Schulz Quotes & Sayings

Error is the ultimate inside job. Yes, the world can be profoundly confusing; and yes, other people can mislead or deceive you. In the end, though, nobody but you can choose to believe your own beliefs. That's part of why recognizing our errors is such a strange experience: accustomed to disagreeing with other people, we suddenly find ourselves at odds with *ourselves*. — Kathryn Schulz

Doubt is a skill. credulity ,by contrast, appears to be something very like an instinct — Kathryn Schulz

I think this is irresponsible preaching and very dangerous, and especially when it is slanted toward children, I think it's totally irresponsible, because I see nothing biblical that points up to our being in the last days, and I just think it's an outrageous thing to do, and a lot of people are making a living - they've been making a living for 2,000 years - preaching that we're in the last days. — Charles M. Schulz

Rats! Sometimes it's very difficult being a dog ... Especially when it's raining. You're looking forward to a great breakfast ... When it arrives, you're full of joyful anticipation ... Then you see the water rise in your dog dish ... And you watch your pancakes float downstream! — Charles M. Schulz

Hello, Sally? Let me talk to Chuck, will you?"
"I think he's lost in the woods."
"I know what you mean, but let me talk to him, will you? — Charles M. Schulz

Love is a letter on pink stationery. — Charles M. Schulz

Homicide is not a sin. It is sometimes a necessary violence on resistant and ossified forms of existence which have ceased to be amusing. In the interests of an important and fascinating experiment, it can even become meritorious. Here is the starting point of a new apologia for sadism. — Bruno Schulz

I'm torn between the desire to create and the desire to destroy. — Charles M. Schulz

People shouldn't be embarrassed just because they get caught acting a little silly. — Charles M. Schulz

Schroeder, do you think I'm beautiful?"
"I think you're the most beautiful girl the world has ever known ... "
"You hate me, don't you? — Charles M. Schulz

I gave up trying to understand people long ago. Now I let them try to understand me! — Charles M. Schulz

Even in the depths of sleep, in which he had to satisfy his need for protection and love by curling himself up into a trembling ball, he could not rid himself of the feeling of loneliness and homelessness. — Bruno Schulz

I think I've discovered the secret of life
you just hang around until you get used to it. — Charles M. Schulz

Try not to have a good time ... this is supposed to be educational. — Charles M. Schulz

I just draw what I think is funny, and I hope other people think it is funny, too. — Charles M. Schulz

I am not concerned with simply surviving. I am very concerned about improving. I start each day by examining yesterday's work and looking for areas where I can improve. I am always trying to draw the characters better, and trying to design each panel somewhat in the manner a painter would treat his canvas. — Charles M. Schulz

Empty?! You took all the cookies!"
"They were crying to get out of the jar ... Cookies get claustrophobia too, you know! — Charles M. Schulz

Dear Valentine, I love you. Whoever you are. — Charles M. Schulz

After we passed a few more houses, the street ceased to mantain any pretense of urbanity, like a man returning to his little village who, piece by piece, strips off his Sunday best, slowly changing back into a peasant as he gets closer to his home. — Bruno Schulz

That's the secret to life ... replace one worry with another. — Charles M. Schulz

No problem is so formidable that you can't walk away from it. — Charles M. Schulz

Aren't the clouds beautiful? They look like big balls of cotton ... I could just lie here all day, and watch them drift by ... If you use your imagination, you can see lots of things in the cloud formations ... What do you think you see, Linus?"
"Well, those clouds up there look like the map of the British Honduras on the Caribbean ... That cloud up there looks a little like the profile of Thomas Eakins, the famous painter and sculptor ... And that group of clouds over there gives me the impression of the stoning of Stephen ... I can see the apostle Paul standing there to one side ... "
"Uh huh ... That's very good ... What do you see in the clouds, Charlie Brown?"
"Well, I was going to say I saw a ducky and a horsie, but I changed my mind! — Charles M. Schulz

No matter what anyone says, it's much worse to be unloved than it is to be lost in the woods."
"Sometimes, I think you've been lost in the woods all your life, Charlie Brown ... — Charles M. Schulz

As a kid, I lived almost entirely inside books, and eventually the books started returning the favor. A lot of my internal world feels like an anthology, or a library. It's eclectic and disorganized, but I can browse in it, and that hugely shapes both what and how I write. — Kathryn Schulz

but he never murdered me. Not once. That's saying something, isn't it? — Heidi Schulz

This is my report on how to live ... They say the best way is just to live one day at a time ... If you try to live seven days at a time, the week will be over before you know it ... — Charles M. Schulz

I've been thinking ... Maybe you're a mockingbird ... Mockingbirds imitate the songs of other birds ... No, I've never heard of any copyright problems. — Charles M. Schulz

I fall in love with any girl who smells of library paste. — Charles M. Schulz

A watched supper dish never fills! — Charles M. Schulz

In our town there was a Gestapo officer who loved to play chess. After the occupation began, he found out that my father was the chess master of the region, and so he had him to his house every night. — Bruno Schulz

All you need is love,
But a little bit of chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. — Charles M. Schulz

It seems beyond the comprehension of people that someone can be born to draw comic strips, but I think I was. My ambition from earliest memory was to produce a daily comic strip. — Charles M. Schulz

Under the imaginary table that separates me from my readers, don't we secretly clasp each other's hands? — Bruno Schulz

Friendship isn't about who you've known the longest. It's all about the friend who comes and stands by your side in bad times. — Charles M. Schulz

The thing that I came to realize was that Schulz is the great unifier. Here's the one cartoonist that pretty much everybody can agree on. — Chip Kidd

Five hundred years from now, who'll know the difference?! — Charles M. Schulz

There is no dead matter," he taught us, "lifelessness is only a disguise behind which hide unknown forms of life. The range of these forms is infinite and their shades and nuances limitless. — Bruno Schulz

Who are you writing to, Linus?"
"This is the time of year to write to the Great Pumpkin. On Halloween Night, the Great Pumpkin rises out of his pumpkin patch and flies through the air with his bag of toys for all the children!"
"You must be crazy! When are you going to stop believing in something that isn't true?"
"When *you* stop believing in that fellow with a red suit and the white beard who goes, 'Ho, ho, ho!'"
"We're obviously separated by denominational differences. — Charles M. Schulz

May I ask a question, Lucy?"
"Go right ahead!"
"Just why do you want to draw this line all the way around the world?"
"Well, you know the old saying, Charlie Brown ... You have to draw the line someplace! — Charles M. Schulz

Our love of being right is best understood as our fear of being wrong — Kathryn Schulz

The cashier had long since left for home. By now she was probably bustling by an unmade bed that was waiting in her small room like a boat to carry her off to the black lagoons of sleep, into the complicated world of dreams. The person sitting in the box office was only a wraith, an illusory phantom looking with tired, heavily made-up eyes at the empyiness of light, fluttering her lashes thoughtlessly to disperse the golden dust of drowsiness scattered by the elctric bulbs. — Bruno Schulz

Even a committed realist will concede that there are many situations where an absolute standard of truth is unavailable. And yet, confronted with such situations, we often continue to act as if right and wrong are the relevant yardsticks. — Kathryn Schulz

Yet what is to be done with events that have no place of their own in time; events that have occurred too late, after the whole of time has been distributed, divided, and allotted; events that have been left in the cold, unregistered, hanging in the air, homeless, and errant? — Bruno Schulz

Well from now on, Linus think for yourself ... Don't take any advice from anyone! — Charles M. Schulz

Travel tips: How to avoid carsickness, seasickness and airsickness ... Be careful what you eat. And stay home. — Charles M. Schulz

The secret to speed-reading is moving your lips faster. — Charles M. Schulz

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. — Charles M. Schulz

Life has its sunshine and its rain, sir ... its days and its nights ... its peaks and its valleys ... — Charles M. Schulz

The books we read in childhood don't exist anymore; they sailed off with the wind, leaving bare skeletons behind. Whoever still has in him the memory and marrow of childhood should rewrite these books as he experienced them. — Bruno Schulz

Peppermint Patty's team is short a glove, so I'm walking over to lend them mine."
"You're kidding! Don't you think they're taking advantage of you?"
"No, I'm doing it because I want to do it."
"What are you, some kind of mystic?! — Charles M. Schulz

MAN: You said pound cake. WOMAN: I didn't say pound cake, I said crumb cake. MAN: You said pound cake. WOMAN: Don't tell me what I said. MAN: You said pound cake. WOMAN: I said crumb cake. MAN: I actually saw the crumb cake but I didn't get it because you said pound cake. WOMAN: I said crumb cake. MAN: Well, I heard pound cake. WOMAN: Then you obviously weren't listening. Crumb cake doesn't even sound like pound cake. MAN: Well, maybe you accidentally said pound cake. Woman: I said crumb cake. - overheard in Grand Central Station, November 13, 2008 — Kathryn Schulz

If, forgetting the respect due to the Creator, I were to attempt a criticism of creation, I would say 'Less matter, more form! — Bruno Schulz

LINUS: Where are you going for Thanksgiving, Charlie Brown?
CHARLIE: My father, my mother, Sally, and I are all going to my grandmothers for dinner.
SALLY: Do you want to come too, Linus? We can hold hands under the table.
LINUS: BLECH! — Charles M. Schulz

Freud, as I've already noted, believed that the false worlds of our dreams reveal deep and hidden truths about ourselves. — Kathryn Schulz

Reliance on other people's knowledge ... buys us all a lot of time. It also buys us, in essence, many billions of prosthetic brains. — Kathryn Schulz

Shermy: Men are better than women!
Patty: They are not!!
Shermy: Washington was a man! Jefferson was a man! Lincoln was a man!
Patty: Your mother is a woman!!
Shermy: You got me! — Charles M. Schulz

Imagine a German as president of the European Commission. If he or she goes to some particular country and says do this or that, it won't be very well received. The president quickly ends up being the evil German. But if the president is elected by and controlled by 700 representatives from all EU countries, that legitimizes him or her in a very different way. — Martin Schulz

Linus: What's wrong, Charlie Brown?
Charlie Brown: I just got terrible news. The teacher says we're going on a field trip to an art museum; and I have to get an A on my report or I'll fail the whole course. Why do we have to have all this pressure about grades, Linus?
Linus: Well, I think that the purpose of going to school is to get good grades so then you can go on to high school; and the purpose is to study hard so you can get good grades so you can go to college; and the purpose of going to college is so you can get good grades so you can go on to graduate school; and the purpose of that is to work hard and get good grades so we can get a job and be successful so that we can get married and have kids so we can send them to grammar school to get good grades so they can go to high school to get good grades so they can go to college and work hard ...
Charlie Brown: Good grief! — Charles M. Schulz

There you see how absurd the reactions of the so-called markets are. For a long time, Italy was run by one of the most unprofessional politicians anywhere. But there wasn't much pressure in terms of speculation. Now, in Mario Monti, Italy has the kind of leader you usually only get in Hollywood movies, a distinguished professor who won't even accept a cook at his residence, the Palazzo Chigi. Instead Monti's wife cooks their pasta herself - and this is the man the markets don't trust. — Martin Schulz

Those who find no humor in faith are probably those who find the church a refuge for their own black way of looking at life, although I think many of us find the church a refuge for a lot of our personality faults. Those of us, for example, who never learned to dance feel that the church is an ideal place for us if we can find a church that doesn't believe in dancing. Then we can get away with never having learned how to dance. You can carry this in all sorts of directions and see that the church is a refuge for what is really a 'flaw' in your own makeup. — Charles M. Schulz

A cartoonist is someone who has to draw the same thing day after day without repeating himself. — Charles M. Schulz

Thirty-three percent of all of our regrets pertain to decisions we made about education. — Kathryn Schulz

Jocelyn did not want to always remain the same. Where was the adventure in that? — Heidi Schulz

Europe was founded as a community bound together by solidarity. — Martin Schulz

Now Europe are experiencing a wave of eroding solidarity, first of certain societies and then entire governments. At the same time, we have two giant new challenges to meet: the migration movement and terror. And then Great Britain is thinking about leaving the EU. That should suffice as a description. — Martin Schulz

There are two ways to look at my publishing career. One is that I'm a novelist churning out books, who is eight into a series; the other way is that I'm a cartoonist, just starting out. Most cartoonists have long careers: Charles Schulz drew Peanuts for 50 years. — Jeff Kinney

Lucy: Our teacher wants us to write an essay on praying. Charlie Brown: Praying is important when you wake up at two o'clock in the morning feeling sick from eating something dumb the day before. Lucy: I'll just say we were out of town and I didn't have time to write anything. — Charles M. Schulz

Humor is proof that everything is going to be all right with God nevertheless. — Charles M. Schulz

Hello? Oh, nothing ... Just sort of hanging around ... My brother? He's right here ... He's reading ... He's always reading ... He has no life of his own, and he's a very boring person so he reads a lot ... What's he reading? I don't know ... She wants to know what you're reading ... "
"How to survive living in the same family with an annoying sister."
"Ivanhoe. — Charles M. Schulz

Often, our beliefs about what is factually right and our beliefs about what is morally right are entirely inextricable. — Kathryn Schulz

Charlie Brown says that we're put here on earth to make others happy."
"Is that why we're here? I guess I'd better start doing a better job ... I'd hate to be shipped back! — Charles M. Schulz

As we manipulate everyday words, we forget that they are fragments of ancient and eternal stories, that we are building our houses with broken pieces of sculptures and ruined statues of gods as the barbarians did. — Bruno Schulz

Man was entering under false pretenses the sphere of incredible facilities, acquired too cheaply, below cost price, almost for nothing, and the disproportion between outlay and gain, the obvious fraud on nature, the excessive payment for a trick of genius, had to be offset by self-parody. — Bruno Schulz

Would I sacrifice a friendship to take a step forward in my political career? Thus far in my political career, I have been spared from having to make such a decision, thank God. And I can't imagine what it must be like. — Martin Schulz

Can you understand,' asked my father, 'the deep meaning of that weakness, that passion for colored tissue, for papier-mache, for distemper, for oakum and sawdust? This is,' he continued with a pained smile, 'the proof of our love for matter as such, for its fluffiness or porosity, for its unique mystical consistency. Demiurge, that great master and artist, made matter invisible, made it disappear under the surface of life. We, on the contrary, love its creaking, its resistance, its clumsiness. We like to see behind each gesture, behind each move, its inertia, its heavy effort, its bearlike awkwardness. — Bruno Schulz

You can't eat compliments. — Charles M. Schulz

You can't write a term paper before breakfast. — Charles M. Schulz

We need economic growth in Europe and we need to find a solution for the excessive interest rates that are making it difficult for many countries to get their own debt under control. — Martin Schulz

I'm dying and all I hear are insults! — Charles M. Schulz

Error ... is less an intellectual problem than an existential one - a crisis not in what we know, but in who we are. We hear something of that identity crisis in the questions we ask ourselves in the aftemath of error: What was I thinking? How could I have done that? — Kathryn Schulz

My mother's brother was killed while clearing mines in 1945. Those are things that mark your childhood and they help explain why we are so devoted to European unity. — Martin Schulz

You're a good man, Charlie Brown. — Charles M. Schulz

That has to be the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to me in my whole life. — Charles M. Schulz

Cartooning is preaching. And I think we have a right to do some preaching. I hate shallow humor. I hate shallow religious humor, I hate shallow sports humor, I hate shallowness of any kind. — Charles M. Schulz

Sometimes I ask myself questions... Sometimes I ask myself, is this your real life or is this just a pilot film? Is my life a thirty-nine week series or is it a special?"
"Whatever it is, your ratings are down... Five cents, please! — Charles M. Schulz

I'm depressed! I'm completely depressed! I am firmly convinced that there is no one in this world who really likes me!"
"So what else is new? — Charles M. Schulz

I come from a long line of generations! — Charles M. Schulz

Oh yes, I'm at my happiest when I have a good idea and I'm drawing it well, and it comes out well and somebody laughs at it. — Charles M. Schulz

Sometimes I lie awake ay night, and I wonder, "is life like golf or is it more like baseball?" Then a voice comes to me out of the dark that says, "try shuffleboard. — Charles M. Schulz

Nobody remembers who came in second. — Charles M. Schulz

Well, I can understand how you feel. You worked hard, studying for the spelling bee, and I suppose you feel you let everyone down, and you made a fool of yourself and everything. But did you notice something, Charlie Brown?"
"What's that?"
"The world didn't come to an end. — Charles M. Schulz

Christmas is a box of tree ornaments that have become part of the family. — Charles M. Schulz

Never, ever, ever give up. — Charles M. Schulz

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and wonder if my life would be different if I had to do it over ... Then a voice comes to me out of the dark that says, boy, there's an original thought! — Charles M. Schulz

Soon Hansel and Gretel came to a little cottage. When they got quite near, they saw that the little house was made of bread and roofed with cake. The windows were transparent sugar."
"There must not have been a very strict building code ... — Charles M. Schulz

There is no heavier burden than an unfulfilled potential. — Charles M. Schulz

There open up, deep inside a city, reflected streets, streets which are double, make-believe streets. One's imagination, bewitched and misled, creates illusory maps of the apparently familiar districts, maps in which the streets have their proper places and usual names but are provided with new and fictitious configurations by the inexhaustible inventiveness of the night. — Bruno Schulz

Here's Joe Cool hanging around the student union — Charles M. Schulz

Though her husband often went on business trips, she hated to be left alone.
"I've solved your problem," he said. "I've bought you a St. Bernard. Its name is Great Reluctance. Now, when I go away, you shall know that I am leaving you with Great Reluctance!"
She hit him with a waffle iron. — Charles M. Schulz

What's the sense in having an eclipse if you can't look at it? Somebody in production sure slipped up this time! — Charles M. Schulz