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Onion News Quotes By Anonymous

Facebook this week announced that it's experimenting with a tag that will mark sites such as the Onion, Clickhole and Empire News as satire and, hopefully, alert the millions of gullible people who share information from these sites as truth each week. — Anonymous

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Nimrod continued, "These were the one percent of wealthy pigs who ruled over the ninety-nine percent of people with their greed and their selfishness! But I swear to you by my very head and by the head of my queen Semiramis, that as our subjects you will never go hungry!" The crowd burst out in applause. He milked it, "You will never be without shelter in the great city of Babylon!" More applause resounded. "You will never be without health and welfare!" The applause turned to jubilation. Nimrod reeled them in like a fish on a line. "You will be taken care of from birth to death under the mighty rule of Nimrod, emperor of the earth!" The masses swarmed with worship and screams of orgasmic release. Nimrod had secured their total dependency upon city-state and king. Nimrod had become their lord and savior."
Author: Brian Godawa

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