Rajskub Mary Quotes & Sayings

Mrs. Neverbody's Recipe for Making Crocodile Tears To a slice of hanky-panky Add some artificial cranky. Moisten well with canned boo-hoo. Flavor with a spoof or two. Drip this slowly - as it falls Roll it into little bawls. If you're careful, while they're cooling You can spread on only-fooling. (This recipe is not worthwhile Unless you are a crocodile.) — Jonathan Lethem

There is always the personal, simple happiness that doesn't happen. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

Harry was left to ponder in silence the depths to which girls would sink to get revenge. — J.K. Rowling

Wild rivers are earth's renegades, defying gravity, dancing to their own tunes, resisting the authority of humans, always chipping away, and eventually always winning. — Richard Bangs

Chloe is really just like an exaggerated aspect of myself. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

'24' is a pretty serious show - there isn't a lot of improv that is happening. Having said that, I do play around with the delivery. A lot of the humor comes from playing a character who is very furious and really up in her own brain and in a serious situation. That is humorous to me. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I grew up near the sea in British Columbia and San Francisco, and lived in Malibu and Fiji for years. I get uncomfortable being too far inland. — Raymond Burr

My stand-up has always been very character-based. I'm not really the kind of person that's like, 'Hey, here's what's on my mind! Tip your waitress!' I would create the jokes based on the character I was playing. It was always a performance-based thing for me. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I've been a weirdo since I was a kid. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I hadn't even watched '24' before, and the audition was kind of far away. When I got the material, there wasn't a character yet, so it almost seemed like an assistant to Jack Bauer saying, 'Yes, sir. No, sir.' — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I like America. I think it's pretty cool. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

When you go to auditions, pretend you already have the job and you're just presenting - almost like you're at the table read. Don't go in with an air of, 'Please like me,' or, 'Please hire me.' You're like, 'Here's my take on it. Take it or leave it. I've got a lot of other things to do today.' — Mary Lynn Rajskub

Lust was his favorite sin, without a doubt. — J.M. Darhower

To really be on stage and not know what you're going to say, and to be able to say something that makes people laugh, or do something that's sort of abstract or off the beaten path and have people connect to it by just putting your ideas together, that really makes me happy. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

India is a youthful nation. Can't we think of exporting good teachers? — Narendra Modi

I need to see where I am physically and practicing with NHL players is the best way to find that out. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

Our ports and our borders are the most unprotected fronts in the war on terror. — J. D. Hayworth

I went to art school for fine art and then I started doing performance art, and then I started making fun of performance art, and it turned into comedy. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I personally have a background of many days on end of confusion, understimulation, overstimulation, and uncomfortableness with the world around me. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I read a fan bulletin board once, and somebody said I had a face like a potato, so I never went back on there. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I told my agents that I didn't want to go on the audition. But as that was happening I called my mom, who has been watching the show from the beginning, and my mom said, 'It's the coolest show. You have to go.' — Mary Lynn Rajskub

God, she was so tight, my dick felt like it was being strangled. — Kendall Ryan

I don't like magic. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

If we continuously protest and complain about our life then we actually create barriers in the manifestation process and the natural flow of life. — Hina Hashmi

The more I get to do this character, the more I realize that she's not just annoying. It's that her strength is not interacting with people socially. She just doesn't have time because she has so much going on in her brain. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

It always surprised me that I was getting acting work. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I'm not married and I don't think that's going to work out for me. I'm not even bitter, I'm just exhausted. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I would say that I love pizza so much that sometimes I eat pizza while I'm eating pizza. Like, I'm so content with myself with how it's going that I'm like, 'I should do this more,' not realizing that the mouth is full. I'm just cramming pizza into my mouth. — Mike Birbiglia

I got into acting to avoid politics of any sort so I could remain in a fantasy world. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

Everyone in the movie industry wants to win an Oscar. I don't think that's why you make movies. But winning an Oscar is not just about making a great movie, unfortunately. It's also having a good Oscar campaign. — Mick Jagger

The cruelty intrinsic to the workhouse system was excused by the need to discourage idleness, much as the malice intrinsic to the mental hospital system has been excused by the need to provide treatment. — Thomas Szasz

I had fun doing a lot of low-budget movies and web series. And I got back into stand-up where I started. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

Let's get something straight, MacKeltar. I am not going home with you. I am not going to bed with you, and I am not wasting one more moment arguing with you."
"I promise not to mock you when you change your mind, lass. — Karen Marie Moning

I have to paint at least two times a week, and there's not enough time in the day to do everything. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

The really cool challenge of '24' was learning on camera how to be a dramatic actress. The biggest difficulty was the industry side of things. I was very lucky that I had Joel Surnow, one of the creators of '24,' in my corner. Early on, the Fox executives couldn't believe that I was on the show. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I always love performing live, and that's what I was doing that started getting me acting parts, so I still find time do it. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

I don't think my acting was ever bad; I always knew that I could do it. But when you go to audition for a drama, they're very serious in the room, and I was used to being kind of goofy and having small talk. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

'24' is not an anti-government show, really. We've always relied on Jack to fight for the greater good in his own way, and at times, '24' is very patriotic. For me personally, I definitely pay attention to things in a different way. — Mary Lynn Rajskub

How inimitably graceful children are in general-before they learn to dance. — Samuel Taylor Coleridge

I'm doing stand-up comedy. I'm working on a one-woman show about how I don't like my baby. There is a period of time where a baby is born where the next 3 months is harrowing. A lot of people say it's the most wonderful time, but for me it was harrowing. — Mary Lynn Rajskub