Nattiest Quotes & Sayings

But once more I say do as you please, for we women are born to this burden of being obedient to our husbands, though they be blockheads — Miguel De Cervantes Saavedra

Once I entered the house late at night and overheard Mark and my mom having sex by the fireplace. She was moaning like she was flying on a magic carpet. I almost puked into the kitchen sink. I would give anything for her to dump him. Jade's mom says it will never happen because women over 45 have a better chance of getting blown up by a terrorist than finding a man. Haha! If I ever get that desperate, I will buy a giant vibrator and never leave the house. — Allison Burnett

When God is truly angry, He will not send vengeful angels.
He will send Magdalena.
Then take her away. — Josh Bazell

We were starting to lose track with Earth because fame and success brings you many things that you're not really prepared for or know how to deal with as a human being. — Paul Simonon

Nothing stands still, except in our memory. — Philippa Pearce

Think what we would have missed if we had never ... used a mobile phone or surfed the Net
or, to be honest, listened to other people talking about surfing the Net. — Queen Elizabeth II

According to the dictionary, "Islam" means "submission" in Arabic. A Muslim is someone who is submissive to God. Why does he submit? Because his God is the best, the brawniest, the nattiest, but most of all because, if he says anything to the contrary, he will burn in hell until well after the end of the world. The believer is thus encouraged not to screw around with God under penalty of something worse than death for all eternity. — Charb