Sex Advice Quotes & Sayings

For men, sex is not equal commitment — Linda Alfiori

It is no better if your son rapes a woman than when your daughter gets raped. It is equally painful, may be more.

~ Rudransh Kashyap — Kirtida Gautam

Sex makes you stupid — Donna Barnes

You can't make a woman love you. Not even with duct tape. — J. Richard Singleton

Never depend on a single income. Make Investments to create a second source." - Warren Buffet — Archie Lee

My parents were so old-fashioned in their attitude to sex that I would rather get in trouble with the police or at school because at least I would be punished less. — Clive Worth

Yet, if I were to adhere to my mom's advice, I would have had to drop out of school years ago (since a lot of folks in our inequitable education system refuse to love us), quit engaging public health offices (because I walked in as a human in need of medical services and walked out as a patient whose subjective world was mad invisible by research lingo: "MSM," otherwise known as "men who have sex with men'), sleep in my bed all damn day (knowing it is more likely that I would be stopped by police when walking to the store in Camden or Bed-Stuy while rocking a fitted cap and carrying books than my white male neighbors would be while walking around in ski masks in the middle of summer and dropping a dime bag on the ground in front of a walking police and his dog)... — Kiese Laymon

Good sex is about knowing each other's deepest and kinkiest desires. — Abhijit Naskar

There is no such thing as "vaginal orgasm" vs. "clitoral orgasm". The entire ring of tissues that surrounds the vaginal opening is connected to the clitoris by nerves and blood vessels. Ultimately all these tissues together are responsible for the female orgasm. This entire erogenous zone is often referred to as the "ring of fire". — Abhijit Naskar

The Girlfriend 911 Cheat Sheet:
1) Change your behavior, and you'll change his.
2) Create a high standard for yourself.
3) Create a boundary for yourself and for him.
4) Allow him to take the lead every step of the way. It's a chess game. He makes his move, then you make yours.
5) Don't contact him unless he contacts you first. Don't play games or lead him on if you're not interested. Always be honest and up-front with your intentions.
6) Pay close attention to signs and red flags. Don't ignore them. When you see one, figure out what it means and act accordingly.
7) If you want a long-term relationship, postpone sleeping with him. Wait until a good amount of time has gone by, both of you are on the same page, and you both want to be in a committed relationship. If there's any doubt on his part, don't sleep with him. If he tells you he doesn't want to be in a relationship, take him at his word and move on. — Jacquee Kahn

In marriage never withhold sex because for men sex is the biggest love expression that a woman can give in a committed relationship. — Linda Alfiori

You can't run away from your fears. Isn't that what you always tell your readers?"
I was an advice columnist for Vibe, a magazine about relationships and sex and urban culture. My column, called "Ask Miss Independent," had started at a student-run publication, and I had quickly developed a following. Upon graduating, I'd taken Miss Independent to Vibe, and they offered me a weekly feature. Most of my advice was posted publicly, but I also sent private paid-for replies to those who requested it. To supplement my income, I also did occasional freelancing for women's magazines.
"I'm not running away from my fears," I told Dane. "I'm running away from my relatives."
Ring.
"Just pick it up, Ella. You always tell people to face their problems."
"Yes, but I prefer to ignore mine and let them fester. — Lisa Kleypas

Let's start with this statistic: You are delicious. Be brave, my sweet. I know you can get lonely. I know you can crave companionship and sex and love so badly that it physically hurts. But I truly believe that the only way you can find out that there's something better out there is to first believe there's something better out there. What other choice is there? — Greg Behrendt

Filled with great advice, practical support, and steamy, imaginative suggestions for how to have an exciting, challenging, satisfying sex life. — Karen X. Tulchinsky

The problem, of course, is that at any given historical moment, prevailing views about the right changes to make in how we care for our bodies can be bullying and shaming. There is a lot of widespread guilt about diet, exercise, sex, and treatments. How insistent all the advice is! Have sex a lot, don't have any sex; eat heartily, eat with restraint; hold your body in stillness, move it and have it moved; bind your ample body tightly, wear soft clothes but have no fat. Not only are the various instructions different; they are directly at odds with each other. Yet, despite our historical track record on these matters, we are today generally confident that we know best- that science and other experts have now got it right, after a long history of nonsense. — Jennifer Michael Hecht

Holding hands in love is underrated, while sex is overrated. Don't you think so? — Kiran Joshi

Sweetie," Dino said, coming over to put his arm around her shoulder. He tipped her head up and looked into her eyes with great empathy. "You can't fuck a statue. At least not at that angle. You'd at least have to tip it onto its back first, and as a conservator, I can't recommend it. — Rosanna Leo

It was during my study in Israel that I came to the realization that most of what I had learned in my courses in religion in the United States was outdated or in error. In order to understand what the biblical position is on any subject and, particularly on the subject of sex, one has to do it from a Hebrew perspective. — Roy B. Blizzard

It's disconcerting to realize how little you have to say to someone who once occupied such a prominent place in your bed. — Sue Grafton

Thanks to my mother, I was raised to have a morbid imagination. When I was a child, she often talked about death as warning, as an unavoidable matter of fact. Little Debbie's mom down the block might say, 'Honey, look both ways before crossing the street.' My mother's version: 'You don't look, you get smash flat like sand dab.' (Sand dabs were the cheap fish we bought live in the market, distinguished in my mind by their two eyes affixed on one side of their woebegone cartoon faces.)
The warnings grew worse, depending on the danger at hand. Sex education, for example, consisted of the following advice: 'Don't ever let boy kiss you. You do, you can't stop. Then you have baby. You put baby in garbage can. Police find you, put you in jail, then you life over, better just kill youself. — Amy Tan

I don't intend to use beer as a crutch and drink until I pass out. So advice, keep an eye on that so you can get in there and get yourself drunk sex before it turns unpretty and drunk sex ends with me puking and / or passing out during the act. — Kristen Ashley

When I met a truly beautiful girl, I would tell her that if she spent the night with me, I would write a novel or a story about her. This usually worked; and if her name was to be in the title of the story, it almost always worked. Then, later, when we'd passed a night of delicious love-making together, after she'd gone and I'd felt that feeling of happiness mixed with sorrow, I sometimes would write a book or story about her. Sometimes her character, her way about herself, her love-making, it sometimes marked me so heavily that I couldn't go on in life and be happy unless I wrote a book or a story about that woman, the happy and sad memory of that woman. That was the only way to keep her, and to say goodbye to her without her ever leaving. — Roman Payne

I remember Queen Victoria's advice to her daughter. Close your eyes and think of England. — Margaret Atwood

Lack of communication can drive a spike between two people wider than any physical distance. — Mark W. Boyer

I think these pipe-smokers oughta just move to the next level and go ahead and suck a dick. There's nothing wrong with suckin' dicks. Men do it, women do it; can't be all bad if everybody's doin' it. I say, Drop the pipe, and go to the dick! That's my advice. I'm here to help. — George Carlin

What is your advice to young writers?"
"Drink, fuck and smoke plenty of cigarettes. — Charles Bukowski

I need dating advice. Fast...Julian, how did you meet your wife?"

Julian shrugged. "My brother the sex god cursed me into a book for two thousand years. Grace got drunk on her birthday and summoned me out of it."

Vane rolled his eyes. "That's useless. Kyrian? What about you?"

"I woke up handcuffed to Amanda."

Vane could work with that. "So I need to get a set of handcuffs? — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I'd offer you advice, but I've never been married." "Neither has Garrett," I said, stating the truth. "He's a slut." Cookie giggled. "I love it when you call men sluts." "Right?" I said, giggling back. "It's much funnier than the alternative." It was odd how I despised that word when talking about women, but when talking about men, all bets were off. Maybe because of the centuries-old double standard where a woman who enjoyed sex was a slut, whereas a man who enjoyed sex was a stud. That one never sat well with me. — Darynda Jones

Bud's relationship with the female sex was governed by a gallimaufry of primal impulses, dim suppositions, deranged theories, overheard scraps of conversation, half-remembered pieces of bad advice, and fragments of no-doubt exaggerated anecdotes that amounted to rank superstition. — Neal Stephenson

Love is a renewable resource — Blanshard & Blanshard

I'm not an advocate of promiscuity; but then I'm also not an advocate of being virginal. It's not like I put virginity or celibacy on a pedestal, and as long as I don't get your promiscuity rubbed into my face - I don't care about it! What I do care about is the ability to recognize the sanctity of a union of two souls - you just can't say your soul isn't being united with others' when you have sex with them. So I think you'd better own up to what you're doing - no matter how frequently or infrequently or with how many different people you do it. I mean, make good choices! You are, after all, entwining your soul with another's. — C. JoyBell C.

Talk openly about important issues like money, sex, and religion. They can affect your life and happiness a great deal. Especially when it comes to cults. — Jesse Petersen

Alright, listen up. I'm supposed to give you some fatherly and wise advice at this time in your life. Listen up, if you're wondering if a boy's thinking about you, he's not. He's thinking about sex, or he's hungry: those are the only two options. — Eric Taylor

Sex is the dessert in a relationship, not the appetizer — Linda Alfiori

Leonora is the grownups' version of Cinderella. She doesn't take crap from any ugly stepsisters. She doesn't sit indoors waiting to be rescued by prince charming. Oh, no, she rescues prince charming, Florestan, who's locked up in a dungeon by his archenemy, Pizarro. Cinderella was fun when we were little girls, played with dolls and believed in passive fairytales. Now that we're grown women who play with toys, it's only fit to believe in active fairytales. — Luella Christie

Keep Your Pants On
Some people believe the myth that if you do NOT have sex by the third date the relationship is going nowhere. What a joke!!! Why would you have sex with a complete stranger? This person could be married, a psycho, or have an interesting disease that could be spread to you. Get to know the person for who they are, no matter how great their body is. Why risk having sex before discovering you really do not like them? Think before you get naked! — Pamela Cummins

Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't! — George Bernard Shaw

Sex is an open secret parents try to hide to their children — Bangambiki Habyarimana

If you can't be happy and content by yourself then you shouldn't be in a relationship. — Evan Sutter

Let me give you some advice here: People who want to have the sex talk with you will act the same way as people who want to murder you. First they get you in their car, so they're in control and you can't escape. Then they drive you someplace in the middle of nowhere. — Flynn Meaney

...sex is a commitment. You are gifting another human being with access to the deepest part of yourself; you are sharing with them a bit of your soul. You are forging a connection that can never be undone--no matter how much you may want to undo it after the fact. — Zofie Kae

Sex becomes less and less pleasurable in a relationship over time. Your brain gets habituated to the sensual stimulation from your specific partner as you are exposed to it repeatedly. It doesn't mean that the love is gone from the relationship. Love still exists beyond the barriers of time, in the form of attachment, which becomes independent of sexual intimacy after the euphoric stage of mad love. — Abhijit Naskar

The only thing more difficult than persuading someone else to start having sex with you is persuading yourself to stop. — Jacob M. Appel

I think the last thing you should do to someone willing to put your penis in their mouth is give them criticism. — S.A. Tawks

Be generous, kind and compassionate. These are true characteristics of successful people. — Archie Lee

When i dated someone, my goal is to marry her, i date to get married one day, i don't date a girl just to have sex and leave her, why wasting your time if the goal is not to get married? — Werley Nortreus

Creepy is being attached to an outcome. If you approach someone with the goal of sex, and hten find thins not going in that direction, you may try to steer things back to sex. This is creepy. — Allison Moon

All the baby books written by women who had the most perfect birth experience in the world said you should talk to your child in the womb. That was about the only piece of advice I took from those things. Every day I told him if he ruined my vagina I would video tape his birth and show all his future girlfriends what happened to your who-ha when you had sex, ensuring that he will never, ever get laid. — Tara Sivec

Do you need sex advice? Here's a tip. Sometimes a lady likes to leave her blazer on. — LIZ

The journey home was made short by Ronan's tales of research on love. He confessed to Katie he was not good at expressing his inner feelings. He adopted the Socratic Method and asked all his friends and family for advice. They proved no help so he enlisted the help of Lovely Lucy Looney, the local librarian. He went and researched love, sex and flirting. He spoke of Lucy's shock on his many visits to the library and his mortification but Katie's love was worth all embarrassment. She was touched by his Herculean efforts and knew he was her soul mate — Annette J. Dunlea

You know how people are always saying your parents are always right? "Follow your parents' advice; they know what's good for you." And you know how no one ever listens to this advice, because even if it's true it's so annoying and condescending that it just make you want to go, like, develop a meth addiction and have unprotected sex with eighty seven thousand anonymous partners? — John Green

My mum told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I'd ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying "Can I have a new bike?". He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike. — Jimmy Carr

Maybe life involves the pairing of unsuitable people, those who wait and those who keep others waiting, and the key to happiness is finding the one person with whom you share the same internal chronometer. — Jacob M. Appel

I used to dream of true love; now I'm open to false, but convincing ... — Jacob M. Appel

There are two more turds, smaller ones, and when he has eaten these, residual shit to lick out of her anus. He prays that she'll let him drop the cape over himself, to be allowed, in the silk-lined darkness, to stay a while longer with his submissive tongue straining upward into her asshole. But she moves away. The fur evaporates from his hands. She orders him to masturbate for her. She has watched Captain Blicero with Gottfried, and has learned the proper style. — Thomas Pynchon

Prom night can be a special night, if you let it be. I know you think it's for losers and something that popular kids do because they are boring people with porcelain hearts who don't know what it means to be lonely. But you're wrong. Prom is a chance for everyone to try oral sex. Go for it. — Eugene Mirman

If there's one thing I know about women, it's that they have vaginas. — J. Richard Singleton

It's probably not easy for a woman to understand what it's like to be a man. Imagine you're starving, and someone puts a huge buffet in front of you. There's delicious, mouth-watering food all around you, and it's really really hard not to eat it all. That's what it's like to be a man around attractive women. The urge to want to hump everything that moves is part of a man's natural programming. It's a deep-seated hunger. To suppress that hunger takes civilization and a lot of willpower. — Oliver Markus

[Professor] Frank recalled my idle remark some years ago: 'Never pass up the opportunity to have sex or appear on television.' Advice I would never give today in the age of AIDS and its television equivalent Fox News. — Gore Vidal

It's been six months, Nancy.'
'What's your hurry? It took me a year to get used to living with Carl. I mean, what do men do anyway? They work, eat, drink, and play games. Sex for them is in the sports and recreation category. You can't live with a man and not be lonely.'
'You think so?'
'Absolutely. Besides, once you have kids, it all changes anyway. Everything seems to make sense then. — Andre Dubus III