Practical Joker Quotes & Sayings

Love was love, one could find it with anyone, one could find it anywhere. It was just that you could never keep it. Not unless you were ready to die for it. — Norman Mailer

I think the oddest thing about the advanced people is that while they are always talking of things as problems, they have hardly any notion of what a real problem is. A real problem only occurs when there are admittedly disadvantages in all courses that can be pursued. If it is discovered just before a fashionable wedding that the Bishop is locked up in the coal-cellar, that is not a problem. It is obvious to anyone but an extreme anti-clerical or practical joker that the Bishop must be let out of the coal-cellar. But suppose the Bishop has been locked up in the wine-cellar, and from the obscure noises, sounds as of song and dance, etc., it is guessed that he has indiscreetly tested the vintages round him; then indeed we may properly say that there has arisen a problem; for upon the one hand, it is awkward to keep the wedding waiting, while, upon the other, any hasty opening of the door might mean an episcopal rush and scenes of the most unforeseen description. — G.K. Chesterton

You look at the movie and you see all kinds of dastardly things going on. But then you catch yourself and you say, "It's only a movie! It's not the truth." And so it is with life. You observe everything that's going on in life, you watch, you look, you see. Yet you never react. You're never for or against. You understand, and this makes you free. — Robert Adams

There is no salvation for the soul but to fall in Love. Only lovers can escape out of these two worlds. This was ordained in creation. Only from the heart can you reach the sky: The Rose of Glory can grow only from the heart. — Rumi

THREE DAYS LATER A MESSAGE WAS LEFT UNDER A PEBBLE UPON THE SUNDIAL." "'If it really annoys you, Hilton, we might go and travel, you and I, and so avoid this nuisance.' "'What, be driven out of our own house by a practical joker? — Arthur Conan Doyle

You know, I'm a father. I'm a brother. I'm a son. And I'm a grandfather. So many times I have to be the intermediary, the person to referee and help solve disputes and to protect and to guide. — Ruben Santiago-Hudson

Dirge of the dying and the stench of fear,
Black souls repent as hell draws near,
- Percy Pemmeney the smuggler, from Curse of Ancient Shadows. — Rod Tyson

Elvis was, at least the times I was around him, Elvis was a practical joker. He was always, had some little mischievous something going. — Jackie DeShannon

His Charles Bronson-like demeanour together with his Clint Eastwood stare and his John Wayne swagger, created from a diet of westerns and Eighties TV mixed with a lifetime of planning, organising, managing, and leading, were now gelled together with the battle-hardened soldier he had become. — Connor Fitzgerald

As his wife, Emilia must know Iago better than anybody else. She does not know, any more than the others, that he is malevolent, but she does know that her husband is addicted to practical jokes. What Shakespeare gives us in Iago is a portrait of a practical joker of a peculiarly appalling kind, and perhaps the best way of approaching the play is by a general consideration of the Practical Joker. — W. H. Auden

You're quiet this evening," he said.
I pasted on a pleasant smile. "It's been a long week. I'm just trying to relax." And I was trying to avoid more drama. He was quiet for two or three minutes, during which the two of us stood there together, black-clad vampires moving around us. "I can tell something's bothering - "
We had sex and you bailed, I silently thought, and now your contrition is driving me crazy. "I was just enjoying the music. — Chloe Neill

My father, the practical joker, did not care for practical jokes on himself; he did not encourage the practice in me. — Lincoln Steffens

Not every love comes to a successful conclusion. — Santosh Kalwar

I'd worked with Marlon [Brando] a couple of times, and he was a practical joker. He was far more interested in getting jokes out than getting the words out. We laughed all the time. — Johnny Depp

Fastings and vigils without a special object in view are time run to waste. — David Livingstone

They say when you're about to die, your entire life flashes before your eyes. Well, now I know that when you're about to kill someone, the same thing happens. Except that instead of your entire life, it's just the moments you had spent with that person, and as every moment flashes by, it now contains a chainsaw. — Cherry Cheva

I'm a traveling practical joker. That's my line of work. — Colin Mochrie

The average human being is a perverse creature; and when he isn't that, he is a practical joker. The result to the other person concerned is about the same: that is, he is made to suffer. — Mark Twain

The more I know about people, the better I like my dogs. — Mark Twain

The practical joker despises his victims, but at the same time he envies them because their desires, however childish and mistaken, are real to them, whereas he has no desire which he can call his own. His goal, to make game of others, makes his existence absolutely dependent upon theirs; when he is alone, he is a nullity. Iago's self-description, I am not what I am, is correct and the negation of the Divine I am that I am. If the word motive is given its normal meaning of a positive purpose of the self like sex, money, glory, etc., then the practical joker is without motive. Yet the professional practical joker is certainly driven, like a gambler, to his activity, but the drive is negative, a fear of lacking concrete self, of being nobody. — W. H. Auden

Autobiography is usually honest but it is never truthful. — Robert A. Heinlein

If you want thousands, you have to fight for one. — Terry Pratchett

Faith in the guidance of Spirit gives you the courage to take risks, because you're assured that whatever happens, a Higher Power is on your side and you will survive. — Colette Baron Reid