Observational Humor Quotes & Sayings

Whatever story you're telling, it will be more interesting if, at the end you add, and then everything burst into flames. — Brian P. Cleary

It's not technically gossip if you start your sentence with "I'm really concerned about ," (fill in the name of the person you're not gossiping about). — Brian P. Cleary

Everyone has their personal topics. My comedy has always been very strong on observational humor, it stems from what I see every day in my life. — Iliza Shlesinger

When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon. — Brian P. Cleary

The smartest man in the room doesn't visit many rooms. — Garrett McCoy

The only ironic thing about that song is that it's called 'Ironic' and it is written by a woman who doesn't know what irony is. That's quite ironic when you think about it.

(on Alanis Morissette's 'Ironic') — Ed Byrne

Norway ... looked to Roosevelt as funny a kingdom as was ever imagined outside of opera bouffe ... It is much as if Vermont should offhand try the experiment of having a king. — Edmund Morris

Observation:

Thanks to technological advances, avid readers seem to be replacing DTBAD (Dead Tree Book Acquisition Disorder) with an alphabet soup of more more modern-day hoarding behaviors: EBAD (E-Book Acquistion Disorder), EGAD (Electronic Gadget Acquisition Disorder), and ABAD (Audiobook Acquisition Disorder). Of course, there's also MYBAD (Movie and YouTube Acquisition Disorder: the hoarding or obsessive viewing of digital films and videos, some based on books). If any of these syndromes describes you, take heart: there's probably an app for that! - 8/9/2013 — Lisa Tolliver

Tuesdays are the worst. They are the spoiled leftovers of Mondays, repackaged with a new expiry date. — Sorin Suciu

He cleared his throat, very carefully, to bring the stillness to a more bearable level without breaking the unwritten rule that governs both churches and freshly fallen blankets of snow. — Anna Mattaar

Don't know if it's good or bad that a Google search on "Big Bang Theory" lists the sitcom before the origin of the Universe — Neil DeGrasse Tyson

Not only is love blind, it's a little hard of hearing. — Brian P. Cleary

As an author I'm in my head all day and I worry that I lose touch with reality. But then my dog pees on my shoe and I know I've found it again. — Michelle M. Pillow

Lettie sighed - wisdom seems to be highly correlated with sighing. — Laura May

The generations that were exposed to sitcom have the people actually saying the line, saying the joke, whereas sort of before that, you have much more observational humor. — Robert Mankoff

There's no such thing as free kittens. — Brian P. Cleary

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Need I say more? — Chris Rock

If a couple has their picture taken at a wedding or other social gathering, and the woman looks hot, her guy could be blinking, chewing, or even mid-sneeze, and she'll still display it on her desk at work. — Brian P. Cleary

I never wanted to do observational humor because I never wanted to tell people what they were seeing. — Richard Lewis

Chances are, if we can't laugh at something, we can't think rationally about it. — Clay A. Johnson