Shifter Humor Quotes & Sayings

This first time , my Sprite friend went for help, then Aiden went all shifter Hulk version and Loki'd the feral's ass. Whap, whap — Alanea Alder

To produce the kind of landscape effects Olmsted strived to create required not months but years, even decades. "I have all my life been considering distant effects and always sacrificing immediate success and applause to that of the future," he wrote. "In laying out Central Park we determined to think of no result to be realized in less than forty years. — Erik Larson

Brett will need some clothes if someone can drop some by."
"All we need is a bear rug," Meghan said. — Terry Spear

Zorro pulled her into his arms and crushed her against his body, kissing her soundly on the mouth.
"My, what a big sword you have, sir," she said, sweeping her hand over his sheathed sword.
"I'm fully armed," he said, "with that and more. — Terry Spear

Jason is explaining the ins and outs of being a bird shifter to Merry.
She says:
"Sheesh. Okay, I think I only have one more question."
"Shoot. No, don't shoot, but ask away."
"If someday I get pregnant, will I lay eggs or have babies?"
He burst out laughing and didn't stop until she hit him. — Ashlyn Chase

Live by the three 'F' rule: If they don't fuck you, feed you or finance you, they don't matter. - Maya Josephs, Prima of the Ridgeville Pride — Celia Kyle

What are you asking God for?" I joked. "A million dollars? Two million?" "I'm not asking Him for anything," he said. "I'm thanking Him for good food and wine, good health and famiglia. — Wally Lamb

Will I have to use a litter box?
Emma to Max after he just explained she'll be turning into a puma shifter
The Wallflower (Halle Pumas Book 1) — Dana Marie Bell

Marriage, if it is to survive, must be treated as the beginning, not as the happy ending. — Federico Fellini

He's a he. I mean he's a guy. He's your mate. Oh my God you're gay!" Aleks exclaimed. Liam slapped himself on the forehead. — Alanea Alder

. In gym, she would purposely get on the opposite team of me and since we were still doing dodge ball; she would try to hit me. This brings us to one of the only things I understood from my brother and dad when they were explaining stuff to me: I now had quicker reflexes thanks to the awakened shifter gene. She couldn't hit me even if the ball got launched by a canon.
Well, maybe not a canon, but something that would launch it pretty fast. — Sara Massa

New ideas in technology are literally a dime-a-dozen, or cheaper than that. — Dean Kamen

Go forth and mutilate fish. — Janice Hardy

Aleks opened his mouth to reassure his friend when he heard something that chilled him to the bone.

"Aleksander Aaron Arkadion! What in the hell is wrong with you! Why are you dragging that mangled corpse through town? You traumatized an entire first-grade class on a field trip to the town center," Ma said, striding up to them pointing down to the body that Aleks still had a hold of.

He looked down at the ankle he was holding.

"Fuck my life." Aleks looked behind his ma at the trail of blood heading back to the ice cream parlor.

Liam laughed, his arms wrapped around his waist holding his sides. — Alanea Alder

Do you believe in ghosts? — Terry Spear

A karaoke bar?" Mitch glared at him. "You dragged us to a karaoke bar?"
"She didn't tell me it was karaoke."
"You know it's bad enough having to listen to you guys howl all the time. But this ... this may be asking too much. Dogs. Singing." Mitch turned to the bar and lashed Smitty with another glare. "And no goddamn liquor. You know, as per shifter law, I could legally kill you. — Shelly Laurenston

I couldn't compete with Honesty,

With her dark blonde hair streaked with auburn,
With her captivating blue eyes,
With her legs that stretched into forever.
She had the brains,
The body,
The perfect resume for girlfriend.

And me?
I had the perfect resume for
Best friend.
All the boys said so. — Elana Johnson

Fate's got a fucking sick sense of humor. Fate is a shape-shifter. It's the kindest and most generous entity imaginable, laying out more goodness than a person deserves, and then it shrinks and curls and forms into something grotesque. You think its one thing, but then its another. — Deb Caletti

Meditation Take the world, but give me Jesus, Sweetest comfort of my soul; With my Savior watching o'er me, I can sing though billows roll. Take the world, but give me Jesus, Let me view his constant smile; Then throughout my pilgrim journey Light will cheer me all the while. Take the world, but give me Jesus, All its joys are but a name; But his love abideth ever, Through eternal years the same. Take the world, but give me Jesus. In his cross my trust shall be, Till, with clearer, brighter vision, Face to face my Lord I see. Refrain Oh, the height and depth of mercy! Oh, the length and breadth of love! Oh, the fullness of redemption, Pledge of endless life above! "TAKE THE WORLD, BUT GIVE ME JESUS," FANNY CROSBY (1879) — John Dunlop

She bared her teeth at me. "Screw you, shifter!"
"Ah, is our honeymoon period over so quickly? You wanted to jump my bones just a second ago. — Cori Moore

You are such a wolf."
"When it comes to you? Absolutely. — Terry Spear

You cannot all abandon your possessions, but at least you can change your attitude about them. All getting separates you from others; all giving unites to others. — Francis Of Assisi

Unless the she-wolf agrees, there's always a chance of rejection. — Terry Spear

For the record," I do not desire your body. Not that you're hideous or anything, far from it. Even with those scars, your chest is really nice, and I like your legs because they aren't scrawny, and you have nice shoulders and naughty bits, but I've never been one to put physical attributes ahead of more important things."
"Such as?" He had his hands on his hips when he asked the question, which just made me want to giggle again.
"Intelligence, a sense of humor, and oh yes, not being a mythical creature." I swallowed another giggle. "Not that it wasn't a cool form, but still. I like my men without the sort of baggage that must go with being a shape-shifter."
"Is that so?" One eyebrow lifted.
"Yes."
"Then you will not like this." He pulled me against him, his mouth moving into place on mine, his breath hotter than I could have imagined. And then he kissed the very wits right out of my brain. — Katie MacAlister

Nix to Regin: What about that nice leopard-shifter pack that wanted to date you? The benefits of a variety pack of males cannot be overstated. — Kresley Cole

But to be a parent is to live in the past-present-future all at once. It is to hug your children and be intensely aware of how much smaller they felt last year ... even as you wonder how much bigger they will feel the next. It is to be a time-shifter, to marvel at the budding of their intellect, their verbal dexterity, their sense of humor ... at the same time rewinding and fast-forwarding ... to when they were younger, to when they'll be older. It is to experience longing for the here and now, which I know sounds flaky - sort of like complaining about being homesick when you're already home - but can happen, trust me, when you live in multiple time zones all at once. — Youngme Moon