Moment You Realize Funny Quotes & Sayings

If you go to war with your mind, you will always be at war. — T. Scott McLeod

That awkward moment when you realize someone was actually home the whole time you were singing on the tops of your lungs. — Kasey Collin P. Dumdum

Death ... doesn't take her eyes off us for a minute, so much so that even those who are not yet due to die feel her gaze pursuing them constantly. — Jose Saramago

I didn't start smoking weed till my junior year. I had a boyfriend who smoked a lot, and I was like, "Oh, I guess I'm moving on to this phase of life." I didn't fight it at all. — Ilana Glazer

Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way;
But to act, that each tomorrow
Find us farther than today. — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

I believe every editor should stand to edit. That's just my particular soapbox. Some things are so delicate and depend on such fine, delicate work. One frame in one direction or another can make such a difference and it is, in that, like brain surgery. — Walter Murch

Under current law volunteers who are not working with an official nonprofit organization are not covered by the Volunteer Protection Act. Therefore, there are absolutely no legal protections for the average American who wishes to volunteer. — Jon Porter

The men I idolized built their bodies and became somebody - like Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger - and I thought, 'That can be me.' So I started working out. The funny thing is I didn't realize back then that I was having a defining moment. — Dwayne Johnson

It's funny, but thinking back on it now, I realize that this particular point in time, as I stood there blinking in the deserted hall, was the one point at which I might have chosen to do something very much different from what I actually did. But of course I didn't see this crucial moment for what it actually was; I suppose we never do. Instead, I only yawned, and shook myself from the momentary daze that had come upon me, and went on my way down the stairs. — Donna Tartt

Then not everything is gonna be the way you think it oughta be. It seems like everytime I try to make it right, it all comes down on me. Please say honestly you won't give up on me, and I shall believe. — Sheryl Crow

Prayer is the spontaneous response of the believing heart to God. Those truly transformed by Jesus Christ find themselves lost in wonder and joy of communion with Him. Prayer is as natural for the Christian as breathing — John F. MacArthur Jr.

It took me a moment to realize he was joking. He was very dry. He didn't even smile at his own jokes, let alone laugh at them. Didn't give you any clues he was being funny. Oh, — Joe Hill

No relationship is easy, and nobody should ever think it is. The minute you start forgetting the needs of the other person is when you get in trouble. — Goldie Hawn

I became a manager very young. My first sous chef job I was, maybe, 25. It was a bit too early for me. But it's on-the-job training. You really just get stuck in there and it's trial and error. You learn by your mistakes, and hopefully you don't keep making them. And if you do, you just keep trying to fix it. — April Bloomfield

And I like the light-up."
"The what?"
"The light-up," he'd say. "You know, that look people get when they finally realize you're for real. It's like electricity. It makes me tingle all over. Like a blanket full of static."
Ew. "Really? I've never heard that."
"Yeah, and I like it when people realize we're out here."
I leaned in close once and asked him, "Do you want your mom to realize you're out here? Do you want her to know?"
"Nah. It took her too long to get over me."
All in all, he was a good kid. — Darynda Jones

What you don't even realize now - what you will only come to understand in time, but lucky for you, I'm here to tell you - is you're not going to give two shits about this band in a few years. In fact, I guarantee that this group that you admire so much and that you are putting all of your love and dedication and devotion into will be nothing more than an obsession you will be immensely embarrassed of having had. One day you'll be in college, maybe you'll be at a party, and someone will say, 'Hey, do you remember The Ruperts? How shitty was their music?' and you will have a moment of crisis: Do you admit your former love for them, or do you concede, because you know in your heart that this person is right? And guess what you'll say? You'll say, 'Yeah, their music was utter. Putrid.Garbage. — Goldy Moldavsky

Whoa, whoa, whoa," Mark said. "It couldn't have been that long. It happened to us just a few days ago." "I don't like it ... when people doubt my words," Jed said, his tone changing drastically in the middle of his sentence. It suddenly turned threatening. "How can you sit there and accuse me of lying? Why would I lie about such a thing? I've tried to make peace with you, give you a second chance in this life, and this is how you repay me?" His voice had risen in volume with every passing word until he was shouting, his body trembling. "It ... it makes my head hurt." Mark could tell Alec was about to explode, so he quickly reached over and squeezed his arm. "Don't," he whispered. "Just don't." Then he returned his attention to Jed. "No, listen, please. It's not like that. We just want to understand. Our village had the ... — James Dashner

I've always liked fast cars and slow women. — Jack LaLanne

If you have ever seen a dragon in a pinch, you will realize that this was only poetical exaggeration applied to any hobbit, even to Old Took's great-granduncle Bullroarer, who was so huge (for a hobbit) that he could ride a horse. He charged the ranks of the goblins of Mount Gram in the Battle of the Green Fields, and knocked their king Golfibul's head clean off with a wooden club. It sailed a hundred yards through the air and went down a rabbit-hole, and in this way the battle was won and the game of Golf was invented at the same moment. — J.R.R. Tolkien

my house only felt like a home underwater, in floods; my father was an astronaut because to me stars or the distant flashing of satellites seemed closer than wherever he was; when — Neil Hilborn

of Place and the rest of her Hollywood oeuvre. Ferring had won two Emmys for Lakeview, the Jeffersons look-alike series she'd starred in. She'd been photographed at one White House gala with President Clinton and another — Sara Paretsky

But it was kind of a major clue when a lady ran away from a bloke.
That said something, it did. That was a signpost that read: approach with caution. Falling rock up ahead. Handle with care. You've come so far with her, much further than you ever thought you'd get. Don't fucking blow it now, son.
That signpost was one of the busiest he had ever laid eyes on. It had a hell of a lot of text. He figured pausing to read all of that was a good thing. — Thea Harrison