Rectal Quotes & Sayings

You want me here. (Artemis) Yeah, like an alien rectal probe up my sphincter.' (Acheron) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I wish I had the voice of Homer to sing of rectal carcinoma. — John B. S. Haldane

I tensed up like someone had just given me a surprise rectal exam. — Kristin Walker

When I went to medical school, the term 'digital' applied only to rectal exams. — Eric Topol

As a columnist, I realize that whatever amount of corruption I expose, half my readers will block it out, although they may get a frisson of joy in the process. — Margaret Carlson

Foes I sniff, when I have less to shout
or murmur. Pals alone enormous sounds
downward & up bring real.
Loss, deaths, terror. Over & out,
beloved: thanks for cabbage on my wounds:
I'll feed you how I feel:--

of avocado moist with lemon, yea
formaldehyde & rotting sardines O
in our appointed time
I would I could a touch more fully say
my countless mind. The senses are below,
which in this air sublime

do I repudiate. But foes I sniff!
My nose in all directions! I be so brave
I creep into an Arctic cave
for the rectal temperature of the biggest bear,
hibernating -- in my left hand sugar.
I totter to the lip of the cliff. — John Berryman

The husband got in front of his wife but Gwen never understood the whole waiting-for-a-guy-to-protect-you thing. She was a runner and hopefully the guy could keep up. — Shelly Laurenston

Now, I've never heard a rabid hyena shriek from rectal acid burns. But I'll bet that sounds a lot like Mllsh-mllsh introducing a guest. — Rob Reid

That very afternoon, Taft fell seriously ill with what doctors mistakenly diagnosed as dengue fever. He remained bedridden for ten days, and when he returned to work, severe rectal pain prevented him from sitting. At the same time, a fungal infection developed in his groin. — Doris Kearns Goodwin

Every couple of years or so, when Daniel Clowes releases a new book, one can almost sense the rectal contraction across the collective seat of our humble profession. — Chris Ware

Reason and love are sworn enemies. — Pierre Corneille

...and then Danny was moving on him in the rhythm they'd found so easily in the past, their bodies remembering the way of it as if they'd never been apart, as if they'd only been waiting to find each other again. — Brooke McKinley

Your holiness disarms your enemies and silences them. — Sunday Adelaja

He's got the charm of a rectal probe, and no social skills to speak of, so nobody wants to go for a drink with him. Let's face it, dogs have more to look forward to in later life - at least they can go to the park and roll in shit. — Christopher Fowler

You are the best person I've met in years, and if I'd met you in a year's time, or maybe even a few months, I know we could be happy together, but I can't give you what you need. — Jane Green

I love to do movies. That's something that I find so much joy in, in being able to travel around and play new characters. — Hayden Panettiere

Dragonfly larvae breathe underwater through tracheal gills. These gills are located in a rectal respiratory chamber. Water is drawn into the rectum to the gills. This water-filled chamber can also function as a jet by the rapid expulsion of the water enabling the nymph to move at great speed for a short distance and escape danger or capture prey. — Laura Smith

I try not to take things lying down, especially rectal thermometers — Josh Stern

I am corrupted to the bone with the beauty of this forsaken world. — J.M. Coetzee

He had spoken with such absolute confidence that I knew he had to be blowing this out of his rectal orifice. — Neal Stephenson

Coffee is already known to be a preventive factor against mild depression, Parkinson's disease, and colon and rectal cancers. — Chris Kilham

Mostly things are not that way, that simple and pure, with so much focus given to each syllable of life as life sings itself. But that kind of attention is the prize. To be engrossed by something outside ourselves is a powerful antidote for the rational mind, the mind that so frequently has its head up its own ass
seeing things in such a narrow and darkly narcissistic way that it presents a colo-rectal theology, offering hope to no one. — Anne Lamott

Why were there some people who seemed so sure of themselves that it made him feel small and ignorant by comparison, as if they had a script to life with all the answers on it? He felt he didn't even know the questions. — Marcus Sedgwick

What if we could paint the moon a different color? Like - purple? — Tessa Emily Hall

I have a great gynecologist who is as gifted at listening as she is at rectal exams. — Tina Fey

The standard freak show chic bullshit which had beset the generation after mine thanks to a string of wildly successful reality shows centering on competitive body modification. I'd had fun watching Manual Mutants and Oddfellas when they first started, but then The League of Zeroes came along and made things too grotesque. They lost me when Rectal Rachelle died on the table during her ass-neck implant surgery. — Jeremy Robert Johnson

Ian's eyes settled on him, his expression grim. He bypassed everything, coming to a stop in front of the nervous young male. "I want all of your medicines to relieve fever, including liquids and capsules. Plus, I want a thermometer, the best one you have, and make sure it's not rectal." He narrowed his eyes at the wide-eyed clerk in front of him. "I don't do rectal, and I won't use anything that involves an ass. — Rose Wynters

Pam's father had been diagnosed with rectal cancer. It didn't surprise me. Put a bunch of white assholes together and you're going to find that going around. — Stephen King

A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature. Plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss. — Tina Fey