Retirement Home Quotes & Sayings

If you truly feel that self esteem and motivation have to happen first before you can make changes in your life, then we'll probably be sharing walkers at a retirement home as we talk over what might have been. — Shannon L. Alder

Just then Patrick finally came out of his rock. He looked around, but SpongeBob and the bubble were gone. "I knew I was dreaming!" SpongeBob was still chasing the bubble. "Bubble, stop! You have to go back and let my friend Patrick see you!" As he passed Shady Shoals Retirement Home, he accidentally dropped his bubble-blowing wand. But SpongeBob didn't stop to pick it up. He chased the bubble all the way to Jellyfish Fields. While trying to grab the bubble, SpongeBob accidentally dropped his bottle of bubbles. He kept chasing it until he was miles away from Bikini Bottom. BAM! Suddenly, SpongeBob found himself facedown on — Steven Banks

I want to be with my wife. Sitting on a deckchair, sipping some tea, and reading books in a retirement home, in a beautiful and warm place. I'm a romantic guy. — Robert Pattinson

It's the treasure in the empty field; it's worth selling everything to own
your entertainment, your 401(k) or your registered retirement savings plan, your home, your comfort, the sand where you stick your head, your last word, your right answers, your safe and predictable nice little life centered on avoiding heartbreak or inconvenience to your schedule. — Sarah Bessey

It's like living in a retirement home! Clarence is taking a nap right now, and he eats at five. It's so boring."
"You've only been here for two days."
"And that's been more than enough. The only thing keeping me alive is that he keeps a hefty supply of liquor on hand. But at the rate I'm going, that'll be gone by the weekend. Jesus Christ, I'm climbing the walls." His eyes fell on the cross at my neck. "Oh. Sorry. No offense to Jesus. — Richelle Mead

Too rich to be relevant to the world's poor, [Europe] attracts immigration but cannot encourage imitation. Too passive regarding international security. Too self-satisfied, it acts as if its central political goal is to become the worlds most comfortable retirement home. Too set in its ways, it fears multicultural diversity — Zbigniew Brzezinski

My grandmother, in her retirement home, actually has a picture of me from 'Star' magazine on their fashion police list. I think that's hilarious, but if Grandma approves, then I feel like I am all good. — Brad Goreski

During high school I worked in a retirement home. I spent many wonderful hours hearing from service men and their widows about WWI. — Charles Todd

She paused as she realized he was looking at her. 'Am I doing something wrong?' 'No. I was just thinking how incredibly beautiful you are.' That didn't seem to please her as her gaze danced around in obvious discomfort. 'You're still drunk, aren't you?' He laughed. 'No. The hangover is starting to kick in. Head hammering like a mother.' 'Ah, that explains it.' 'What does?' 'Your eyesight's screwed up. I could probably take you into a retirement home and you'd be trying to score with Grandma right now.'
- Shahara & Syn — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I'll wait until we're both old and gray, chasing you around the retirement home while pushing my walker if that's what it takes. — Ann Mayburn

Sixty felt like a big landmark. Not in a dreadful sense, but none of the other birthdays have bothered me. It's got labels on it - OAP, retirement - and I just wanted to take stock. I wanted to be in my greenhouse at home and at least give myself the opportunity of not working again. — Julie Walters

Step 1: Secure your basic needs: food, clothing and shelter. Step 2: Create a $1,000 emergency fund. Step 3: Pay off all debts as fast as possible, other than your home. Step 4: Increase your emergency fund until it reaches 6 to 10 months of your basic needs. Step 5: Begin saving 15 percent of your income for retirement. Step 6: If so desired, save for your child's college education. Step 7: Pay off your mortgage early. Step 8: Express your values with your money. Tactics That Bring Your Strategies to Life Live by a zero-balance budget, created at — Erik Wecks

When a man is forced into early retirement, he is often being 'given up for a younger man.' Being forced into early retirement can be to a man what being 'given up for a younger woman' is for a woman ... Why do many men get more upset by retirement than women do from the empty nest when their children leave home? When females retire from children, they can try a career; when a man retires from a career, his children are gone. — Warren Farrell

Yes, your kids should go to school. No, you shouldn't bankroll their degree whatever the cost. You've spent your life creating a sound financial plan; don't upend it by suspending your retirement savings or taking out a home equity line of credit to pay for a pricey college. — Suze Orman

Putting your time in at the office; dutifully spawning your two point five; smiling politely at your retirement party; then chewing on your bedsheet and choking on your canned peaches at the nursing home. It was better never to have been born-never to have wanted anything, never to have hoped for anything. — Donna Tartt

I firmly believe as an author you have to go out in life and hear the stories of people. In pubs in the UK or a retirement home in the US it is the stories of others that bring a book to life. — Charles Todd

Although it may not be a castle, [it is the] functional equivalent of a hotel room, a vacation and retirement home or a hunting and fishing cabin.. — John Paul Stevens

Over the past couple of months, Chantel had become a pro at leading book discussions and inventing fun games and trivia questions that all related to that particular month's book selection. Although, last month's theme, dystopian and the book selection "Matched" by Allie Condie, had the retirement home director a little concerned when everyone wanted to stop taking their medications. Not... a good... thing! — JoJo Sutis

The Respect for Elders Retirement Home on Moranbong Street. — Adam Johnson

Right now, we say in a traditional home one parent stays home with the children and the other provides the financial support for that family. That is the acceptable and right thing to do. If we begin to expand that, not only do we dilute the resources that are available, we begin to dilute things like health care, retirement, all the things offered to families that help them be a family. — Sharron Angle

Rut, routine, robotic. These are the three R's of adult-hood. Wake up, eat, go to work, eat, work more, come home, eat, sleep, and repeat every day until we all reach retirement, or death. — Craig R. Key

In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old people's home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day. You work for 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous, then you are ready for high school. You then go to primary school, you become a kid, you play. You have no responsibilities, you become a baby until you are born. And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa-like conditions with central heating and room service on tap, larger quarters every day and then Voila! You finish off as an orgasm! — Woody Allen

Americans think New Yorkers are property obsessed, but clearly they haven't lived a day in Hong Kong. In this part of the world, a man isn't a man until he is a homeowner. His entire life leads up to the singular moment when he hands over the down-payment check and puts his signature on the triplicate purchase agreement. All the good grades and job promotions he has received are mere preparation; and every source of happiness - marriage, children and retirement - depends on it. — Jason Y. Ng

For now I'm building up stories for the retirement home! — Carol Vorderman

Where you find the greatest good, there you will also find greatest Evil, for Evil likes Paradise every bit as much as Good does. What makes the best environment for Clematis armandi makes a lovely home for leaf hoppers. A place where Joe Allston hopes to enjoy his retirement turns out to be Tom Weld's ancestral acres and a place attractive to Caliban. — Wallace Stegner

Hi, Honey, I'm home - forever. — Gene Perret

Modeling was another job like some of the other ones I had. Working as a cashier, I delivered newspapers, I worked in a retirement home feeding elderly people ... so I never stopped and thought about, boy, I'm a successful model. — Kathy Ireland

Retirement homes are never lovely places. The food is usually overcooked, the carpet stained from overactive bowels, and the smell of hand lotion, cheap perfume, and urine never really leaves the place, no matter how many times the beds are washed and the walls are scrubbed. They are a place of holding, a purgatory to the not-yet-dead. — Jennifer Arnett

General Motors, like the other two geezers of the Old Three, is a vast retirement home with a small money-losing auto subsidiary. — Mark Steyn

A good job is more than just a paycheck. A good job fosters independence and discipline, and contributes to the health of the community. A good job is a means to provide for the health and welfare of your family, to own a home, and save for retirement. — James H. Douglas Jr.

We'd been bankrupt since we'd left home; we'd secure our own society. Retirement was an afterlife we didn't believe in and that we expected yesterday. — Kristopher Jansma

Davis is naturally a sweet-natured person.He's just been hanging around Nick and Gavin too long.Its a wonder they don't have him stealing candy from babies, or blasting rap music out of his car stereo in front of the retirement home. — Jennifer Echols

I was born and raised in North Little Rock, Arkansas. I was 15 when I got my first job serving food to the residents in a retirement home - 22 years later I would shoot my first film in one. — Joey Lauren Adams

You realize we're looking at our future, right? Two of us in a retirement home, bitching about our catheters and heated blankets. — Abigail Roux

The idea of the book [Japanes Lover] came in a conversation that I had with a friend walking in the streets of New York. We were talking about our mothers, and I was telling her how old my mother was, and she was telling me about her mother. Her mother was Jewish, and she said that she was in a retirement home and that she had had a friend for 40 years that was a Japanese gardener. This person had been very important in my friend's upbringing. — Isabel Allende

Parent in a retirement home is more likely to be visited by his grown children if they are expecting a sizable inheritance. But wait, you say: maybe the offspring of wealthy families are simply more caring toward their elderly parents? — Steven D. Levitt

O Winter! ruler of the inverted year, ... I crown thee king of intimate delights, Fireside enjoyments, home-born happiness, And all the comforts that the lowly roof Of undisturbed Retirement, and the hours Of long uninterrupted evening, know. — William Cowper

I use to live on this street when I was a kid where there was an old person retirement home, and all of the old people would listen to that band Herman's Hermits, and they would wear white nursing shoes. And they would throw away stacks of VHS tapes, and I would go through the trash and take them. — Harmony Korine

According to Father O'Dowd's description, the seminary catered to both ends of the religious life, training the next crop of young men taking holy orders and providing a retirement home for those closer to discovering if they'd backed the right horse. — David J. Oldman

The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating ... and you finish off as an orgasm. — George Carlin

No one should expect the value of their house to appreciate quickly - counting on your home to be a significant part of your retirement saving isn't a winning strategy - but it is reasonable to expect that prices generally will rise with at least the rate of inflation for some time to come. — Mark Zandi

If you're willing to put in the work, the idea is that you should be able to raise a family and own a home, not go bankrupt because you got sick, 'cause you've got some health insurance that helps you deal with those difficult times; that you can send your kids to college; that you can put some money away for retirement. That's all most people want. Folks don't have unrealistic ambitions. They do believe that if they work hard, they should be able to achieve that small measure of an American dream. — Barack Obama

You must prepare yourselves, young people, because Uncle Dave's generation is getting old. We are almost ready to go to the retirement home to spend the rest of our days tapping our bedpans rhythmically in time to "easy listening" rock 'n' roll. We must pass the torch on to you, and you must grasp it, ideally by the end that is not on fire. — Dave Barry

My brother and late sister and I were raised in Detroit; it was where the middle class across racial lines, the middle class was able to develop, build a home, have for the first time retirement benefits, have a job, and yes, their kids began to go to college. — Sander Levin

[Ed Grimley] lives in a retirement home in New Jersey. It's called the Retirement Home in New Jersey for Characters Who Were Interesting in the '80s for About an Hour. He's there with the Whiners, Gumby and Jon Lovitz's 'That's the ticket' guy. — Martin Short

Retirement: That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I'm home - forever." — Gene Perret

If we aren't profitable by December 20, I will close the business. That would leave him about $800,000, plus his retirement money and home, and he would do something else to earn a living. — Dave Ramsey

If you dread tomorrow it's because you don't know how to build the present, and when you don't know how to build the present, you tell yourself you can deal with it tomorrow, and it's a lost cause anyway because tomorrow always ends up being today don't you see ... We have to live with the certainty that we'll get old and that it won't look nice or be good or feel happy. And tell ourselves that it's now that matters: to build something now at any price using all our strength. Always remember that there's a retirement home waiting somewhere and so we have to surpass ourselves every day, make every day undying. Climb our own personal Everest and do it in such a way that every step is a little bit of eternity. That's what the future is for: to build the present with real plans made by living people. — Muriel Barbery

I work at a retirement home. I'm a CNA."
"What's that?"
"It stands for Certified Nursing Assistant."
"That sounds important," I said.
She laughed. "If changing old people's diapers is important."
I thought for a moment, then said, "It is for the old people. — Richard Paul Evans

All I hear is how to live longer, richer, and, of course, more laden with electronic gadgets. We are not the first generation to believe that the worst possible thing to befall us is death. But for the ancients, the worst possible outcome was not death, but a dishonorable death, or even just a regular one. For a classical hero, dying in a retirement home with a rude nurse and a network of tubes coming into and out of your nose would not be the attractive telos for a life. And, of course, we have this modern illusion that we should live as long as we can. As — Nassim Nicholas Taleb

I have known successful businessmen who, upon retirement, lost all zest for life. Their work had given their lives meaning. Often it was the only thing that had given their lives meaning and, without it, they spent day after day sitting at home, depressed, with nothing to do. — Viktor E. Frankl

I unwrapped my love for her like one might unwrap leftovers. Gotta eat up the old stuff first, as a cannibal might say in a retirement home. — Dark Jar Tin Zoo