Paramedic Quotes & Sayings

I wanted to be a doctor when I was young. I also wanted to be a paramedic, but I always wanted to be an actor as well. I didn't have kids or something that I needed to provide for. — Christopher Parker

A car hit a Jewish man. The paramedic says, "Are you comfortable?" The man says, "I make a good living." — Henny Youngman

The night before, Paramedic (in Training) Lindsey Lee Wells had diagnosed him with moderate contusions and "sprained balls" after an exhaustive search of medical Web sites. She diagnosed TOC as suffering from 'I'm-an-asshole-and-Lindsey's-never-going-to-speak-to-me-again-itis'. — John Green

I'll speak for myself, but there's a lot of humor to be found in sarcasm and darkness. You talk to any paramedic, they survive by developing a pretty off-kilter sense of humor. — Nicolas Cage

Oh, so it was a lifesaving kiss."
"Well, if you want to put it that way ... "
Arrogant jackass. "Do me a favor: next time you think my life needs saving, just let me die. I'd really prefer it."
He laughed.
She shook her head. "I'm going to the front with the boys. Don't follow me. You and your paramedic kisses need time to cool off. — Ilona Andrews

The paramedic called the press and sold me like a loaf of bread. This was news, and he wanted to be the one to report it. — Charlie Sheen

I once threw myself down a flight of stairs rather than face even one moment with a milliner, at whose shop I quit working after discovering the sinister truth about her berets, only to find that the paramedic who repaired my fractured arm was a man who had fired me from a job playing accordion in his orchestra after only two and half performances of a certain opera. — Lemony Snicket

I want a tattoo over my heart that reads TRY HARDER YOU LAZY PARAMEDIC SHITBAG OR I WILL HAUNT YOUR BEDROOM FOREVER — Warren Ellis

I was watching Maury Povich the other day. He had these people on who say that they've had near death experiences. Do you ever notice they always say the same thing? 'I remember seeing this really bright, white light.' It's like, of course, you pinhead, it's the paramedic looking in your pupils with a penlight. — Carol Leifer

Did you get checked out?" "Yeah, by a hot blond who sat in the corner of the bar and made googly eyes at me." "I meant by a doctor." "No, but a balding yet bizarrely hot paramedic said I'd be fine." "Oh, and he's an expert?" "At flirting. — Darynda Jones

Whenever I play with him , I usually try to make it a foursome - the President, myself, a paramedic and a faith healer. — Bob Hope

Jena took a seat on the sofa, and Cole found himself with another dilemma. Should he sit next to her or take the other chair? Such a decision shouldn't feel momentous, but it did. It felt as momentous as a choice between the past and the future.
It felt like a choice between friendship and maybe more than friendship.
He sat next to her on the sofa. — Susannah Sandlin

And Jazz snapped.
He didn't snap the way a normal person might snap. A normal person would fling his arms around and stomp his feet and rant at the top of his lungs, bellowing to the sky. There might be tears, from a normal person.
Jazz went quiet. He darted out one hand and grabbed the wrist of the paramedic who had been trying to cuff him and pulled the man close, holding his gaze.
In a moment, he channeled every last drop of (his father).
Who am I? I'll tell you. I'm the local psychopath, and if you don't save my best friend's life, I will hunt down everyone you've ever cared about in your life and make you watch while I do things to them that will have you begging me to kill them. That's who I am. — Barry Lyga

Well, it's not swollen," he stated, rewrapping the bandage, "or bleeding or leaking, so I think it's okay."
"I know. I'm training to be a nurse," I replied. "Thanks though."
"Explains the curiosity and attitude."
"What?" I snapped.
"I'm a trainee paramedic."
"Oh." I looked away, chewing my lower lip. "Right."
"There's a sense of rivalry between Emergency Medical Technicians, paramedics, and nurses - I don't know the reason behind it."
"I know. — Shaye Evans

That won't happen," Dean said. "This is America. You can't just hunt people because they're different." "Can't you?" Rudy said, leveling his gaze at the paramedic. "It wasn't all that long ago that, in parts of this country, the death of a person of a certain color was looked upon as no different than killing an animal. — Jamie Davis

As soon as he was gone I blew my breath out and leaned back against the wall. Awkward. First the cop who'd arrested me, then the paramedic who'd kept me from accidentally killing myself. I didn't even want to think what a third thing might be. — Diana Rowland

We have unfinished personal business I do believe." He smiled. "And I do love to make you blush."
"It clashes with my hair. — Susannah Sandlin

The paramedic whispered in my ear 'God will never leave you or forsake you.' — Bethany Hamilton

I thought, I can't do advertising any more, so I was downloading all these PDF applications from community colleges. And I thought, I'll become a paramedic. I'll get a two-year associate degree, if I can get in. — Augusten Burroughs