Matrimony Funny Quotes & Sayings

It was all Mrs. Bumble. She would do it," urged Mr. Bumble; first looking round, to ascertain that his partner had left the room.
That is no excuse," returned Mr. Brownlow. "You were present on the occasion of the destruction of these trinkets, and, indeed, are the more guilty of the two, in the eye of the law; for the law supposes that your wife acts under your direction."
If the law supposes that," said Mr. Bumble, squeezing his hat emphatically in both hands, "the law is a ass - a idiot. If that's the eye of the law, the law is a bachelor; and the worst I wish the law is, that his eye may be opened by experience - by experience. — Charles Dickens

This world is inescapably linked to the motions of the worlds above. All power in this world is ruled by these options. — Aristotle.

It had been, in Robin's view, the most perfect proposal, ever, in the history of matrimony. He had even had a ring in his pocket, which she was now wearing; a sapphire with two diamonds, it fitted perfectly, and all the way into town she kept staring at it on her hand as it rested on her lap. She and Matthew had a story to tell now, a funny family story, the kind you told your children, in which his planning (she loved that he had planned it) went awry, and turned into something spontaneous. She loved the tramps, and the moon, and Matthew, panicky and flustered, on one knee; she loved Eros, and dirty old Piccadilly, and the black cab they had taken home to Clapham. She — Robert Galbraith

No one deserves anything from you. No one deserves your trust or your love - they have to earn it. — An Na

Let age, not envy, draw wrinkles on thy cheeks. — Thomas Browne

Having blown up my own long-term marriage via an extramarital affair, followed by a traumatic divorce, I tend to think of love as less a gently glowing hearth than a set of flaming train tracks you strap yourself onto. — Sandra Tsing Loh

If we take matrimony at it's lowest, we regard it as a sort of friendship recognised by the police. — Robert Louis Stevenson

Every minute i spend talking to you is a mnute i could spend practicing the violin, and when you're a musical genius like me, every minute counts. — Lemony Snicket

The art of biography is more difficult than is generally supposed. — Thornton Wilder

The fight isn't over until you win. — Robin Hobb

Bella ... my sweet little flower," he said softly, reverently as he took her head between his hands and pressed their foreheads together. "After over four hundred years of solitude, I think I am ready for you and an entire barrel full of children. Nothing could please me more."
"Oh, Jacob," she sighed with delight, kissing his lips eagerly. "How did I get so lucky?"
"Well, as I recall ... you had the bad luck to fall out of a window."
"Ah, but that was good luck, because you caught me."
"No, little flower," he murmured, pausing to kiss her deeply and thoroughly. "I think it is safe to say that you are the one who caught me. — Jacquelyn Frank

I asked of Echo 't other day (Whose words are few and often funny), What to a novice she could say Of courtship, love, and matrimony. Quoth Echo, plainly, Matter-o'-money. — John Godfrey Saxe

These things end," she said. "They always end. Nobody marries their first love. First love is just
that. First. It's implied that something else will follow. — Rainbow Rowell

Sometimes the leads are equally balanced, like in 'Romeo and Juliet,' but sometimes they're just not. — Ailyn Perez

Suffering was not a punishment from beyond or a malevolent infestation of the soul. Like the earth turning on its axis or energy passing through a conductor, it was a part of the natural world, to be studied, understood, and, when possible, managed. — Joshua Wolf Shenk