Looniest Quotes & Sayings

She was thinking of his mouth on hers. Which seemed only fair since he'd given a lot of thought to the same thing.
"'Night," she whispered.
"Night," he whispered back.
And yet neither of them moved. — Jill Shalvis

All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth, my two front teeth, see my two front teeth! — Donald Yetter Gardner

Hey, and the rock star is here too! How you doing, son?"
"Hey, Mr. Rossi. Thanks for having me today. I'm doing great. How have you been?" I answered.
He lowered his gaze and stepped closer to me. "Good, good, son. I'm sure glad that everything was settled and you didn't have anything to do with hurting our Gracie. Lea told me that you were the one to help her when that son of a bitch got his hands on her. We're forever in your debt, Shane. I knew you couldn't have hurt her." He slid in front of the dining room chair at the head of the table, and sat down, leaning back with his arms folded across his chest. A serious expression crossed his features, "So did anybody get the son of a bitch, yet? Or am I going to have to make some calls ... " Holy shit, it's like the Godfather. — Christine Zolendz

Come! surely you've got a heart hidden away somewhere; open it up; give it air; show at least some little corner of it. — Mark Twain

I am diagonally parked among the vertically parallel people of this horizontal universe. — Vikrmn

It is imperative that a woman keep her sense of humor intact and at the ready. She must see, even if only in secret, that she is the funniest, looniest woman in her world, which she should also see as being the most absurd world of all times. — Maya Angelou

First of all, no candidate is going to win by catering to the alleged Occupy Wall Street vote. — Jim DeMint

Like the fact that he's my twin brother and I know you'll eventually ask us to double-penetrate you."
I tried very hard to look shocked. "I don't even know what that means, Shane."
"And you're never going to find out. — Nick Pageant

We adored it, and discussed it, and swapped jokes from it, and it made us feel more alive. In some way, it was cathartic: it exhilarated us by lifting us up above our everyday frustrations and boredoms. It gave us a liberating perspective on this odd event unfolding around us, called 'our life.' And when, years later, I became bewildered by the reception of Monty Python by some of our looniest fans, I suddenly realised they were experiencing exactly the combination of emotions that had rendered me such a devotee of the Goons, and so I was able to forgive them. — John Cleese

We need, in every community, a group of angelic troublemakers. — Bayard Rustin

So the poet, who wants to be something that he cannot be, and is a failure in plain life, makes up fictitious versions of his predicament that are interesting even to other persons because nobody is a perfect automobile salesman. — Allen Tate