Lifeguards Quotes & Sayings

Your lullaby would waken a drunken goblin! — J.R.R. Tolkien

Now my second story. Three years later, on a clear, bright, calm Sunday afternoon at Bondi Beach, also not far from where we now stood, from out of nowhere there came four freak waves, each up to twenty-five feet high. More than 200 people were carried out to sea in the undertow. Fortunately, fifty lifeguards were in attendance that day, and they managed to save all but six people. I am aware that we are talking about incidents that happened many years ago. I don't care. My point remains: the ocean is a treacherous place. — Bill Bryson

Nothing good can proceed from our will until it be formed again, and that after it is formed again in so far as it is good, it is of God, and not of us. — John Calvin

A little Jewish Grandma is at the Florida coast with her little Jewish Grandson. The grandson is playing on the beach when a big wave comes and washes the kid out to sea. The lifeguards swim out, bring him back to shore, the paramedics work on him for a long time, pumping the water out, reviving him. They turn to the Jewish Grandma, and say, we saved your grandson. The little Jewish Grandma says, He had a hat! — Henny Youngman

Pools of blood are not recreational even lifeguards drown when the undertow breaks bread with the underbelly demons disguised as sharks have not put enough thought into their costumes a wiseman stays ashore when pointed fins read like italian subtitles the end is near ( ... ) the beginning — Saul Williams

This leads me to suggest an endeavour should be made to make cricket more exciting, and have more thrilling incidents. I believe the best way would be to count two runs for every maiden over bowled during the match. For instance, the MCC side bowl 30 "maidens" getting rid of Notts; they therefore would start their (MCC) innings with 60 runs, and Notts, bowling only 15 "maidens," would have 30 runs added to their score. — Fred Spofforth

An aphorism is not an aphorism unless you know what it means. — Winston Churchill

God is love. His plan for creation can only be rooted in love. Does not that simple thought, rather than erudite reasoning, offer solace to the human heart? — Paramahansa Yogananda

By the way, don't thank me for saving you, thank the lifeguards. If it was up to me, I would've just carried you off to the building by the boardwalk that said SURGERY. I'm sorry, but there's a big difference between a family doctor treating you for the sniffles, and a guy who actually owns and knows how to use an operating table. — Elle Lothlorien

The sages are often ignorant of physical science, because they read the wrong book-the book within; and the scientists are too often ignorant of religion, because they too read the wrong book-the book outside. — Swami Vivekananda

[When asked, as a prospective Presidential candidate, whether she had ever committed adultery:] No. But then most congresswomen don't have 25-year-old lifeguards throwing themselves at their feet around this place. — Patricia Schroeder

Am I alive and a reality, or am I but a dream? — Edgar Rice Burroughs

There is no difference between a hero and a coward in what they feel. It's what they do that makes them different. The hero and the coward feel exactly the same, but you have to have the discipline to do what a hero does and to keep yourself from doing what the coward does. — Cus D'Amato

You don't believe in writing in books?" "Of course not. Nor do I dog-ear the pages, crack book spines, underline passages, or otherwise mistreat government property. — Elizabeth Camden

THE LAST THING I LEARNED ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS by swimming in the pond was there are more lifeguards than sharks. What I mean is, for the most part, other people aren't out to get us. — Donald Miller

Maybe life was just a series of phases - one phase after another after another. Maybe, in a couple of years, I'd be going through the same phase as the eighteen-year-old lifeguards. — Benjamin Alire Saenz

As long as a population can be induced to believe in a supernatural hereafter, it can be oppressed and controlled. People will put up with all sorts of tyranny, poverty, and painful treatment if they're convinced that they'll eventually escape to some resort in the sky where lifeguards are superfluous and the pool never closes. Moreover, the faithful are usually willing to risk their skins in whatever military adventure their government may currently be promoting. — Tom Robbins

The humble histories of hearts cannot be brushed aside forever by the great events of nations. — Milan Kundera

Part of being a big winner is the ability to be a big loser. There is no paradox involved. It is a distinctly Harvard thing to be able to turn any defeat into victory — Erich Segal

A willing, cheerful worker, with his heart in his job, will turn out more work and more satisfactory work in 44 hours than an unwilling worker, dissatisfied with his conditions, will turn out in 54 hours. It is good business, therefore, for every employer to go as far as he possibly can in reaching a schedule agreeable to his people. — B.C. Forbes

My parents were disappointed I didn't finish college, and they were really upset when I went to Hollywood to become an actor. I was a big disappointment to them. — George Clooney

Embraces are comminglings from the head even to the feet, And not a pompous high priest entering by a secret place. — William Blake

San Quentin's is the safest beach in the world. We're not talking about lifeguards here who might yell at someone who's being rude-we're talking about armed guards, in watchtowers, two blocks away. — Anne Lamott

I have said so many times to many people on the spiritual path, 'You must be strong in yourself to help others. People who are in the emotional sea need someone who can pull them out, not someone who gets in with them and gets dragged away by the tidal wave of human emotions. We have to become emotional lifeguards. — Gordon Smith