Death Diet! Run for your life, and miss meals, too! Exercise plus starvation. — Charlaine Harris

Better to be screwed physically than financially. — Charlaine Harris

Glass shattered, vampires roared, humans screamed. The noise battered at me, just as the tidal wave of scores of brains at high gear washed over me. When it began to taper off, I looked up into Eric's eyes. Incredibly, he was excited. He smiled at me. "I knew I'd get on top of you somehow," he said.
Are you trying to make me mad so I'll forget how scared I am?"
No, I'm just opportunistic."
I wiggled, trying to get out from under him, and he said, "Oh, do that again. It felt great. — Charlaine Harris

Once again, I had that feeling of drowning when I hadn't even known I was in the pool — Charlaine Harris

As I climbed up into the high old bed, the large fly in my personal ointment did the same. Had I actually told him he could get in bed with me? Well, I decided, as I wriggled down under the soft old sheets and the blanket and the comforter, if Eric had designs on me, I was just too tired to care.
"Woman?"
"Hmmm?"
"What's your name?"
"Sookie. Sookie Stackhouse."
"Thank you, Sookie."
"Welcome, Eric. — Charlaine Harris

You can get more skilled, Sookie, but can't get any better. — Charlaine Harris

Sookie, you really are smarter than anyone gives you credit for being. — Charlaine Harris

I hate her skinny thighs and her elitist attitude. i hope she's a dreadful bitch who makes you so miserable that you howl when you remember me. — Charlaine Harris

How is Eric?'
'Very tightly wound. Plus, a lot of stuff happened that he'll tell you about.'
'Thanks for the warning. I'll go to the house now. You're my favorite breather.'
'Oh. Well ... great.'
She hung up. — Charlaine Harris

Ha," I said. "Oh, ha-ha. Yeah, 'cause they love me. You see how many vampires are up here? Zero, right?"
One," said Eric, stepping out of the stairwell. — Charlaine Harris

I had never realized a woman could have to struggle to keep her hands off a man, but here I was, digging my nails into my palms, staring at the inside of my eyelids as though I could maybe see through them if I peered hard enough. — Charlaine Harris

Though I was standing in front of a mirror, I wasn't really seeing my reflection. I was seeing, very clearly, that - at the moment - I was all in the world that Eric could think of as his own. I had better not fail him. — Charlaine Harris

Dated" in Selah's book, being a euphemism for "had enthusiastic and frequent sex with". — Charlaine Harris

How grateful are you?" he whispered, his mouth hovering over mine. His eyes were very alert now, and his gaze was boring into mine.
"That kind of ruins it, when you say something like that," I said, trying to keep my voice gentle. "You shouldn't want me to have sex with you just because I owe you."
"I don't really care why you have sex with me, as long as you do it," he said, equally gently. — Charlaine Harris

Love them to death. Sookie to Pam — Charlaine Harris

As the water pounded on my back, I reflected that I must be pretty simple. It didn't take much to make me happy. A long night with a dead guy had done the trick. — Charlaine Harris

Vampires, bringing America together! — Charlaine Harris

Woo woo, secret vampire stuff! — Charlaine Harris

I snuck a look to see how Eric was taking this, and he was staring at me the same way the Monroe vampires had. Thoughtful. Hungry.
"That's interesting," he said. "I had a psychic once. It was incredible."
"Did the psychic think so? — Charlaine Harris

Sookie is about as radically different from me and a lot of the work I've previously done as you could possibly come up with. — Anna Paquin

Sookie: Hey, our hair's the same color.
Eric: Sure is, Girlfriend. — Charlaine Harris

Sweetheart," Bill said formally, "I have always loved you, and I will be proud to die in your service. When I'm gone, say a prayer for me in a real church. — Charlaine Harris

Oklahoma is very beautiful, and Eric loves beauty, but he already has that in you. — Charlaine Harris

You trust me?" Eric sounded surprised.
"Yes."
"That's ... crazy, Sookie. — Charlaine Harris

Well in two months, it'd be sunbathing time. That made me smile. I enjoyed lying in the sun in a little bikini, timing myself carefully so I didn't burn. I loved the smell of coconut oil. And I don't want to hear any lectures about how bad tanning is for you. That's my vice. Everybody gets one. — Charlaine Harris

They found the corpse in the closet of Alcide's apartment, and they hatched a plan to hide his remains." Eric sounded like that had been kind of cute of us.
"My Sookie hid a corpse?"
"I don't think you can be too sure about that possessive pronoun."
"Where did you learn that term, Northman?"
"I took 'English as a Second Language' at a community college in the seventies. — Charlaine Harris

I stroked Eric's hair, tucking some behind his ear. His eyes on mine were intent, and I knew he was waiting for me to speak. "I wish," I said, "I could save orgasms in a jar for when i need them, because I think I had a few extra."
Eric's eyes widened, and all of a sudden he roared with laughter.
(Dead to the World) — Charlaine Harris

As far as I could tell, Claude's benefit to the world was strictly as a decoration.
-Sookie — Charlaine Harris

A year ago,' I said, 'you wouldn't have asked this of me.'
'A year ago,' he answered, 'you wouldn't have hesitated to drink.'
I crossed to the desk and tossed it down. — Charlaine Harris

But in my book, it was basically bad taste to stare at someone's assets, no matter how much on display they were. — Charlaine Harris

Did we have sex?" he asked directly.
For about two minutes, this might actually be fun. "Eric," I said, "we had sex in every position I could imagine, and some I couldn't. We had sex in every room in my house, and we had sex outdoors. You told me it was the best you'd ever had." (At the time he couldn't recall all the sex he'd ever had. But he'd paid me a compliment.) "Too bad you can't remember it," I concluded with a modest smile.
Eric looked like I'd hit him in the forehead with a mallet. For all of thirty seconds his reaction was completely gratifying. — Charlaine Harris

Life begins at night — Charlaine Harris

In this age of vampires, what I love about 'True Blood' the most is that it's a post-modern take on it. 'Sookie Stackhouse' series author Charlaine Harris and 'True Blood' creator Alan Ball turned that whole mythology upside-down ... It's not just about vampires. It's about a lot of different things. — Michelle Forbes

Was I just curious about what the agenda might be at a vampire summit? Did I want the attention of more undead members of society? Did I want to be known as a fangbanger, one of those humans who simply adored the walking dead? Did some corner of me long for a chance to be near Bill without seeking him out, still trying to make some emotional sense
of his betrayal? Or was this about Eric? Unbeknownst to myself, was I in love with the flamboyant Viking who was so handsome, so good at making love, and so political, all atthe same time?
This sounded like a promising set of problems for a soap opera season. — Charlaine Harris

No, I like you alive and warm and wiggling. — Charlaine Harris

I was surprised to find out there was a direct line from my palm to my, my, hootchie. — Charlaine Harris

Bubba made a sound of disapproval "You're not supposed to be kissing on anybody else, Miss Sookie" he said "Bill said it was okay, but I don't like it. — Charlaine Harris

You are speaking of my future lover. Be more respectful. — Charlaine Harris

By the way, I haven't heard an 'I'm sorry' from you yet." My sense of grievance had overwhelmed my sense of self-preservation.
I am sorry that the maenad picked on you."
I glared at him. "Not enough," I said. I was trying hard to hang on to this conversation.
Angelic Sookie, vision of love and beauty, I am prostrate that the wicked evil maenad violated your smooth and voluptuous body, in an attempt to deliver a message to me."
That's more like it. — Charlaine Harris

They say there's no harm in daydreaming, but there is. — Charlaine Harris

I don't like having feelings, Eric said coldly, and he left.
That was a tough exit line to top. — Charlaine Harris

This letter is written on the skin of one of the water sprites who drowned your parents.'
'Ick!' I cried, and dropped the letter on the kitchen table. — Charlaine Harris

You were so sweet when you didn't know who you were. — Charlaine Harris

Sookie," Eric said. I didn't think he'd heard a word. "Yield to me."
Well, that was pretty direct. — Charlaine Harris

I felt like I'd culturally arrived when a character on the HBO show 'True Blood' was reading a hardback of 'Heartsick' at Sookie's kitchen table. — Chelsea Cain

I am so over Sookie and her precious fairy vagina and her unbelievably stupid name. - Pam — Charlaine Harris

Lily might be icy on the outside, but inside she was Vesuvius. — Charlaine Harris

Sookie, what have we done? And to whom?"
"I killed a chicken. And I cooked it."
"Sookie, Sookie. My bullshit meter is reading that as a false."
-Eric Northman, Sookie Stackhouse — Charlaine Harris

This was pretty exotic stuff for a telepathic barmaid from northern Louisiana. — Charlaine Harris

Amelia was sitting on the pavement in her lawn chair, a glass of wine in her hand.
When we emerged, she set the glass down very carefully on the ground and then looked us over from head to toe.
'Okay, don't know how to react,' she said, finally. — Charlaine Harris

Sookie is always in distress, it wouldn't be 'True Blood' if someone wasn't trying to kill her. — Anna Paquin

I hate witches. Humans had the right idea, burning them at the stake. — Charlaine Harris

Eric: if Sookie had died, I would let you suffer.
Bill: if Sookie had died, I would already be dead. — Charlaine Harris

If there were an international butt competition, Eric would win, hands down - or cheeks up. — Charlaine Harris

( ... ) that the creature I loved was lying somewhere in a hole underground, to all intents and purposes dead until dark. — Charlaine Harris

So, what, you just decided to sack out here and seduce me when I walked in the door? Home from spending the night at my boyfriend's? After having sex with him that could go in the Guinness Book of Records? — Charlaine Harris

But before they could do anything this bright light zapped them." I paused, thinking through my panic. "Actually, the zapping light was kinda like Sookie's fairy-light-thing. Do you think there's any chance I'm a fairy?" "No, Z. Focus. True Blood is fiction. — P.C. Cast

When I thought of Eric with someone else, I wanted to rip out all his beautiful blonde hair. By the roots. In clumps. — Charlaine Harris

Alcide: "It's on my right butt cheek. It's shaped like a rabbit."
Sookie: "I love bunnies! — Charlaine Harris

Because he sounded so lost-the Eric I knew had never been one to do anything other than assume others should serve him-I patted around under the covers for his hand. When I found it, I slid my own over it. His palm was turned up to meet my palm, and his fingers clasped mine. And though I would not have thought it possible to go to sleep holding hands with a vampire, that's exactly what I did. — Charlaine Harris

Don't go looking for trouble; it's already looking for you. — Charlaine Harris

Some might think you suicidal."
"Well, 'some' can stick it up their ass. — Charlaine Harris

Eric: If I had known you would be this gorgeous with your clothes off, I would have tried to do this sooner.
Sookie: You did try to do this sooner, about twenty times.
Eric: Then I have good taste. — Charlaine Harris

Remember, Sookie, nothing says more about a family than good silver and real pearls. The rest is just fluff. — Fannie Flagg

You've reached Fantasia, where the undead live again every night," "For bar hours, press one. To make a party reservation, press two. To talk to alive person or a dead vampire, press three. Or, if you were intending to leave a humorous prank message on our answering machine, know this: we will find you. — Charlaine Harris

For awhile I taped soap operas and watched them at night when I thought I might be forgetting what it was like to be human. After a while I stopped, because from the examples I saw on those shows, forgetting humanity was a good thing. — Charlaine Harris

There was enough tension in the room to send a fleet of the nervous running for their tranquilizers. — Charlaine Harris

Pam. Listen.'
'The phone is pressed to my ear. Speak.'
'Appius Livius Ocella just dropped in.'
'Fuck a zombie!'
- Sookie & Pam, Dead in the Family, Charlaine Harris — Charlaine Harris

Are you a prude?' He seemed genuinely curious.
'No!' But after a second, I said, 'But may be compared to you, yes! I like my privacy. I get to decide who sees me naked. Do you get my point?'
'Yes. Objectively speaking, you have beautiful points.'
I thought the top of my head would pop off ...
(Sookie Stackhouse & Claude, Dead in the Family) — Charlaine Harris

He picked some unwise words. Saying, "I'll enjoy killing you for my lord", is just not the way to make my acquaintance. — Charlaine Harris

Eric: 'What part do you like best?' Sookie: 'oh your butt' Eric: 'My ... Bottom?' Sookie: 'yep — Charlaine Harris

Eric was holding my hands, and I was digging my nails into him like we were doing something else. He won't mind, I though, as I realized I'd drawn blood. And sure enough, he didn't. "Let go," he advised me, and I loosened my grip on his hands. "No, not of me," he said smiling. "You can hold on to me as long as you want. — Charlaine Harris

Angelic Sookie, vision of love and beauty, I am prostrate that the wicked evil maenad violated your smooth and voluptuous body, in an attempt to deliver a message to me. -Eric — Charlaine Harris

I love you," Bill said helplessly, as if he wished those magic words would heal me. But he knew they wouldn't.
"That's what you all keep saying," I answered. "But it doesn't seem to get me any happier. — Charlaine Harris

I felt like a car that had only been operated by one driver ... a car its new prospective buyer was determined to take to the Daytona 500. — Charlaine Harris

Sookie: "Eric, when I'm back to being myself, I'm going to nail your ass for putting me in this position of being pledged to you." Eric: Darling, you can nail my ass anytime," he said charmingly, and turned to go back to his table. Pam rolled her eyes. "You two," she said. "Hey this isn't any of my doing," I said, which wasn't entirely true. But it was a good exit line, and I took advantage of it to leave the bar. — Charlaine Harris

Pam said, Sookie, I brought you something, too. I never thought I'd want to spend time with a human, but you're more tolerable than most ... — Charlaine Harris

I'll only work on TV shows that have a 'Sookie' on them! Those are the only shows that will cast me. And I've never even met a Sookie in my life. Sookie on 'Gilmore Girls' was played by Melissa McCarthy. And Sookie, played by Anna Paquin, is number one on the call sheet on 'True Blood.' Somebody should write another script with a Sookie in it. — Todd Lowe

I didn't know what to think about first: me seeing Claude naked, Claude seeing me naked, or the whole fact that we were related and naked in the same room.
(Sookie Stackhouse, Dead in the Family) — Charlaine Harris

But also because I find I really do ... " He paused, as if he were about to say something outrageous. "I find I have feelings for you."
"Oh," I said into his chest, sounding as astonished as Eric had( ... )"Eric," I said, after a long pause, "I almost hate to say this, but I have feelings for you, too. — Charlaine Harris

I want to be first. I know that's selfish, and maybe unattainable, and maybe shallow. But I just want to come first with someone. If that's wrong of me, so be it. I'll be wrong. But that's the way I feel. (Sookie Stackhouse) — Charlaine Harris

And since I'm going to be in the neighborhood, you thought I might do as an escort? To an orgy? — Charlaine Harris

We want to climb in with you,' Dermot said. 'We'll all sleep better.'
That seemed incredibly weird and creepy to me - or maybe I only thought it should have. I was simply too tired to argue. I climbed in the bed. Claude got in on one side of me, Dermot on the other. Just when I was thinking, I would never be able to sleep, that this situation was too odd and too wrong, I felt a kind of blissful relaxation roll through my body, a kind of unfamiliar comfort. I was with family. I was with blood.
And I slept. — Charlaine Harris

Come on, I said, taking his hand. Clutching the afghan with the other hand, he trailed down the hall after me, a snow white giant in tiny red underwear. — Charlaine Harris

The sweetest part of being a couple was sharing your life with someone else. — Charlaine Harris

But there was something in the air, a watchfulness laced with a charge of malice. The eyes observing us were invisible, but were observing us, nonetheless. — Charlaine Harris

you have to play it out sometimes. — Charlaine Harris

There was nothing civilized about sex with Eric. — Charlaine Harris

We could go back," he said. In the dome light of the car, his face looked hard as stone. "We could go back to your house. I can stay with you always. We can know each other's bodies in every way, night after night. I could love you." His nostrils flared, and he looked suddenly proud. "I could work. You would not be poor. I would help you."
"Sounds like a marriage," I said, trying to lighten the atmosphere. But my voice was too shaky.
"Yes," he said. — Charlaine Harris

Though I was having a blissful moment of being happy and content, I had one of those stray ideas you get at odd moments. I thought,How nice it would be if Eric were here with me in the car. He'd look so good with the wind blowing his hair, and he'd enjoy the moment . Well, yeah, before he burned to a crisp.
But I realized I'd thought of Eric because it was the kind of day you wanted to share with the person you cared about, the person whose company you enjoyed the most. And that would be Eric as he'd been while he was cursed by a witch: the Eric who hadn't been hardened by centuries of vampire politics, the Eric who had no contempt for humans and their affairs, the Eric who was not in charge of many financial enterprises and responsible for the lives and incomes of quite a few humans and vampires. In other words, Eric as he would never be again. — Charlaine Harris

I have a big hole in my heart," I said. "But it'll close over."
I don't want to sound all Dr. Phil," she said. "But don't let the scab seal the pain in, okay?"
That's good advice," I said. "I hope I can manage it. — Charlaine Harris

I realized that I was really tired of people popping on and off of my property like it was a train station on the supernatural railroad. — Charlaine Harris

Hey, our hair's the same color," I said, eying us side by side in the mirror.
"Sure is, girlfriend." Eric grinned at me. — Charlaine Harris

If this was The Lord of the Rings and I had a smart British voice like Cate Blanchett, I could tell you the background of the events of that fall in a really suspenseful way. And you'd be straining to hear the rest. — Charlaine Harris

I don't think any woman minds knowing she looks good, as long as the admiration isn't expressed in an offensive way and doesn't come from a disgusting source. — Charlaine Harris

(Sookie's Thoughts on Debbie Pelt) she had been cruel to Alcide, insulted me grievously, burned a hole in my favorite wrap and - oh - tried to kill me by proxy. Also, she had stupid hair. — Charlaine Harris

We could go back to your house. I can stay with you always. We can know each others bodies in every way, night after night. I could love you. I could work, you would not be poor. I would help you. — Charlaine Harris

You can hold on to me for as long as you want. Let go of the pain, Sookie.
- Eric, Club dead. — Charlaine Harris

[Eric] 'So you want me to go to a human orgy, where I will not be welcome, and you want us to leave before I get to enjoy myself?'

[Sookie] 'Yes,' I said, almost squeaking in my anxiety. In for a penny, in for a pound. 'And... do you think you could pretend to be gay? — Charlaine Harris