Quotes & Sayings About Lube

His eyes are so heavy-lidded I can only see a slit of silver gleaming down at me. Then he licks his lips, and a thrill shoots up my spine. I know that look. I love that look. Wes shoves his trousers down. His thick erection slaps my abs. "I want to touch you," I beg. "No." His tone is commanding. It only intensifies the thrill. "Gotta hold you down so you don't go running off again." He gives me another lingering kiss just to drive the point home. And when he finally releases my wrists, he's off the bed before I can reach for him. "Don't move," he whispers, and I go still, watching in near fascination as he charges across the room to where he dropped his wallet. He opens it, extracts one of his handy packets of travel lube, and returns to the bed. "Arms over your head. — Sarina Bowen

Grab the lube, 'cause you are so going for the Fucking God button. — K.D. Sarge

I switched to using I Can't Believe It's Not Butter as my anal lube," Earl said. "My cholesterol is down 20 points. — Jon Konrath

Tell me you spotted a condom tree over to the right by the stream of lube. — Jane Davitt

I struggled not to laugh at the brand-new bottle of lube in his left hand and the unopened box of condoms in his right. He watched me, his expression dark.
"Just buy those?" I asked lightly.
He nodded once.
"Had it all worked out in your mind, did you?"
He nodded again.
"Have you ever fucked a man, Seven?"
He shook his head, his right hand squishing the box of condoms as he tightened his grip.
"And ... this is what you want?" I looked at his face then, watching for any signs of doubt. There were none as he nodded again.
I opened my arms. "Come here," I said softly. — T.J. Klune

Dear Lord," began Randy, who paused for long enough that Tristan sneaked an eye open to look at him. His saw his mother's cheek twitch with what he thought might be apprehension. "We are so grateful to be gathered here today with our family, and the family of our brother's homosexual boyfriend, and our new little goth friend who has a gay dad, whatever the heck that is all about. We'd like to say we're grateful this year for condoms, lube, and Ellen Degeneres, and for those guys on Queer Eye ... "
Randall Evan Phillips!" his mother shouted. — Z.A. Maxfield

Jesus and Paul were serious dudes. They had teeth missing. Jesus was a carpenter, Paul was in prison. These guys didn't eat tofu dogs and bean sprouts. They didn't play tennis. If there were trucks back in their times, they would have been doing driveway lube jobs on a Saturday afternoon. Same thing with King David. Yeah, he might have played a lyre, but he slaughtered thousands of guys. — Mark Driscoll

Oh God! You asked Jared for lube?"
"Yeah. Why not?"
"It just seems weird."
He shook his head at me and smiled. "When we first met, I thought you were an uptight prep."
"And now?"
"Now I know you're an uptight prep." He pressed closer. "Cute, though."
"I though you were a punk."
"And now?"
"I think you're amazing."
"Zach?"
"Yeah?"
"Shut up a d kiss me. — Marie Sexton

Furi grabbed the base of his cock to keep it from exploding. It took a few seconds before he was able to spread a thin layer of lube on his cock. With just a small dollop on his finger he pushed it inside of Syn's impatient channel. He closed his eyes and took a calming breath before lining up his long cock with Syn's hole. He tapped Syn's hole with his cock to tease him a little more, knowing the man was beyond ready to be fucked. "Furious. — A.E. Via

If you can't joke about giant french ticklers and gas powered dildos in a fucking locker room then the terrorists win, E. Our freedoms are eroding. I'll pick up lube and condoms instead. Bring your hand. It's the only action you're getting. — Celia Aaron

Expecting someone?" I tease, as if Connor's not here just about every night she isn't at his grad dorm.
"Not if I don't finish my homework," she says, picking the pen back up and tapping the course packet with it. "Even when he's not my teacher, Connor's a pain in my ass."
"They make lube for that, you know."
"Francesca?"
"Yes?"
"Get out. — Dahlia Adler

Arik didn't know how long he'd been in hell. Time was one never-ending, no-lube f&*k when you were in the dark and in agony. — Larissa Ione

Y'look like someone told you they'd stopped making lube. — K.A. Mitchell

Definitely. I've got posters of girls in bikinis, too. And like, a whole bedside drawer of lube." "I would be disappointed if you didn't." Cassidy laughed. — Robyn Schneider

The burn was immediate but welcomed. He rode his own fingers, getting lost in the friction, his eyes sliding closed. The bed shifted and Judge was gone but Michaels didn't stop, couldn't stop. Judge was back with the lube, hurrying out of his jeans and spreading the slick liquid on his fingers before he even got back on the bed. Someone else was just as restless as he was. Michaels pulled his t-shirt all the way off, spreading his legs wider in obvious invitation. "Fuck," Judge whispered; his eyes on Michaels' stretched hole. He rolled a condom down his long shaft and slicked himself up good. When — A.E. Via

Side effects from doggie joy may include face lube and leg-humping" ~ Oberon — Kevin Hearne

Ty burst out laughing when he saw it. "Is that a travel pack of lube? I didn't even know they made those."
Zane grinned. "Where the hell have you been buying your lube? — Madeleine Urban

God rolled the condom onto his aching cock and applied a generous amount of lube. Day got up and turned around, putting his back to God's broad chest. God let Day position his cock at his entrance and ease down onto him at his own pace. God gritted his teeth at the perfect view of his cock being swallowed by this sexy man. "Oh my fucking god. Leo, fuck," God groaned through gritted teeth. Leo's — A.E. Via

You keep your phone under your pillow?" Kelly asked with a laugh. This was the first time they'd shared a bed while Nick was on duty. "How does it fit beside your gun and your knife and the lube? — Abigail Roux

Exercise is roughly equivalent to an oil lube and a filter for a car. You don't have to do it, but when you do, it makes the car run a lot better. — S. Jay Olshansky

Don't come in, Dad!" Hank said.
"Believe me, I won't," Karma said with a vocal shiver. "Just ... I have, um, condoms and lube." And in a mutter, "Your mother made me. — Eli Easton

Toys like handcuffs, paddles, and nipple clamps?" Andrew arched a brow. "Or flavored lube, anal plugs, and edible panties? — Alicia White

But I hate being a grandfather. It's indecent. In my mind's eye, I'm still twenty-five. Thirty-three max. Certainly not sixty-seven, reeking of decay and dashed hopes. My breath sour. My limbs in dire need of a lube job. And now that I've been blessed with a plastic hip-socket replacement, I'm no longer even biodegradable. Environmentalists will protest my burial. — Mordecai Richler

While Hannah was busy positioning the laptop and shimmying out of her shorts and a thong, I pushed off my boxers and squirted lube into my palm. I glanced at my cock. It stood stiffly from me, nine thick, smooth inches for which I didn't thank God often enough. — M. Pierce

I decided to go for the honest answer. "My guess is I'm going to bed with a mental image of you, some lube and a box of tissues. — Kirsty Moseley

No more goddamn fingers. Fuck me already," Syn hissed over his shoulder. Furi slapped Syn's ass a few times with his hard cock. "Damn, you are a bossy bottom, aren't you? Look at you. Aching for my cock," Furi moaned, rubbing his sheathed cock up and down Syn's crease. He grabbed the lube and drizzled it messily over Syn's hole. "Damn, — A.E. Via

You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack. — Jeff Foxworthy

You're so hot," Avery said, and the emotion was clear on his face. They had to be thinking the same thing. "I'm not," Kane said, kissing Avery's parted lips. "You're still the best looking man in the room. Any room," Avery declared. Kane slanted his mouth over Avery's and kissed him with everything he had. Those words stroked his heart and turned him on every single time he heard them. Avery fought for dominance in the kiss, pushing Kane against the sink. Kane worked to remove Avery's clothes as Avery worked the cap off the lube, coated his fingers, and slid them deep inside his ass. The delicious burn and stretch had him abandoning the kiss and tossing his head back as he let out a deep groan. — Kindle Alexander

You don't fuck with fate, Oz, because she'll ass-rape you with no lube, wearing a spiked dildo. — Katrina Monroe

I've tackled many challenges in my lifetime. The most satisfying ones were food related. Like the 2-pound burger at Fuddruckers that I had to devour in 15 minutes. Shattered it in 5 minutes and 46 seconds! Or
the Blazing Challenge at Buffalo Wild Wings: eat 12 blazing wings in 5 minutes. Killed it in 57 seconds! Quaker Steak and Lube's all-you-can- eat wings in one sitting? I may still hold the record in Madison, Wisconsin, for scarfing down 78. I'll never forget when 6 linemen and I went to a sushi restaurant during the time of the 2011 Rose Bowl in Pasadena. We didn't exactly take on an eating challenge, but we did get kicked out of the place when the owner ordered, "Go home now.
You've eaten eight hundred dollars' worth of sushi. — Jake Byrne

To promote the sales of GM vehicles, Obama says the government will stand by your GM car warranty. And all the taxpayers will get a lube job. — Ann Coulter

I'm going to take you home, strip you down, and fuck you - " "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!" Kevin said. He was back to pushing away from Jagger. "I think you forgot something there. Actually, I think you forgot several things!" Jagger cocked his head. Kevin held up one finger. "Kissing. There has to be lots of kissing." Then a second finger, and one more for each point he ticked off. "And foreplay. What is it about men thinking foreplay doesn't exist? I want some groping and rubbing and more sucking! Then - No, before the foreplay starts, but it can be during foreplay, too - a shower. Gods, a nice, hot shower." Kevin's eyes gleamed. "The two of us, naked, soapy, rubbing all over each other. But no soap for lube, that burns." Another finger went up. "Food. I might even need that before all else, except maybe the kissing. If it's garlicky food, then - — Bailey Bradford

Money was invented as a lubricant for the barter system, but we're way overdue for a lube and oil change. — Daniel N. Robinson

The Brit's face shares a heritage with a junkyard butt-sniffing mutt. It's a hard-earned moonshine mug, dotted with a hairy mole that looks like a rat's been gnawing on it. His beard looks like a white sneeze. The teeth are jagged and out of alignment, having opened quarts at Jiffy Quick Lube for half a decade. — Brett Tate

You think he has some bomb defusing MacGyver contraption cooked up that involves lube, condoms, and a paper clip? — Stephani Hecht

At the end of the day, I was still a virgin, all alone in a dark room, humping a lubed-up robot. — Ernest Cline

Judge moaned and rose up to his knees in answer. Michaels gripped the base of his dick. "Oh my god. Look at you." Michaels put his tongue deep inside Judge's cavern, stabbing it in and out without mercy. Judge's sensual moans spurred him on, had him overwhelmed with wanting him. Michaels quickly spread some lube down his length. Holding on to Judge's shoulder with one hand, he parted one fuzzy cheek with the other and slid his lubed cock up and down that dark crevice. Driving both of them mad. "Fuck me. Austin." Michaels — A.E. Via

Something just ain't right about thanking the Lord for sending you an opportunistic pretty boy who carried a string of condoms and single use packets of lube in his pocket. Still, I did it. — James Buchanan

Yeah, well there's your first problem. You don't get it. You can't even see what you did. You're going to sit here today and you're going to convince yourself that you were right and I was unreasonable and you won't even think about what you just tried to make me into. But hey ... It's not my problem, now. You think what you want. I'm gone."
He sighed and reached for my suitcase. "Will you at least let me help you down the stairs?"
"Fuck off." I'd rather break my neck than let him give me a second of assistance.
"Topher, come on!" Now he sounded annoyed and seriously, fuck him, he didn't get to be pissy over this. I turned around and gave him a withering look.
"Be sure you clear the lube out of the bedside table before you bang your wife in that room. It's a dead giveaway. — Amelia C. Gormley

Syn was so gone watching his fingers disappear inside the flushed opening that he quickly lathered more lube on his hand to get his cock nice and slippery. With his hooded eyes leveled on the pulsing hole, he lined his cock up and began to push inside with slow, steady pressure. Remembering exactly how Furi always did it. He got past the first ring of muscle with a pop and both of them let out a startled grunt. Syn — A.E. Via

I'm gonna need a strap-on, a dildo, some lube, condoms, and more of that tequila. — Kendall Grey

It works ... (Dr.Ducks Ax Wax & String Lube) .. makes the strings last longer ... — Larry Coryell

En route to the final destination, which was always to get trashed, wasted, hammered, crunked up, bombed, wrecked, sloshed, fried, flapjacked, fucked-up, or get plainlong fucked, laid, drained, get some ass, get some head, some skull, a lube job, get your oil changed, get some brown sugar, quiff, goo, pussy ... — Tom Wolfe

How did they even fit you inside a jail cell with a head that big?" "Same way I got inside you. Lots of lube, baby. — Cassia Leo

Did I use enough lube last night?"
I turned my head to the side and closed my eyes with blushing
cheeks. "Don't ... don't call it that."
"What? Lube?" he asked. I nodded and covered my mouth with my
hand. He chuckled and smirked. "All right, did I use enough stuff last
night?"
"Mm-hmm. — J.M. Colail