Preferred Toilet Quotes & Sayings

It occurred to me, while sitting on the cold white toilet seat pretending to pee in order to avoid Bob, that I much preferred having the power over the man and deciding when to cut the cord, over being powerless and on the receiving end of the silent fade-away. — Meredith Schorr

It was a terrible thing to undergo, but during the year I stood there I had time to think that the greatest loss I had known was the loss of my heart. While I was in love I was the happiest man on earth; but no one can love who has not a heart, and so I am resolved to ask Oz to give me one. - The Tin Woodsman, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz pgs 72-73. — L. Frank Baum

Sweetness was a sign that a plant was edible (most plants that are poisonous to humans taste bitter). Sweetness is also an indication that the plant is high in glucose, which meant that it would offer us lots of energy. — Cameron Diaz

moment that the parents of one's friends choose to die or go to — Julian Fellowes

Love is a handful of seeds, marriage the garden, and like your gardens, Paula, marriage requires total commitment, hard work, and a great deal of love and care. Be ruthless with the weeds. Pull them out before they take hold. Bring the same dedication to your marriage that you do to your gardens and everything will be all right. Remember that a marriage has to be constantly replenished too, if you want it to flourish ... — Barbara Taylor Bradford

I think it is more like a ghost that has been following us both. Something vague that we're not seeing, something more like a feeling. — Conor Oberst

The Persian rug served as their country. The brawnier toilet paper people opted to live in its jade green jungles while the more sensitive and reflective toilet paper people preferred hiding in its opal cream sky. They were so light. No one would ever be able to tell that they had lived there. — Cherry Tigris

It is amusing to wonder whether dreams would matter at all, or "freedom" or "democracy." I think not; I think there would only be the wondering what to eat and where to sleep and how to build out of the wreckage of life and mankind. — Sylvia Plath

Worry is spiritual nearsightedness, a fumbling way of looking at little things, and of magnifying their value. — Anna Robertson Brown Lindsay

Ah, the painful truth: Fate was a cosmic toilet. It was the nature of the universe to flush sluggish things that failed to exercise free will. Stasis was stagnancy. Change was velocity. Fate - a sniper that preferred a motionless target to a dancing one. — Karen Marie Moning

When you're on TV, you're looking at a half-page of material, trying to memorize it really quickly. By the time it's on TV, I've already forgotten what I said, but I can still recite my whole role from Shakespeare in the Park. It works a different set of muscles. — Jesse Tyler Ferguson

There's no way that I could do a 9 to 5 job. There's no way. I was not cut out for that. You come in and you work for three months on the one job. They say, 'Great,' you know, and you're on to the next one - and you never even got fired. It's wonderful. — Dennis Quaid

It was simply because, as a doctor, I don't believe a drug should be taken for anything that is just uncomfortable or self-limiting. — Arthur Hailey

There is no doubt that the garrulous bore is the most maddening creature to be shut up with for any length of time, on the wide earth ... As a matter of fact, I have sometimes wondered if these impulsive, perfectly meaningless murders of which one has read at times, can have come about through one party babbling on endlessly - just once too often - when the other longed to be left in peace. — J. E. Buckrose

We may be unlovely yet we are not unloved. — John Ortberg

I was a total education geek. I loved school. I loved learning. I loved doing homework. All of my books and notebooks from high school are underlined and highlighted and there are notes all over the margins. And you know, I was a theater kid too. I was all over the place. — Sophia Bush