Satire Quotes Quotes & Sayings

I believe that before anybody makes the journey to the other side, we have to know on a soul level that we are leaving, whether it's an accident or illness, and we prepare ourselves to a certain degree that we won't be there in the future. — John Edward

Tribal Chief 1: The will of the people is what is best. That is what democracy means

Tribal Chief 2: But if the people don't know what they are talking about, how can that be the best? — Leonard Wibberley

They did it quite a lot after that first encounter" ... when Jill remembers first meeting the dashing Baron. — Lisa McKnight

There are worse things than eating the dead, my dear fellow. Far worse things. There is, for instance, making a huge profit out of their funeral, which is the normal custom in the civilized world. — Leonard Wibberley

By the standards of a tourist strolling past looking for a quick lunch, the place was a dive. The sign on the window was small and easy to miss, and the antique feel of the place wasn't the prepackaged, old-shit-on-the-wall nostalgia that came with so many chain restaurants. The cafe was just old, and everything about it said old. But Jon liked it that way, if only because it kept the tourists away and spared him from hearing imported ignorance when there was plenty of local ignorance to go around. — Scott B. Pruden

I have been told the best things in life are free ~ I found them very expensive. — E.A. Bucchianeri

Libations are for the gods. Cocktails are for mere mortals. — Jonathan Kieran

he pays his respect
by smiling at you
when others are looking
how he calls you a bitch
right after is truly amazing — Ymatruz

An avalanche is just a snowflake that got pissed off. — Andi James Chamberlain

You know, you're rather amusingly wrong. — Terry Pratchett

The wise man lives as long as he ought, not so long as he can. — Michel De Montaigne

When it comes to things such as sugar and rice, most people believe that brown is superior to white. But when it comes to human beings, they believe that the opposite is true. — Mokokoma Mokhonoana

F***ing triffids. — Scott B. Pruden

Being in love is the best feeling on the planet. I really believe that love makes the world go round. — Sonam Kapoor

You cannot really shame a man who sincerely does not care what others think of him. — Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Life's a crapshoot, Sam. At least you filled the cheap seats. — Robert Bruce Cormack

Messy" is a word we use to explain a conflict with an expectation we had. Eliminate the expectation, and you eliminate the "messy". — Steve Maraboli

The walking tour guides one through the city's various landmarks, reciting bits of information the listener might find enlightening. I learned, for example, that in the late 1500s my little neighborhood square was a popular spot for burning people alive. Now lined with a row of small shops, the tradition continues, though in a figurative rather than literal sense. — David Sedaris

The ultimate downfall of the computerized holographic receptionist was that there was no amount of flattery, flirtation or chocolate that could convince one to lie for you. — Scott B. Pruden

to leaders - people are emotional and you can take them for a ride as long as they continue to be gullible — Anno Nomius

Almost as a rule, political dissidents were writers. — Dejan Stojanovic

They tugged plans and ambitions out their asses and held tight to the first that didn't smell so strongly of shit. — Patrick Bryant

Love brings to light the lofty and hidden characteristics of the lover
what is rare and exceptional in him: to that extent it caneasily be deceptive with respect to what is normal in him. — Friedrich Nietzsche

Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another. — Ambrose Bierce

World opinion, though sharply divided on nuclear tests and the risk of atmospheric pollution, could congratulate itself on being united in its opposition to cannibalism. No country in the world was prepared to support the custom of eating the dead, though the right of governments to kill people, individually or by hundreds of thousands, was not questioned for a moment. — Leonard Wibberley

if you worry about yesterdays moments, you are loosing your moments to live today!! — Anonymous

My inner goddess confirms that staring at a beautiful/rich/powerful face is the basis of True Love. — Jess C. Scott

I mean emotionally, women are like Bruce Lee and we're like Donald Duck. An' I think a lotta guys are afraid of that. — Jonathan Ashworth

Nothing helps your partner keep his mind on Jesus more than having a sign of His love tanned on your primary erogenous zones. — Scott B. Pruden

Satire today has become a flat 'tyre'. — Amit Abraham

Preferring the nausea of the path to its fated and certain ending. — Patrick Bryant

Thanks to photography, some memories overstay their welcome. — Mokokoma Mokhonoana

It's nice to be able to do things for other people, isn't it?

That's why it's fun to talk in the third person sometimes. — Patrick Bryant

Never underestimate the power of a well-placed apostrophe. — Holly Smale

An ignorant man who is regarded as knowledgeable by people who are more ignorant than him is still ignorant. — Mokokoma Mokhonoana