Lariza Mendizabal Quotes & Sayings

I am filthy. I am riddled with lice. Hogs, when they look at me, vomit. My skin is encrusted with the scabs and scales of leprosy, and covered with yellow pus.[ ... ] A family of toads has taken up residence in my left armpit and, when one of them moves, it tickles. Mind one of them does not escape and come and scratch the inside of your ear with its mouth; for it would then be able to enter your brain. In my right armpit there is a chameleon which is perpetually chasing them, to avoid starving to death: everyone must live.[ ... ] My anus has been penetrated by a crab; encouraged by my sluggishness, he guards the entrance with his pincers, and causes me a lot of pain. — Comte De Lautreamont

WARNING
This is a bawdy tale. Herein you will find gratuitous shagging, murder, spanking, maiming, treason, and heretofore unexplored heights of vulgarity and profanity, as well as non-traditional grammar, split infinitives, and the odd wank. If that sort of thing bothers you, then gentle reader pass by, for we endeavor only to entertain, not to offend. That said, if that's the sort of thing you think you might enjoy, then you have happened upon the perfect story! — Christopher Moore

Above all, Vietnam was a war that asked everything of a few and nothing of most in America. — Myra MacPherson

Get a better job, Harve. Ask for a raise. Good Lord, we aren't living. We're existing! — Gil Brewer

Everyone tells me to play as long as you can. Sometimes, it goes in one ear and out the other. — Gary Speed

I'm going to be the nominee. It's very hard not to look at the recent polls and think that the odds are very high I'm going to be the nominee. — Newt Gingrich