Mistake Funny Quotes & Sayings

It was almost funny, to be making this mistake. She was too old for this shit. Crying was for pussies. Making a mess of herself served no purpose at all. Now was the time to toughen up. — Kylie Scott

Life is funny like that, making us pay for the same stupid mistakes even after we've learned from them thoroughly. — R.K. Lilley

It's funny because you do often read in recounts of very famous albums, people tend to focus on mistakes in really positive ways, and there's certain mistakes of my own that I always do find on every record that I needed to accept. I find it really interesting to talk about. I always write songs at the wrong tempos, and I have to learn to accept that a little bit. — Zach Condon

The whole idea of losing one's virginity is kind of ridiculous. To lose something implies carelessness. A mistake that you can fix simply by recovering the lost object, like your cell phone or your glasses. Virginity is more like shedding something than losing it. As in, Don't worry, Mom. You can call off the helicopters and police dogs. Turns out - get this - I didn't actually lose my virginity. I just cast it off somewhere between here and Monterey. Can you believe it? It could be anywhere by now, what with all that wind. — Sarah Ockler

I go "I just want a cup of black coffee." She goes "Do you want to try a biscotti? They're from Italy and they're considered a delicacy." Have you ever eaten one of these things? It tastes like a burned cookie. Where I'm from, that's considered a mistake. — Bill Engvall

I think when someone who's known for doing drama does a comedy but just tries to be funny, that's a mistake. — Steve Carell

First rule of thievery,' Eli said, grinning, 'only run if you're not coming back.' ( ... ) 'First rule of thievery, never use the same entrance twice.' Miranda rolled her eyes. 'How many 'first rules' of thievery do you have?' 'When one mistake can mean your head on a pike, every rule's a first rule,' Eli said cheerfully. — Rachel Aaron

It's especially hard to admit that you made a mistake to your parents, because, of course, you know so much more than they do. — Sean Covey

He does have that weird mixture of born again Christian and stupid that some people mistake for courage and focus. — Marc Maron

Pray for the love which allows you to see the good in your companion. Pray for the love that makes weaknesses and mistakes seem small. Pray for the love to make your companion's joy your own. Pray for the love to want to lessen the load and soften the sorrows of your companion — Henry B. Eyring

Tomorrow, Trubshawe, I am going to get married again, thereby quite possibly making the greatest mistake of my life. — David Niven

Christopher throws dandelion head after dandelion head into his bag. It's getting heavy now and his fingers are stained from the work but there are still so many left to kill. His biggest mistake is giving them names. — Brian Martinez

I think I'll accept the challenge to battle. I can choose the terms, right? And I don't have the faintest idea how to 'prevent' a revolution. Besides, as far as I know, revolutions can get out of hand. Remember the German revolution, with the guillotine?"
Derna smirked. "German revolution? Guillotine? The guillotine was used in the French revolution. Nice try, little brother."
"I'm actually impressed he knew what a guillotine was," commented Armen, deadpan.
I glared at the two of them. Typical big sisters. They'd just ruined my chance to show off my knowledge. — Kaivallya Dasu

Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else's can shorten it. — Cullen Hightower

I'm going to take a shower," I said and prepared for the comment I knew was coming.
"You know what they say, conserve water and shower with a friend. — Chelsea M. Cameron

I don't consider myself a funny girl, but I do have a sense of humor because I don't take myself too seriously. Taking yourself too seriously, I think, is not right. Life is supposed to be funny. Because if you can laugh about yourself when you made a mistake or when you did something wrong, you can learn from it. — Stephanie Sigman

All humans learn from each other's mistakes. Intelligent humans learn how to avoid them, idiots how to do them. — Raheel Farooq

You're serious?"
"As a heart attack."
I set my bag down and leaned on the counter. Okay, Hunter Zaccadelli, you could make me dinner.
"Stuffed French toast, sweet potato hash and strawberries and cream."
"Breakfast for dinner? You rebel, you. — Chelsea M. Cameron

It was funny - I'd sort of expected this place to be all dark and furtive, full of blokes darting nervous glances over their shoulders in case anyone they knew wandered in by mistake and saw them. Instead, it was all bright, gleaming white, the merchandise proudly displayed like a prozzie in an Amsterdam window. Only a lot less likely to give you the clap. — J.L. Merrow

Ah,' said Fudge, who looked thoroughly disconcerted. 'Dumbledore. Yes. You - er - got our - er - message that the time and - er - place of the hearing had been changed, then?'
'I must have missed it,' said Dumbledore cheerfully. 'However, due to a lucky mistake I arrived at the Ministry three hours early, so no harm done. — J.K. Rowling

The dentist drills some more and you hear him make a mistake. And to cover it up, they all say the same thing: "Okay, rinse." — Bill Cosby

I went camping and borrowed a circus tent by mistake. I didn't notice until I got it set up. People complained because they couldn't see the lake. — Steven Wright

Don't take yourself too seriously. It just makes life all the harder. It'll all come out in the wash anyway, because God's glory eventually will eclipse everything that goes wrong on this earth. Lighten up and learn to laugh at yourself. None of us is infallible. We make mistakes in life, and more often than not, they're funny. Sometimes, being your own source of comedy is the most fun of all. — Luci Swindoll

I voted for Ralph Nader in 2000, but I will not make that mistake again. The joke is over for Nader. He was funny once, but now he belongs to the dead. — Hunter S. Thompson

Don't get any funny ideas
When all is said and done, you're still artificial (a thing) ... Not human. Don't make the mistake of falling in love with one. — Shungiku Nakamura

Tawny shrugged. "I was overreacting. Typical big sister move. He explained why he did it, and it makes sense, in a slightly twisted way. He's not a bad guy. He's just a jerk. But a nice one."
"That doesn't make any sense."
"Men rarely do. — Chelsea M. Cameron

I told them a thousand times if I told them once:
Stop fooling around, I said, with straw and sticks;
They won't hold up; you're taking an awful chance.
Brick is the stuff to build with, solid bricks.
You want to be impractical, go ahead.
But just remember, I told them; wait and see.
You're making a big mistake. Awright, I said,
But when the wolf comes, don't come running to me.
The funny thing is, they didn't. There they sat,
One in his crummy yellow shack, and one
Under his roof of twigs, and the wolf ate
Them, hair and hide. Well, what is done is done.
But I'd been willing to help them, all along,
If only they'd once admitted they were wrong. — Sarah Henderson Hay

Mr Tanner frowned at him, as though he was a spelling mistake. — Tom Holt

The irony is that what was supposed to be a great vulnerability of Hillary Clinton , which the Iraq war vote which she has acknowledged was a terrible mistake, has lent an aura of strength in a funny way. — Joe Conason

It's hard to believe someone who walks around commanding so much attention with his acute cockiness, hard muscles, and tattoos would ever let someone like me bring him to his knees-and make no mistake, I bring him to his knees. I bring him to his knees, hard. — Skyla Madi

Finn is God: So much for Earth Day. I totally screwed things up and started celebrating the wrong planet. Now I have to collect all these stupid trademarked dog figurines that I distributed all of the yard. At least it's better than last year's mistake when I had butt statues everywhere. — Jessica Park

Funny thing about those Middle Ages, said Joseph. They just keep coming back. Mortals keep thinking they're in Modern Times, you know, they get all this neat technology and pass all these humanitarian laws, and then something happens: there's an economic crisis, or science makes some discovery people can't deal with. And boom, people go right back to burning Jews and selling pieces of the true Cross. Don't you ever make the mistake of thinking that mortals want to live in a golden age. They hate thinking. — Kage Baker

I was sorry to read in yesterday's evening papers that your house was recently burglarised while you were elsewhere propounding the moral virtues of private enterprise.
I'm sure you'll be able to see the funny side of it!
I expect your mistake was to inform the robbery squad at your local police station that your house would be empty. That's always asking for trouble. — William Donaldson

Roan tried not to stare, but the guard's head was almost perfectly egg shaped. He wanted to ask him if he'd ever had a hen sit on him by mistake. — Andrea Speed

There are no funny lawyers - only funny people who made a career mistake. — Robert J. White

There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory. — Josh Billings

It's so funny because, when the other world was being hatched and conceived, I just kept hearing, "Don't do that! That's a huge mistake! People love your characters. Why go to these new ones?" And I was like, "No, we can do this! I'm invested. Why wouldn't they be?" — J.H. Wyman

You're not just doing that to impress her, are you?"
"Everything I do is to impress her. It's my mission in life," he said with a completely serious face, while he squeezed my knee under the table.
Mom burst out laughing. "I like him," she said.
"Me too. I think I'll keep him," I said, taking his hand and twisting my fingers with his.
"Good," he said, giving my hand a squeeze. — Chelsea M. Cameron

About mistakes it's funny. You got to make your own; and not only that, if you try to keep people from making theirs they get mad. — Edna Ferber