Simoleons Quotes & Sayings

I've been barbecued, stewed, screwed, tattooed, and fried by people claiming to be my friends. The human race has gone backward, not forward, since the days we were apes swinging through the trees. — W.C. Fields

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. — Edith Sitwell

No. You know what really bugs me about my videos? When they can't figure out what to do, they just have me change clothes five times. — Liz Phair

God has made all men to be happy. — Epictetus

The idea that a book can advise a woman how to capture a man is touchingly naive. Books advising men how to capture a woman are far less common, perhaps because few men are willing to admit to such a difficulty. For both sexes, I recommend a good novel, offering scenarios you might learn from, if only because they reflect a lot of doubt. — Roger Ebert